I love being inside my cave! My cave loves being inside me!
BAD PERSONALITIES
BAD PERSONALITIES BIG REX Chapters 6 to 10
[ 118 ]
Good evening, again friends and another warm Fractal welcome, back to you all. Yes, both the dead and the living. The great ages, full of fractal sages warns : There will be days and there will be nights. As you about to enter Chapter six, be forewarned! It will be full of frights.” In you, the devil do.” And now, that said lets begin. The fractal door creaks opens once more. Slowly once more! Look! Yes, you, look!
Gaze into eternity, invisible and alone, gaze in to eternity and see, stories to frighten and stories to make you sigh, stories to make you ask the questions why? Stories of hate, stories that make you want to debate the reason and where with all of your fate! Stories that search, quests that dare to inquirer into your private hidden puddles of desire. Mysterious Fractals galore, sure, the case debased in incredibility malitity mentality of evility.
Are you sure?
Are you positive you want to come in?
[ 119 ]
BR.
BR, events kicked him.
BR, events made him.
BR, events remolded him, shaped him!
Sometimes, we all might find our life, turned upside down, and we are living in a nightmare
coming out of the ground! One type of madness or another.
Perhaps a lover, tweets you, they found somebody new, and the wedding is off permanently too. You run off with a guy or gal on the fly, and you thought they were nice, but he turns out, not to be. Life is a movie, the part you play, changes from day to day, in every way.
Questions, why? Why me? Why did this happen? Why did this happen to me, to us, to them?
We say sometimes, things we don’t mean.
But, in the world, there are forces, unseen, you’ll get over it, forget it, or get depressed, hurt your own self, and shriveled up and die!
[120 ]
Why?
Many colors are in the sun’s sunshine.
Red is the color of blood.
Red is the color of heat.
Red is the color of meat.
Red, white and blue are in the sunshine too!
Big Rex’s heart, has been hurt, and for all intentional purposes, his heart, although beating, is dead!
Little love in it, is found.
[ 121 ]
So, profound, rightly or wrongly?
Is it he, who will live to walk in the lemon rain, sunshine, among the green stalks?
The two earth’s upper and lower, new worlds without girls? Or possibly, there may be one find for him, unknowns is, this man’s fate, left to debate, incoming breezes, bring problems to be faced, squeezed in his short life time.
Mad, madness, it is his cover to hide, to hide his sadness?
Yet, for reasons outside of our comprehension, destiny, it must of read, his no nonsense, primal, cruelty, that is found in the wild humans, only documented by his mad behavior, in his deadly resume!
And out of billions of people on Earth who were good, mentally healthy, decent and trust worthy, and alive, out of them, he is the saved one.
[ 122 ]
Is it he who will save what’s left of Mankind’s world. This crazy man, has been chosen, as the savior of all?
Into his hands, and his demented mind, depends so much! Ironic is it not?
The conditions of fractal Earth, are nothing more than damaged goods, mere has beens, washed up and lost artifacts.
Can a madman bring them back?
Dead Earths back to life?
Earth, where man used to live, what a hap, hazard, miss mash, of bizarre challenges, he now has to face. He just can’t stop.
Mother nature, the cruel one, she doesn’t want him to! He just can’t stop! Bizarre challenges he now, has to face!
And for every minute that now passes more and more events seem to pit him against, the trials and tribulations, that the forces in space, the forces of time, the forces outside of the knowing mind, the forces of nature combined, has in store waiting for him, and his little, little mind. Waiting, waiting to test him to death.
Unknown to him, as he scurries around in the dark bottom of that boat, he suddenly accidentally stumbles, trips and falls down a damaged stair case.
[ 123 ]
He falls and tumbles over, and over, and bangs his shoulder, into a gray metal door, marked in white block letters,” employees only,” and, it swings open! And, much to his surprise, inside are about about 20 large, 10 gallon, water cooler jugs, just full of nice, clean, fresh water! Such a cherished find, blew his mind, and although he’s bruised, and a little banged up, it brings a moment of happiness to him.
He can always use more water, but, how does one man bring such heavy Bottles upstairs? He’ll have to get Jonathan to help. Oh yes, he smiles, thinking to himself. Seems like saving that boy. Saving his life, wasn’t such a bad idea, after all. Ha, ha, ha, ha, . . .
But, that’s a problem BR, doesn’t mind solving at all. But, then while down below, he suddenly trips again, in the dark, on a soggy, wet yellow curtain, and thinks, WoW, this is good material to make a tent, or a rug!
If only, he could get it upstairs too. It would come in mighty handy! But then again this would, requires Jonathan’s help!
He realizes in the ship, there is a virtual treasure trove of things, he could find useful, that he can use to rebuild his life with, and of the lives of the two men he just saved. But, a even bigger surprise, lies in store for him again, as fate taps him on the shoulder, with one heck of a big surprise, indeed!
People! More people, than he could ever imagine survived too! No, not thousands of people, but, about a hundred and thirty or so! Lots of kids, children, young and old.
He discovers them, when he pulls the curtain aside, only to uncover below deck, a large lunchroom full of people, people who have been trapped in the dark for days, hungry confused and disoriented.
Many with broken bodies, injured and traumatized! Living in their own puddles of urine, and feces, maggot invested! All around them, surrounded, by dead passengers and their excrement. When he lifted the cover up, a large stinking gas cloud, rose up and hit his nostrils, with the pungent stinkyness of the dead!
That, Oder, like a fog into his face! The smell of the thick death, permeates the air in there, with the special unforgettable stench of death. He pulls back the door, that was covering the hole and he is as shocked to find them, as they are to see him up above, in a hole in the ceiling high above them.
[ 124 ]
They looked up, waving enthusiastically, smiling, happily. He looks down. He shines a flashlight to the ground. The ground, covered with half naked filthy bodies. That’s what he sees. Its dark, that’s what these people see, up above them, a light shinning like a beacon in the night.
Someone is up there. A rescuer has come!
It’s such an awe inspiring delight for them. Hard for them to realize, that after all this time. All this horror, all this madness, finally, finally they are going to be saved. He looks at them thinks to himself, whats this? Are they bugs? They are bugs, little bugs to fry in my frying pan, buggers or maybe not? He thinks. As he looks at them good, his head crazy as usual!
His mind spinning like a dime, insanity, dominating him, spiraling around. He looks down at them They’re, are only a few, out of, out of, what looks like a thousand dead ones or more, all smelling! They’re down in, down in a hole about 24 feet down below him or so.
How, to get them out, he will have to throw down ropes, and rig up a pulley. Perhaps two! A lot to do! Now, now, he is faced with the question. How? How to get out, all of those who are not injured, make them understand, that, no policemen or fireman, Doctors, nurses, or rescue teams, are looking for them, coming to rescue them. Just him, madman, BR!
Will they understand when this Madman tells them, that every bodies is dead, their families, their friends, the internet, their world.
[ 125 ]
The world that they know is gone. It’s now a memory, and he is the rescue team. He is the one who will, or will not save them. They are not in a position to say no, to a madman, like this joe, not when that madman is the only one who can save them.
That he has stipulations for them, yes, the madman does!
They will have to comply with or die! This guy, this guy, he is just crazy enough, crazy enough, to slam the door back and leave them. Cold hearted is he, you see, destiny checked out his resume, and wants him that way.
[ 126 ]
Life strifes, life’s knife drama o sama, You see danger in here be, yes, black is light, some people think, while they raise the glass of spiritual drink, he too, like you, like you, dare swallow a gulp?
Destinies cocktails in bulk, asymmetric subconscious details, oh rife, ripe hand, player-man, of nature’s black band. If you sleep, and some of you do, who are not dead, and hear in your head, the band playing, be very afraid. BR, is the rebel blade, singing the tune! And he is near by. The crazy man, the bugger bumble bitch man.
BR,
He wants to form a gang. One by one, those whose life’s, he has saved, he in-slaves.
The members, recruit he will, from death’s doorstep.
Now, some people are inexperienced, clueless, super intelligent in their own field. But, when they step outside their sphere of individual special field of knowledge, childlike they become, vulnerable to the ploys and games mother nature, spits in their face, as she so often does, she does so playing with them from time to time, but unsuspectingly they don’t get it, they don’t even know they are being played, in spades, and stumble, in their sleep, creep dead, deep!
Now, BR, will be their leader, good, evil, mad or mad not, whether they like it, or like it, not. Snot, coming out of your nose, if you have one?
[ 127 ]
And that leader, is a killer thriller, from manila, and he has diabolical plan, and if they don’t fit in to it, if they don’t, he will make them pay, and he tells them so!
He and he alone, is their rescue team, he and he alone is their savior now, and they will cooperate or as he promises, they will all die!
They must have shelter, he will have to provide them with shelter.
They must be fed, he will have to provide them with food!
They must become a survivor, learn to deal with inclement weathers, catch and eat creatures that move raw, sleep walking if need be, and kill or be killed, and to survive you need a teacher, an agile bitch, from the dark of the Force.
As a survivalist, he must provide them the tools and barbaric know, how to survive, and reciprocatingly, they must learn.
They must go back to the kindergarten of preditorial hunters.
Back, in time, back, in time, back, back, back in time. To do what must be done, natures fun, hard wired spectrum, and eat what ever it takes to survive.
The vegetarians will be eaten, by the fracta-carnivorians, their bones busted, broken into, and the warm red marrow licked out clean! It, is he who must teach them to see, how to live to survive the unearthly, in a world that is not what they think it is.
A world that is dead, destroyed, where only, where only, where only the strongest of the strongest, of the very strongest, survives!
This is nature’s fractal law. From two billion million human years ago! Before your kind walked the bottom of the liquid seas.
This matrix existed matter fractally in the time breeze.
[ 128 ]
Now, besides all of this, as if this wasn’t enough to deal with, under lying all of this is other combined force’s, superimposed on the realms of the ††DUCKS †† driven, driven with the ribbon of wild, brony, muscular exercises, manifesting behind the scenes of other worldly
They lie in wait. They too, have a time due!
So, much is simultaneously happening.
The stupid man, with, the stupid plan, with a bad head, tries to use it as best he can, ponder he does, then this?
How, do you take a people spoiled by modern
conveniences, and dump them back a million years back, back into prehistoric times. With no cars, no light, no electricity, no dentists, no tooth paste, no toilets, no perfumes, no computers, no running water, no TV, no baseball, no nothing?
BR knows!
But BR, also knows, it won’t be pretty!
It will be dam right bloody.
And he now, lifts the cover up, where the people are, and he holds it open and sticks his head in, and growls:
He growls at them: Shut up Bumble bugger bitches! Stop stinking or I’ll shut back the door.
Now try to imagine this, imagining, good, here’s the scene, people down in the bottom of a ship, cut off from the world, waiting to be rescued, when all of a sudden out of a hole in the ceiling, high above them, comes the voice of someone you think is going to rescue you, and he yells out loud :
BUMBLE BUGGERS, BITCHES, BUMBLE BUGGERS BITCHES!
Ha, ha, ha, I know, I know you Bumble bugger bitches are down there, ha, ha, ha! I can see ya! I can smell ya! What y’all, been doing? Hiding from BR? Ha, ha, ha, I can smell you, Oh ha, ha, ha, ha, You, you fools, you cannot, you can’t hide from me. I can always find bugs, you stink! You can’t hide from me, you bugs are kidding your selves! Not me, not me, not meeee. Ha, ha, ha,
I got the nose! He said pointing to his nose, three times, and laughing! Ha, ha, ha, oh Ha, ha, ha, . .
All I got to do, is just follow my nose, and sure as water is in the bottom of a well, buggers, bugs, are stinking up like hell. Oh ha, ha, ha, ha,ha, ha, oh ha, ha, ha !
I gone put you in the pot and stir it up, once, I gone put you in the pot and stir it up twice, that’s nice, three times four, till your done, Oh ha, ha, ha! Oh boy, this is gone be fun. ha, ha, ah!
I know what you stinking thinking? You want to come on out, don’t you?
Don’t lie? Don’t lie fly, ha, ha,ha!
You stink it’s time you come out? Is that what you’re stinking? Time to come out? Time to come out and join old BR in the sunshine, ha, ha, ha! What’s up bugger’s?
[ 129 ]
The demented BR, has open up a can of worms, when he found that hole in the ceiling!
But, let’s go back in time a minute.
Back before he opened the hole in the ceiling, shall we.
What was going on a couple of minutes, a couple of minutes before he came along, and found that yellow curtain covering a ceiling door!
It was dark down there.
Down there was nowhere where you would want to be.
Down there was the epitome of human’s misery.
Down there, sat death, next to thee, in the darkness with you, with you, next to you.
There in the darkness. And that darkness was. It was full of people, mostly dead, some alive, and dying.
It was eerie, it was lonely, it was hot, no ventilation, it was muggy, the humidity was suffocating the few folks that remained still breathing. It was icky, and sucky in any language!
In that huge space, that big spacious lunchroom, at least thats what it was, before, before the destruction of the world came, it use to be a luxurious cafeteria. The ,”happy eats,” was the name of the cafeteria room, which specialized in foods, for those blessed with a more sophisticated palettes and tastes!
[ 130 ]
People would sit casually while courteous waiters, with white gloves, would come around and serve you. It was a happy life. So flush, so very flush full of worldly amenities, and social graces pleasures, great conversation, great wonderful people! One could not ask of life for more, then, then, then in the last days.
Then destrux-fracto-actional bifurcation, of transformations of doom time, suddenly happened, and what was a world, is no more.
It change it did, it changed, changed in to a slummy worm filled cemetery of black death. It only took and instant. Only! If you break down an instant, into slow motion, it appears to be a year, but, if you close your eyes and open it, then and there, death is staring at you, just like that. Matter of fact.
In an instant, there was a loud scary rumble, upheaval, an apocalypse of earthquaking tremendous, crashing horrible sounds, of the boats interior structures splitting up, breaking, as large shaking walls, went shaking wildly, into convulsions, burst apart, buckling collapsing ceilings and tons of broken glass, and tons of machinery came crashing down through the ceilings, down, down on the heads of people, seated eating their last meals, as the lights suddenly went out, as the lights went black, as life went black, crushing, killing and mangling un-apologetically all of the diners, save for a very few.
Now, the lunchroom is destroyed, dust filled, thick air, the big mighty ships air conditioners dead, and most of its support walls have caved in, it has no electricity here, it has no waiters, only the squashed remains of them, looking like red jam you spread with a knife on white bread, along with hundreds upon hundreds of people, crushed by fallen ceiling debris, and now they litter the floor rotting, not pretty.
Amongst the dead are here and there are scattered survivors.
Now days afterwards,
[ 131 ]
They having been, laying there, laying, waiting, dying, crying, sobbing, without life’s basics!
No water to drink.
No running water to wash them selves, wash and clean their wounds.
No light see, no way to walk around accept stumble around in the dark walking on the faces of dead people, from different places,
who were alive!
Who a short time ago, were happy!
Who dead now be! What misery! Life contains, uncertainty comes and wains, but, nothing is so final, like the finality of death. It’s lips are pretty one minute and ugly the next!
Once in a while, you hear a breather, yes a breathing live being, laying amongst the thousands.
Some times you hear screams.
It hurts your heart to hear them, the little one, the innocents, the children, Mommy, Mommy help, mommy!
Some times you hear a poor souls scream [ hyperboles of obscenities at god ]
[ 132 ]
Some times, you with your stomach empty, hear it growling, growling for a morsel. But wo, be onto you, none, no, no more food for you to eat!
Some times, you hear the last exhalation of a neighboring body next to you as it expires, alone, quiet, still, dead!
[ 133 ]
Dead, dead equates to the eternal quietness. It is quiet, quiet, so quiet, but in here, in here, here in this room, this cafeteria of death. You, you can hear things. You can hear. Beings making sounds! Beings and the parts of beings, making sounds in the dark without light! Sometimes the being making the sounds are, sometimes the sounds are coming, coming, from the interior of you. But, you have to be in tuned, tuned in to it!
Harmonically to hear, hear the sounds of your body! So, many, many, there are the electrical sounds of anxiousness of the co dependent, inter cooperative, series cycles mega fluxes, of the nervous systems sounds, of inter-frictional frequency sounds, In side your brain to the nervous systems tributaries of nerve branches and back in a flash, as they sporadically send signals to the centers of your brain to minds interfaces, warning them that death is at hand.
Then of course there are mundane easy for anyone, to hear sounds. Sounds you can hear easily.
Some times, you hear you, breathing!
You can gasps, somebody is gasping and its you! This the most strangest of the most beautiful sounds, you make when you inhale, and exhale, inhale and exhale. It doesn’t hurt, and because you don’t need anything else, except this noise, to tell you, yes you are still alive here in this boat!
And another important set of sounds thats is incredible,
is the olfactory employment ones? In here in the dark, there loafs, soft drifting air full of Oder’s emanating from your private parts. You try to ignore it. But the sound of your nose smelling is like certain words that press and trigger your buttons!
[ 134 ]
How do you smell?
How do you smell after being down in this boat, without hope, without washing off, both wet and dried blood in hell?
When you smell, your nose makes a sniff, sniff, sniff, sounds, that abounds sifts out the fresh scents, the pleasing ones, and those coming from you that are , that are not! Butts fart’s in the air, where gases of despair, drift into your nostrils, not just diagonally, but you gets hot weighted smells, that float higher, than the cool ones, that tend to drive down drifting near the floor where you are. Where you are! Funny thing about the gases in you! For them to fart, come out of you, they come out of you either way, one part of you or the other, you don’t have to be alive! You’re going to fart dead or alive! Dead or alive, in here you are!
Where you will be for a long time! A very, very long time!
Your nose is fearful, if not, frightened by your, your, yes, we don’t like to say it, we dare not say it, but, the quality of foot odor is often reported as a thick, cheesy smell. Some describe the smell like that of malt vinegar. However, sometimes your foot can give off a strong ammonia-like olfactory dis treasure, smell, that can make a hairy goat on fire, float!
[ 135 ]
So many, many sounds in the dark! So, many!
When you rest your head on your arm, when you’re on the floor of the ship, you can hear the sounds of your heart throbbing, going, thump, thump, thump. Thats, the over arching supreme sound, the heart in your chest. It also tells you, you are alive. There is only darkness, no light now, in this place, your heart, or your life.
When will you die?
Will you die of starvation?
Will you die of thirst?
Cause there is no water in here!
Will you die because the infestation by the billions of little white maggots eating your flesh off your face and eating out your eyeballs?
Crawling in and out of nose, as the flies buzz around your head making you dizzy with the sounds of their wings, is that what awaits your fate?
[ 136 ]
What awaits your fate is not up for debate. You’re here and now is. But, you ask, here, what is here ?
How is here, here?
How is here?
Here?
Can you touch it?
Can I eat it?
Can I be sure I am here ?
Can I be sure of anything?
Am I like mad? Am I like BR, so mad it’s pitifully sad?
BR, asks in the deep corridors of his twisted mind, who is in there?
Who is in my mind? Why the pejorative symbioses between the times sublime and pandemoniums, cycles landscapes in his minds demeanor, cleaner or dirtier than most or are we, who are wrong? Confused, used by popular morays of our times, your time, for taking for granted popular non thinking public perceptions, what it is meant by the real here? Here is here, but because it is said, does it make it so? Here in this context, mathematically, you have to go to the mathematics to translate an approach to the facts of here.
[ 137 ]
We describe here, with a perceived landscape construct, composed of a finite space, with dimensions on an assumed grid, with a boundaries both vertical and horizontal, and within the center, we place our eye. And
lookup and discern a ceiling, look-down and discern a floor, identified by which we think, we are standing, and thus, rationalized it as fact? We are here?
BR, equates things other than him self, as infestations, which to him equates to bugs coalescing inside of a { 1 }.
In his mind because you are, doesn’t mean you are. Because you speak doesn’t mean what you think it means.
Your words you speak to him, in his mind, are not given to instantaneous translatability and hold little or no weight in his reality.
Just as the rain or wind blowing on him. It may be environmental to you, but!
[ 138 ]
It’s just sensation on his skin, and sensation, does not a fact make, for fact sake! But it is not a fact, or proof of your existence to him. You in his mind, you cannot be proof of your existence. You are because you say you are, is not good enough to be a fact, in the eyes of BR’s reality!
His is a mind froth with mind distortions, described as without consistent underlying logic, but randomized infrequent loops on the outskirt peripheries of primal wired animal instinctive regions of levels of logic, but logic of the other, the dangerous kind. And cunning wise, whether by deceit, evasion of the truth, just to survive with him. He has no hesitancy to kill, in fact to him, when he is in one of his mad stupors it’s a trill!
But, what we know, we don’t, as we’ll soon find out about BR, whose mind is vulnerable to being captured in the future, when the, †† DUCKS †† arrive on the scene like in a dream!
And for now, until proven other wise we accept here. The, here inside this boat as a fact, and the lives of the people, as a fact, and realities in that awful ship you find your self in, as what awaits your fate? Fate, rummages around laughing, in the belly of the beast. The beast in this place is this ship, only a couple of dozen people, got away with their life, and bodies intact, only to face destitution, humiliation and the horrible conditions living in the bottom of the boat of death. Practically all the other people, got instantly smashed like a bug.
[ 139 ]
Those lucky ones, the few that didn’t get crushed, survived, now sit in the blackness, alone and are now rightly, worried and deeply troubled waiting.
Life and death, It all depended on luck.
In this cruise ship, some parts of the huge atrium like cafeteria, caved in, some parts, the floor gave way, and smashed their bodies down flat, flat like hay. Luck?
Of course, the reaction of those, still alive, were to seek confirmation from love ones, that they too, survived, but disappointingly, they, in most cases, did not!
And those that did, roamed around in the darkness, in the big room, on their feet, if they could, on all fours, if too weak, and crawling, with their hands held out in front of them, searching in the pitch blackness, walking or crawling on the dead bodies of others, their faces, eyes, and backsides, till tired, depressed, they fall, and collapsed down, near somebody else! They would listen so they could tell by their sounds, who was alive and who was not. What would you prefer to lie down next to, someone alive, or a dead guy?
And made spontaneous instantaneous friendships. Friendship? Friend?
[ 140 ]
What, a strange word. Do you have a friend?
Some people only have themselves.
No children. They got money, but they can’t talk to it.
They can’t ask it, to help them in the dark of this boat?
They would give it all away to be any place but here!
But where is here?
Due to time, and the attributes of time, if you understand , you are in here, and after you move away from here, someone will be standing where you are right now, in a different time, and a different environment, but at the same time they will be occupying the space you are occupying.
Its simple, take a tree for example, a tree, sweet as can be, is born an apple tree, form its branches falls an apple onto the ground.
The wind, the animals,
the humans, squirrels, worms collect the apples,
till all are gone, and next season, the tree drops another apple in exactly the same spot, and more until they too, are all gone.
The boundary-less cycle is one attribute of the arc of a fractalized time loop.
Time, separates time. The time of the happy apple tree, and the time of the happy people in the boat, as opposed of the un-happy people in the boat be, is separated by time. And those unique degrees of separations, Is all about luck and about time variations.
[ 141 ]
And finding a friend, in a hell hole is all about conditional, contest, and circumstantial luck, and if the friend turns out to a real friend, and not an opportunistic one. It’s like finding gold! And finding a friend anywhere can be tricky, and in here more so, than anywhere on the two Earths!
In here, in this time, it can mean the difference between staying alive a little longer, improving the quality of the time you have remaining, or a few more minutes or going insane, plain and simple in time.
If you realize inhere, one would try to get near another live person, to share the pain and to help each other survive somehow. If not physically than with words of hope, and words of encouragement, small talk. After all it’s been a long time now, and after a time, a person, any person sitting in the heat, it’s humid, yucky, no air, their brains stops working correctly. They stop working correctly!
They get desperate.
Desperate!
People start to hallucinate! They get very easily annoyed, impatient. They get agitated, the person gets so angry, frustrated and slowly changes in their personality, rise to the surface. And the person is not the same anymore.
Not, the same, any, anymore!
These few people. Some of them, stay next to their dead loves ones, near their bodies hoping against hope that somehow some way, some rescue team will find their way down here in the dark.
They hope against hope!
Some won’t leave the side of their dead love ones, no matter what. Others, they, draw closer together in small pockets, small clusters of the living, and when they have the strength they speak to each other, they do. The subjects, the same, always the same. We are going to die, soon, if nobody comes. Says one, sobs a voice, crying, crying.
Crying, in the dark.
[ 142 ]
The voice belong to young lady name Judy. if it wasn’t completely black in here, you could see
she’s young and pretty, a recent college grad, that got this cruise ship ticket from her proud parents, as gift and enticement for her to do good in school and finish college. She did, and now she’s here in time. She, thinks to her self, if you ask me how I am doing? I’d lie, and say I am doing fine. How can I be doing fine, thinks the woman after being asked by another woman, how you making out?
She, thinks about that question.
Any other time, she would answer quickly but now, she’s laying down on the floor feeling her bare legs for maggots that are crawling every where. She’s horrified of them. She can feel them.
She knows what they look like.
What is strange is when feel one crawling on you nose near your eye and you pick it up, it is so soft and rubbery, so innocent, that how they feel but then you get horrified doubly when you know what they are hungry for?
They’re tiny. Very, small. Their white, and look like a tiny white caterpillars, but worm like. Looking like tiny crawling worms, Worms, that feast on you if your dead or not..
When she gives up, and that might be soon, they will eat her too!
And she won’t be able to stop them, she won’t be able to do anything, she’ll be dead!
It won’t matter.
[ 143 ]
It’s so hard for me says, the young woman, thinking to her self.
A couple of days ago, I was thinking of getting buff for summer, beach ready, thinking about boys, music, fun, and now. I don’t. Oh,my God! NOW!
Strange how in one day you’re whole life gets thrown in the garbage. I haven’t eaten.
I haven’t eaten, and I probably will never again! If, if, shucks, If my girls friends , if my friends saw me now, OMG. If they saw me, so down and out and smelly and filthy! If they saw me, me, now, they’d pity me, they’d say Judy girl, thats my nick name, Judy girl, they would say, we are so sorry this happened to you, you of all people, don’t deserve this, and it true! I don’t!
Who the hell deserves this, I don’t want to die like this. The dead people that are dead, already, they got it better than me, shit!
What the hell do I got to live for?
I will never have any babies, I don’t know what being a mother feels like.
I don’t know what marriage is like, I am too, too, young to die! There can’t be a god, OMG! There can’t be one, this can’t be, this can’t be happening!
Dam, Goddam, I curse this cursed, blighted, despicable life, and I wish I was dead! Judy, said and broke down in tears, sorrowfully thinking to herself, there is no hope for us who are still breathing the smelly stinking air in here! We’ll never get out, no, nobody even cares! Hoping is, is an indulgence for fools. I want to be dead, so badly!
[ 144 ]
So, this is really a sad, very sad set of situations, said Judy. I feel so lost, I feel like I am lost. Totally!
I am, so out of it, gosh, you know, I,
I wish that my dad was here. He’d know, he’d know what to do, she said softly, her voice filled with emotion, and deep concern as she started crying.
Well, this is not exactly pretty situation, for none us honey, chimed in another, more mature sounding female voice in the dark.
You could tell by the way she was speaking, she seemed to know what deep pain, and sorrow was all about.
We’re done! Said another ladies voice, flatly without feeling, direct and cold, as if there were no chance of anything getting better for them.
To an observer, it’s interesting the way men act in this a situation like this, they seemed to have paired off by themselves, in these weird circumstances. And like wise, the few woman that are alive, also were drawn to each other, crawling over on their hands and knees over the dead bodies so they could be in close proximity with one another. I tell you, exclaimed Judy sounding so depressed you, you could her heart felt sorrow in her trembling voice.
Well, I want to die, I need one of you to do it. I want you help me kill my self, cause I don’t got the guts to do it!
You don’t! But, what makes you think I got the guts to kill, you? Look, you really won’t be killing me, you know! You’ll just be, you will be helping thats all! Its different! Judy girl, she said calmly, feeling better already. It’s not even that, its, that she just might get and persuade somebody to end this madness!
Girl, you are so full of it, said a girl in the dark, skeptical.
She bugging, snapped another, harshly.
No, I am not, I mean yes, a little,said Judy girl,
A, a little?
look!
No, you look, you know what, you all are getting me more dam depressed that I already am, with talk,shucks,the lady remarked angrily!
Yet another said, you guys are nuts!
Said one woman. Its that you got to put your self in the profits hands, they will save us!
Year right, said one voice in the pitch blackness.
They have done enough already, I think!
Soon the women were arguing, then Judy girl, turned around, and faced in the direction of the voice closes to her, in the dark, feeling this one just might do it!
Enough, enough already!
Listen, she said lowering her voice down and talking directly where she think the other girl is!
First try to understand, I am a coward, a big scaredy cat. Always was one. And always will be! I can’t take this.
I am afraid I lose my mind Gerry, Gosh, really, really Judy girl?
Thats what I am saying!
But, said Gerry, But, interrupted Judy, hysterically, But, nothing I got to be realistic, shucks, just as ain’t light in here, ain’t no life left for me to continue!
Honey, said Gerry, trying to calm the highly agitated girl down,
Judy, you should try to hang in, sooner or later they might gone send in somebody, some peoples, some rescue peoples! Sugar, listen, said Judy, big cruise ships like this, when they go hit something or crash into something, get in trouble in the ocean and they sink, we are not underwater, this boat ain’t sinking. If it was, we would know it by now, don’t you think?
I means shit, we’d be all dead, every last one of us, no, I don’t know happen, But it was something big, an apocalypse atomic war or something, maybe worse.
The boat is practically stand up on one side and it, ain’t in the water cause it an’t moving around in the slightest!
[ 145 ]
The phones don’t work, the internet is down, outside the boat is probably radioactive, shit! I am going crazy waiting to die, I want it now, please help me, I can’t stand the stress, it’s killing me, but not fast enough, I’ve got to take action, action, understand me? I’ve got take action, in my own hands,
because, because, I don’t want to, and I can’t, I can’t continue anymore,
I can’t any more! I am sorry, Gerry, my english sucks when I cry and am very upset.
Do you happen to speak any french? Oui, a little bit, answered Gerry! When I am over excited, said Judy girl, and terribly stressed out like this, I , I, I have trouble expressing my self well, in english, thats why, I asked, I got raped in side of here. No! Oui, sister!
Quelle? What ? No! A guy laying in the dark, amongst the dead bodies, got up and jumped me, he did it. Man are shitting animals! You got that right, said Gerry. The son of bitch, raped me, he ,Oh My God! It was so scary!
Oh mon dieu! You want me to tell you, tell how, how it happened? You’re not going to believe this!
He caught me by surprise. In here? In here, on the floor, in the pitch blackness of this dam boat. Shit! He got me.
I was lucky, to find something, that, that, that knife on the floor. In the dark! I was lucky! The knife saved me. While, he was on me. I picked it up and jabbed it into his heart!
He touched my nipples and that’s only for my
husband, and my babies, it’s sacred to me, not no one else, so I killed him, she said sobbing uncontrollably!
I know we don’t have any light in here, but if you could see me, you would see his blood is all over me. I smell of death, that is why, I want you help me to commit suicide! I can’t live any longer!
[ 146 ]
Oh Mon Dieu.
C’est terrible! That is unbelievable. So will you help? NO!
Pourquoi, pourquoi? Why won’t you help me kill my self, I must die, I am going mad, mad, I tell you, please, she yelled pleadingly and crying uncontrollably! I loosing my mind I tell you, Please. Sob, sob. I, I cant take this living like this. It is too, to much. My God, No, I am sorry, I am sorry to bother you, I said sorrowfully as I thought to myself, I can’t take it any more of this stuff, I tried everything, I pleaded with her, but she told me no!
Then, suddenly behind me came another female voice, a person who, some distance away, was over hearing our conversation, and apparently, she understood the whole conversation and said, Hey, look, I couldn’t help but listen in, and my name is, Saddie McQueen.
I’ll help you kick the bucket, if thats what you want, she chuckled, its, like what ever to me.
Same to me, you understand. I seen better days too. I was startled, thought Judy to her self, but, this person, this girl, understood where I was coming from, and, was all right about it, and besides that, she was cheerful about it too!
[ 147 ]
And her personality in her voice, in the dark was telling.
She seemed willing, and I was so desperate, so I trusted her!
So, I explained to her, how I want to do it, she laughed at me, at first, and I had to admit. The way I wanted to try committing suicide, well, Hmmm, it did sound goofy but, I think it would work. If I put my mind to it real hard, I am California girl, after all! And, OMG, so much for the coward type.
So I explained what I wanted her to do, real real slowly, I will hold my breath, I said, and she will hold my nose so I can’t breathe, and thats it. No air, and its over, I said, staring at darkness where I thought she was!
Trying my darn’est to be cheerful, too.
Surprisingly, the woman, who was showing how upbeat, and how spunky she was, answered daringly, you know something, she said, let’s make it a two-some,
you hold my nose.
I hold your nose.
Get it?
I hold my breath, you hold your breath, and if it works, If, and that’s a big if?
We’ll both be out of our misery. Voila, We’ll be, both deader than a battery, I told her, and just hearing her willingness, made me feel better about it.
Anyway, I said, so might as well give it try, What ever, she said, very non challantly, apparently not giving a dam one way or the other!
With your idea, we get two for one, kind of buy one, get one free american style ha, ha, ha. She laughed and it was her laughter that made feel much better about trying it, and I said, very efficient, er, “très effiecient ?” What do you think?
[ 148 ]
Very efficient things are concurrently happening simultaneously in life, unknown to you and me, it is knowledge of it, that means the difference, blessed is he, who sees it.
Dark has atmosphere. The atmosphere of a lark, is serendipitously happenstance. The atmosphere of the dark, is a pessimistic precursor, of the coming of the end, for those fore-lorned souls, in the bottom of this boat.
So, it was desperate survivors, heavy with melancholy, cloaked in perpetual blackness of one of the ships large dining areas, must come to the realization, that they only survived one calamity, to then, suffer another, that epitomizes the most dreadful of inhuman conditions, encompassing them, totally in unspeakable humiliations, before their final sad demise.
There in the dark, they ponder the futility, articulate imponderables.
The two, young women, Judy Champagne, and Saddie McQueen exalt themselves to take their own lives, as a remedy to end the blighted decrepit hand, they have been dealt.
Each of the girls, holds tight the nostrils of the other, affirming, they would rather die, die then breathe another drop of this air in here.
They are in throws of asphyxiating themselves, and ironically at the exact same time, mother nature is playing another one of her playful and nasty ironies. She has timed things just right, so that BR, is going to open up the hole in the ceiling above them and announce his coming!
So, then now their fates are fractally crisscrossed, as the cross winds driven by the culprits of probabilities occurs. They are dying, they begin to faint, die any second now . They will be dead. And, it will happen any second now. Perhaps ten seconds, they will be dead! 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, then BR, opens the ceiling up at the count of two, and says ;
Hello, BUMBLE BUGGERS, BUMBLE BUGGERS!
[ 149 ]
Ha, ha, ha, I know, I know you bumble bugger bitches are down there, ha, ha, ha! What y’all,
been doing? Hiding from me, Big Rex, My friends call me BR? Ha, ha, ha, I can smell you, Oh ha, ha,, ha, ha, You, you fools, you cannot, you can’t hide. I can always find bugs, you stink! You can’t hide from me, you bugs are kidding your selves! Not me, not me, not meeee.
I got the nose!
All I got to do, is just follow my nose, and sure as water is in the bottom of a well, buggers, bugs, are stinking up like hell. Oh ha, ha, ha, ha,ha, ha,, oh ha, ha, ha !
I gone put you in the pot and stir it up, once, twice, thats nice, three times four, till your done, Oh ha, ha, ha! Oh boy, this is gone be fun. ha, ha, ah!
I know what you stinking thinking? You want to come on out, don’t you?
Don’t lie? Don’t lie fly, ha, ha,ha!
You stink its time you come out ? Is that what you’re stinking? Time to come out? Time to come out and join old BR in the sunshine, ha, ha, ha!
[ 150 ]
Whats up bugs?
So, it is as we see them, these poor victims of debased fate, there they are, who are about to die just as he opens us the hole in the ceiling just in time!
The two ladies and the rest of the survivors, are pleasantly surprised and blinded by the bright lights of the flash lights in the dark, that suddenly seem to pump them up with irrational exuberance, unapologetically harolding them to come back from the brink, it would be remissive of them, now, not to entertain the fleeting certainties of hope and to embrace the possibilities of the elusive sacred aspirations of rescue!
Stay tuned here comes Chapter 7.
chapter 7
The Tweets of Madcow Sammy
BAD PERSONALITIES
BIG REX
Chapter 7
[ 151 ]
Unbenounced to them, their savior in the hole in the ceiling, is madman without feelings, his mind is beset with farcetities and bouts of self-aggrandizement leading down the roads of madness, seething with pervasive obsessions, tugging at him, sometimes to do good, sometimes the opposite, with the vengeance of a mad God, out of hell. Pray tell, absorption, with himself, first, second and thirdly, and lastly bastardly! His Name is none other , than Big Rex!
And below, the anxious people were trilled!
So happy to hear a voice, a voice of somebody from the outside, so happy to see him, but are shocked at the man up in the tiny hole in the ceiling, who is screaming angrily at them now, ranting craziness at them.
Was it a mirage, was he imagined, was he real,
or demons unleashed, unsealed, were they seeing and hearing things?
They listened to him in total dis-belief.
He doesn’t seem tobe real. He can’t be real, he looks real, but his words? He doesn’t make any sense.
But they continue to hope exasperatedly for his help.
Hoo’ ray, cheers happily one voice in the crowd down below in the blackness. An audacious woman in the dark standing up a top the belly of a dead man and simultaneously trying to keep her balance, as she has to bends her neck all the way back, straight back, and look up vertically, at the guy who at first appears to be a homeless nut, in the ceiling.
She, has her face facing up to his, as the light from his flash lights shines down, making it impossible to see his face!
Her mind is overwhelmed, as it is shaky, after, after being down here so long, so long down here in the dark like a rat!
Her mind now, it’ no good either, it’s flakey! She is overwhelmed by her misery, it’s fuzzy, almost, no, not almost but dizzy fuzzy and more, and totally dazed by the suffocating heat and stench! Heat. Stench! Heat! Stench! Hard for her or anyone laying down in the blackness, smelling themselves, reduced to the lowest state of a human being can go.
The overwhelming heat trapped in it,
The overwhelming, stench, trapped in it.
The overwhelming, death, trapped in it,
and she can’t take it,
can’t take it any more,
[ 152 ]
Her mind unsettle, lofts into fraudulent delusionary rants, seemly merging with his brash, belligerent unorthodox lunacy! They’d make a pair, you could say! Put them both away! Craziness is a mental manifestation, reflecting disconnection with accepted norms, isolated risk aversions, and disproportional disorientational aspects, of the thinking mind behaviors, and this confusions, this lunacy is, shared easily in commonality, when people are greatly overcome by stress, and she and he appear to be both screwy too! As they both succumb into the surreality of their situation unfolding second by second.
You can sense the under lying sub girded mental states of exasperation, between the man high up in the ceiling looking down, and the woman in the black hole below! And reality’s tensions in their minds, and his, as their fates and destinies combined and criss cross, suddenly, unexpectedly!
It can happen, it can happen, certainly it can happen to anyone. Can’t it?
Where the other you, the you, inside you, that you, that you hide, because it’s the cut of you, you deny?
Let out not, you will. Arrested, guessed, It’s so bad, isn’t, it’s sad! Going some place? Some place dark?
There is a sphere of inner states thinking, inherited in the dynamic higher primal realms in your head, back from jungle times red, where lurks demons, essences of barbaric behavior, usually relegated for release by both female, male and child.
From time to time, it gets its chance, to romance free, in sun’s destinies sins! Purposely or whim?
It has a long way to run, when its set lose under earth sun. Let’s name it for what it is – Our inner personalities – Demons on the run!
[ 153 ]
Is true, truth : there, yes, there is a magnetism, for some to indulge in cruelty, to be proud to be cruel to the weak, self aggrandizement if what their ego seeks!
Is true, truth undeniable, and so are you! What you are. Animal, in you, be you!
If left unchecked, this line of crazy mentality, can spread just like a common cold.
The stakes are high, to tumble in and slip in an insanity trip, especially when you are stripped of your life, and suffer serious blows, faced with very uncomfortable, non solutions to choose from, if any?
Heat, hot, trapped in a boat, hot, a lot, to long, involuntarily singing deaths song, it, discombobulates the brain and makes it go insane. The mother of all fears is to lose your mind.
The mind, is a funny thing, it’s a vehicle,
it doesn’t blond to you-
you inherited it, you didn’t ask to.
Strip away off the boundaries of comfortable realities, and substitute that for states of the impossible. The mind seeks relief. Release! That’s what this young woman wants desperately.
When the man first was seen in the hole in the ceiling, the crowd, lit up with excitement!
Everybody screamed and was yelling out to him, praising his arrival some whose has come to rescue them,
but, it was long after that, it only took a second for them to get the picture! That, he was a nut! They dealing with mental ill, mad man,
and she, catching on quick, and knowing what was at stake, she said ; wait, let, let me, let me speak to him, and the others in the dark grew silent, And waited!
Moment, to moment, situations unfolding. All bad, except for this creature up above her, she wants out , she wants out. She is hungry to live, and although her mentally is in a state of utter shock, dazed she senses, this is her way out, this guy, this man, this crazy in the ceiling holding up the light. She doesn’t have a lot! Her charms, that’s it! In her voice, her quick wit, bad taste in her mouth she spits, just like a woman is suppose too!
But here, in the dark? She thinks, draws on a woman’s primal instincts, and know she has a gift of talk! And she will use as toll to get out! That’s what woman do! She knows what she has to do. So, She struggles to stand on the body of a man, so she can talk. Talk to him. Talk to him only the way she can!
You, you are going bail us out, right honey babe, she yells out to him? Throwing out a line to see if it will stick, and catch a fish!
You’ve come. Just in time. We thought the world forgot about us!
But looking at you I see that’s not true!
I am looking up to you, and I am so glad to see you, it’s like I am looking now at heaven.
You going save us, she says to him, questioningly?
She is tired, but the fact that she thinks she will be saved, gives courage and strength, gives her a cautious feeling, a feeling she would’ve of only found as an adrenaline rush, to realize, to really realize, you are about to escape out of here,
and what that means! Freedom! Hope! Life!
But, then she needs to employ her female psychology, and female eruditism.
[ 154 ]
I like bugs, are you a bug?
You Goddam right honey!
Can you get me out of here?
Can a shark eat meat, ha, ha, ha!
Only if it is sweet, replies the girl cunningly, with overlays of sexual overtones, implied un abashedly in the sounds of her voice. The other women stay silent, aware of her game plan!
I like em bitter too! BR, tells her!
I got a big mouth, so, I like them too, ha,ha, ha, laughs the girl!
BR, is taken aback by the bitch in the black, but not vexed, and shines the light down on this woman, and spy’s her keenly, smiling, his curiosity aroused and other things too, intrigued he be, at the naughty, sassy lass, down in dark!
[ 155 ]
She says to him, as her eyes squint in the dark trying to avoid the beam of the flashlight he has in his hand and go passed that and see his face. She says in a softer voice now, in a lower tone to it, a personal tone. I know you are joking. We are not bugs. We want to be free! Help us please!
Will her please have any measurable impact on him?
She slowly opens up her mouth and yells up to him. She’s green eyed, cute,
covered in mud, young in her twenties, her hair is blond, it’s
what she has. You can still, tell, despite all the mountains of dark, black caked up mudblood, and filth in it.
She is tiny, plump woman with her breast exposed, covered by a light white bra, that needs to be put in the washing machine desperately, only thing there are none in the world.
But, she’s a girl!
A shirt, covers her shoulders, a long pink shirt, with pinstripes that is open, showing her drooping chest, dripping wet with a myriad of strange stains of blood and mixtures of black waters laying in thickening puddles, with the hundreds of dead bodies down there. Her shirt, its worn out side her blue jeans. She got one shoe on her feet, and doesn’t look injured. Despite her ordeal she’s a feisty person, and guessing, one would guess, washed up, and bathe so you can see her, , one might guess her ethnicity to be?
Perhaps, polish american, or a mixed Irish american, or something like that, hard to tell in the dark, with
the only the light of shaky flashlight. One ear, her right one, she got a long earring in it, the other ear has nothing. Her face, although
filthy, is still, and although smeared in mud-blood, pretty, and is devoid of any remains of makeup. Her lips, lipstick-less, and smirking. Her voice shrill cool, loud, direct, pretentiously brave, her words insightful, powerful, telling. Her mind, her mind, whats left of it, reveals it is covered in the thick psychological funkiness of fear down in the darkness below, as she converses with a madman, and she very well knows it.
It’s about time, somebody found us! What took you so long?
We are hungry, thirsty. Get us out now, please. I know by the way you’re talking you are drunk with happiness to be alive, just like me, just like us, but now make us happy too! And help us get out of here, man! Like we are so ready!
Are the ambulance’s doctors up there with you. She asked very curiously?
[ 156 ]
Then another woman, from the back stumbles walking on top of the decrepitness of the dead bodies,
as she too walks towards the light, but doesn’t speak, preferring to let the young girl speak!
One woman yells, out to him, in a loud voice, the tone of it, bares witness to the depth of her desperation.
Oh, help us, oh thank God, they’ve come, says another, woman, dazed but enthusiastically.
The lady, was thrilled, thinking she and everybody, will be finally rescued, but suddenly, the nice aspirations crashes with the reality of BR! She is met with harsh insulting words, that cut to the bone, the devils home!
Shut up, help my ass! Shut the hell up, screamed BR belligerently, like a rapid hound dog from hell, ringing in the bell of bad news!
More Goddam bugs. Bubble bugger bitches, just what I need more trouble. No thanks!
[ 157 ]
Please what are you saying, please help us? Where are, the police?
OK, Shut up, and listen up. Life outside this boat is destroyed. Life as you knew life is dead, no cops, I am the cops, no rescue I am your savior! You want to live, do what I say, or die! Die, down here where you are.
I will close back, the dam door and leave you, get it!
I swear, . . I ‘ll do it!
I didn’t come to save you! I don’t like bugs that look like you! You don’t, deserved to be saved, that’s why you down there, and I am up here Bumble Buggas Bitches!
I will not save you, your remains, as far as me is concerned can remain down there, Bugs!
All you Goddam buggers, can stay down there, stay down there, hugger, buggas, muggas, I don’t need you! Bumble bugger bitches, yells BR, with a tense voice full of hatred, demarcating clearly for them,
as a precursor of what fate might await! The tone, his tone, and it’s an intensity of raw, gaul in his voice, means he means exactly what he saying! Undeniably! Shocked, the people quiet down, silence fills the room, and they look up at him, wondering if this is some kind of act or are they living in a continuous nightmare or something! Or something worse than a nightmare? This, this can’t be, this cannot, cannot, not be happening – one of them thinks to herself, but it is!
So, what happens next is the investigator, BR, sizes up the situation and
decides he is going to let them know, who is their new boss now, whether they are ready or not, like or not,
this is what they got!
This it the way it’s going to be! He is coming! He decides to throw a rope down and over his shoulder, he has his tits in his bag, and his sword at his side, a bucket and his lanterns tied around his waist, as he descends down the rope, into the big black cafeteria of doom.
BR, left the masks upstairs, and is in his usual get up, and he looks unreal,
His long coat smudged in blood and filth, his cowboy hat, down tight on his head like a death cap.
His hair wet, and dangling there like seaweed, his face and beard blackened with mud,
He squints his eyes. He climbs down the rope sliding down and puts one foot down, Boom, it makes a loud splashing sound into a puddle of blood, on the floor, beneath his foot.
[ 158 ]
And as if on cue, he disengages mentally, from reality, and by the way he is walking demonstrates that in a way, that can only be best described, as a person being out of sync, time wise! He is in slow motion mode, real slow motion mode, imagine being in a crowd of people rushing in the subway and there’s one guy in there walking sauntered if not super slow, walking extremely slowly. So slowly, that the people around him, seem to fly fast past him, as if there weren’t walking, but driving cars at two hundred miles and hour!-zooming pass the slow motion guy like he is sanding still!
That’s him, not in a rush and walking his way, slowly but in control of time, night or day, his time, his way or the his way!
He is in time to his time, but totally out of yours, not this flavor of reality, time real world time wise! Knowing, full well, when he is done with what he must do, he will return to your time, by and by, but just not yet!
He places the white bucket down, and places the lantern on the floor, pulls out his shotgun.” Tits,” as he walks around wi
th his sword at his side. He walks extremely slowly, a few steps at a time. His appearance is ghostly, and blows your mind!
And as his foot comes down making contact, it makes a loud noise as if it weighed hundreds, and hundred of pounds, as if he was not a man but a demon! His eyes piercing, cold, keen looking back into the eyes of the unbelieving people, shocked, fearful people, before him sitting in dead stunned silence!
One man paying no mind to BR, ran up and started climbing quickly up the rope, Banga BOOM. BR shot a warning shot, and said,
Shop, Or I will shoot you!
You to get out of here. You got understand I am he man, do what I say, you will live another, isn’t that easy?
Easy to understand!
I will kill you! Do I need to explain more? Are you gone listen to me? If you gone listen to me, say I do, Other wise get off my [ freaking ] rope sucker! And when you speaking to me- when you speaking to man, call me boss!
MY name is Rex, BIG REX! BR, for short! Now get off my rope! And if you want to get on it, you ask me! But lets sure you understand, say I do
Brother, choice is yours!
The man climbed back down, but didn’t say I do. Banga BOOM, big shotgun blasted the man, throwing his perforated corpse back spinning several yards like a wet towel against the wall! It slid down limp to move no more!
[ 158 ]
BR shot him, and said, I didn’t hear, I say, I did not hear you say I do!
Now, seems some folks are hard of hearing. I say it again, I’ll make clear, you want out of here, when come up to me, come near me, you tell I do, meaning you gone do what I say. Before you touch that rope, you tell me I do, other wise you can stay her! That’s your choice, it’s quite simple!
now, here how we pull this off,
You know me. Now, I wanna know you, see! See that [ freaking ] bucket. Br, said, callously, casual, tossing his hand around and pointing to the big white bucket, sitting in the light of his flashlight!
Everybody looked, as is on a drug hooked, and stared!
Drop your ID’s in there, passports, any ID, you got. Tell me your name, said BR, in a serous tone, that sounded deathly!
Now BR, indeed, had come down with the big white bucket and told them, To all the bugs in here, let me make [ f***] clear! You got a mouth, use it! Don’t, boy, I say don’t, touch my Goddam rope, unless I tell you! And if y’all agree, you will be they all would be allowed to leave with me.
He told them, he would decide how many he would allow to leave, at a time, and in what order!
The first men he intentionally chose, by their identification cards! They we’re normal thin men! He chose to take up five thin men, and one chubby man! A Rabbi and a Priest, and Arabic Imam and a Hindu Priestess, and a Voodoo high baptist Minister of the Church of Africa, and a fat terribly, obese man, and he ordered the five thin men to help lift the big five hundred pound man named Noah, up the ropes. They struggled. So, he dropped many ropes and tied them around Noah’s big waist, and using five pulleys, and after about, twenty minutes, of arduous struggling, they successfully got him out.
They had no choice, in order to save themselves, BR had said they would have to rescue the big man first! Afterwards, he told the people left in the dark, they would be next, to be patient and wait their turn!
And he would return with water and bring them out too! He closed back the hole in the ceiling, and told the men that he took out, to go to the right, and they will find a bathroom, to and wash themselves spanking clean! To take off their dirty clothes and rapt themselves in the clean clothes of red and yellow curtains that were dry, he brought, which he cut up in big towel sizes, with his sword.
They went in the bathroom and were amazed that up here on the deck above, the lights were on and he told them, to wash themselves and they did, and then he told them to dry themselves in the red curtains and told them, there were strips of of towels to rap around their heads to blind fold themselves. At first they objected cynically, till he explain its purpose, that made them happy!
He wanted them to put on the blind folds on, so he would take them to his secret hideout, with lots of money, in the ship, where he was going make them rich, by giving them bars of gold, so they could start a big church in the world outside! So, the men listened and put on blind folds cause, he didn’t want them to know where the gold was hidden and he, led them along on a rope and they followed BR.
[159 ]
It took awhile, but!
He led them down to to big black room, and opened the door, and led them inside and once they were all inside, he slammed the door shut, and turn on the air-condition freezer settings to the freezer, to well below 32º degrees down to 0, so they would freeze.
The men inside the freezer suddenly,
felt the rushing gust of cold freezing wind on they’re freshly bathed skins,
and so alarmed took off the blind folds realizing they’re in a big industrial freezer!
They looked in the front of the room and there they saw the freezer door was shut, and it had a small square shaped portal glass window shaped like a door!
And they looked out and on the other side of the glass was BR looking in on them trapped inside.
They pounded on the door and pleaded for him to open it. But, the man looking at them in the window showed no reaction. As if he could not hear them.
To him the sounds they were making were just sounds.
Sounds were a sensation in his ears, to BR, a sensation, didn’t mean to much, because it didn’t prove anything, and if it didn’t prove anything it did not exist! He watched and watched as they went into the cold stages of death by freezing!
Interesting he thought, people bodies reach a stage where there is a point of no return, that comes! No return at all! This typically occurs during moderate to severe hypothermia, devolving to extremes, as the person becomes disoriented, as the body freezes, their mind plays tricks on them.
The brains, of these poor trapped souls, effected by extreme cold, it is abused, confused, and these men, once frustrated and angry, they turn on each other as their stress levels and raw emotions take over, they wind up fighting and are now irrationally, combative with each other.
The big man pushes the little man, the little man pushes the other man, The big man pushes around everybody like rag dolls. Rag dolls, in a doll house, and it was a mouse that tricked them to go inside.
They begin discarding their towels, that they were using as clothing, which, only increases the rate of heat loss in their bodies.
[ 160 ]
Why do people who are about to die by freezing do this?
Victims of hypothermia have been subjected to weird mental effects, thats what a cold-mind, to brain, to body, induced malfunction of the hypothalamus, the part of the brain that regulates body temperature can do! It is powerful too! When extreme cold take place, it shrivels up, and can’t think straight, any more, and you begin doing things, things you never would do.
Another explanation, is that the muscles contracting peripheral blood vessels, become exhausted, known as a loss of vasomotor tone, and relax, leading to a sudden surge of blood and heat to the extremities of the hand an feet, fooling the person into feeling they are hot, and getting hotter, and are overheated, when they are not.
The Hypothalamus brain is doing its job!
[ 161 ]
You in this situation, think it is warm, too warm, and begin to undress yourselves! But, you are inside the freezer, but despite that your brain has gone insane, only thing keeping it all together is the upper stages of the mind, which cannot feel pain or cold but is aware, very aware, the vehicle it is residing in, is under a death threat.
And it sends signals that you are too ho
t, you are compelled to think, you must take off your shirt, your pants, your under clothes. You want to be naked, so you can feel cooler, but, you are fool now, fooling yourself into undressing yourself! And, an ice cube, you would soon be, undoubtably!
The medical term, the Doctors refer to this is ,”Paradoxical undressing!”
BR, watches them as they descend downward pass,” The Paradoxical undressing,” stage, and go into the next death brain stages, they retreat into the corners of the freezer, and cling to the walls, and sit in the corners, bend over trying to hide or to dig into a hole, to burrow down like a squirrel in the ground, in order for the last vestige of, ” the Brain,” to manifest at the behest of mind, before it dies, to carry out, The Primordial Directive!”
To do all it can do to survive! It is one of the Fractal Laws of the Specie!
[ 162 ]
Burrow down, burrow down into the dirt from whence you came, and hide from he who comes, and hide from death!
This last stage of the freezing process, you’re going through, is called the burrowing, or the,” Terminal burrowing.” In this stage, You will now, seek a section, or spot to squat, a little place, a litter territory, to dig hole into, to get out of the terminal cold!
The men, now seek a little corner of the freezer they can call their own. And after each conner has someone sitting on it, and as they shiver to death, bone cold flesh, turns to rock hard mesh, and finally they enter Ice cube-land! A place you don’t want to be!
After that your an ice cube! He watched them freeze, the cold did as he pleased. Then smiling, decided to leave.
He came back to the hole and let the rest of the people out, both the old and the young including children, and he told them to used the bathroom and clean them selves good and that, they could use the dry red and yellow curtains, that he had ripped up for them, as towels, and could fashion clothes from it, by just wrapping them around their waist, in hast because he wanted to take them out side, as soon as possible, too!
The people complied, and so began the arduous long in coming, exit from the ship of doom.
They climbed the long ropes, helping each other, pulling each other up. Helping each other using the pulleys, and with the help of the flashlights,
level after level, deck after deck they climbed up and out.
BR, went got the little doggies.
He had tied to a pole, got a couple of jugs of water, and boxes of food, went and surprised the men waiting so long for him to return.
The demented Captain Andronikos, and also, the sceptic young scientist, named Jonathan, and together, he led them all out of the ship to salvation.
And dawn of a new life on the two Earths had begun.
[ 163 ]
Well, sir, took awhile, a good long while, climbing out safely I did it. Got the buggers out! All climbing out safely, was a miracle too. Cause, most of these folks are as about athletic, as a eyeball-less couch potato. Dam sure, wasn’t easy but Luckily I got the whole bunch of them out, and brought them up stairs. Now, as expected, we had some trouble with the captain. He was suffering from post traumatic stress syndrome, or flash backs, or heart attacks, or this or that, or something. I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know shucks, I ain’t, no dam Doctor! But, we made it all the way back, and I took them down to my camp!
On the way, I told the grown-ups to take of the young-in’s, and to stay there, while Jonathan and I, got some of them to bring up more stuff out of the boat! We went down and got some of the bags of stuff, water jugs and boxes of food, and equipment! We done got, loads of crap, but good crap, like, em, er, we had, er, almost a hundred of feet of heavy duty electrical extension cords, yes sir! And, shucks, we got super lucky, we even pulled out eighteen of those small potable refrigerators, they got in the rooms, out from the ship too!
Inside of six hours, we hog tied tired, but, we got up, and back out! We were all out side in the fresh air, setting up our new home out in the fresh, fresh air, Oh, boy thank God, for fresh air!
Dam it stink down there. Holy shit!
We got out, without a care, well almost none, nevertheless its so far seemed like it was going to be fun, I just hope I don’t got to kill no, one, thought BR to himself, cause bugs get out o line now and then ! We walked, and talked, and I saw the mens eyes light up, when my manJonathan, brought out a couple cases of liquors and beer, and sodas, that we found in the ship.
I prodded the old ships Captain, to open his mouth and yap and rap a bit!
Now, the Captain was a Greek dude, according to his papers, and all! Dude, was obviously, buggin, and in a bad shape, by the looks of him. He stretched out his hand shivering, and shake’in, and handed him a beer, and since I was gone be plenty busy fixing dinner, cause these buggers were begging me for something to eat. I figured, I get some of women folk, to help out!
I’d hook up the meats, and they could deal with the veggies, and serving the plates and water and drinks and all!
So, since most o them, was spread out all of the place.
I told Jonathan to get the mothers to bring the kids closer to the campfire, while I got the Captain to tell stories! Stories about, what he knew and things that happened to him. Well, sir, the old goat was still confused, and couldn’t tell a horse from car, but was pleasant enough! And, the guy, was walking around
with his hands behind his back, thinking! at least I hope he was thinking? I know the fish, was shocked, and baffled just like everybody! And I also noticed he was dressed same as before, and he did take a bath. This I have push him to do, later, if he was gone be around peoples!
This all was mind blowing, unreal for me and them too.
But shit what could do? Life, it is what it is, I thought to my self.
Anyway, while I was cooking I needed them to have something to focus their minds on, now that there ain’t no phones, No TV! No brain interface’in games, no 3D, shift shaping robot boys and girls, no augmented nothing!
But, as you can imagine, it was too much for every body! And a horrendous shock, and big time disappointment for those buggers, that I saved!
[ 164 ]
But, what hell, I did tell them the world was destroyed, so when they came out and saw, what I was telling them all along that their world, was totally destroyed, there was two earths one over their head. That alone, seeing it with own eyes, was enough to make you just shut-up and drop dead! But nobody did! Although the youngsters, children from about two to fourteen, about twelve of them did cry and cry, buckets of tears, and didn’t stop, but that was to be expected!
And this earth, the bottom, one they were living on, they would have accept it. Come what may, every Goddam day, and don’t look back, look towards the future yep, and that’s the way go, joe!
I now had to go about cooking dinner, and I asked Judy and Saddie, to help me prepare dinner too, I had brought up some of my special meats, from you know where, and had quite a task to do too!
And we set up a big pot, I got. And the ladies took one of jugs of water and some of the cans of soup I found and we boiled the meat first to defrost it, cause it was still hard as nails, cause I had just taken out a couple of my packed boxes of my special meats treats, and the stuff out of the secret freezer, then, they we roasted them bad boys up! There’s nothing like mouth watering, fried meat hot on the grill! Yep, it was barbecue sauce time, USA! America will come back another day!
Ya, hoo! Well, sir, we opened up a couple dozen cans of corn, peas, potatoes and string beans! Now, I know, when times are tough, rice is the thing, Rice is it man! That sucker, is easy to make, and will last a long, long Goddam time, and fills a cowboys belly right up!
So, I told the ladies, young and old, especially the grandma’s, to go crazy fixing up lots a rice. Lots of rice! So it will last us! And taste good and it’s nice!
And, they took a big pot, and boiled some rice over the fires! And this here latin chick, came up, smiling, her eyes looked like black eye peas. And introduced her self. Her name was
Maria, Boy, that girl, she looked goodddd! Body on that babe! And er, Maria, well, she hooked up a pot of rice and beans, puerto rican style! That baby was bad, bad! Them beans! Wo! Delicious! And, come sundown, around six o’clock. I guess? Cause we can’t tell, cause we don’t got no more watches, or house robots assistants to talk to! So, we spread out, what was left of that big old yellow curtain, we brought up, and we all sat down on the ground, around the campfire, to have our first big time dinnertime, all together, like little happy bugs!
One bug, er, I mean woman came up and said, we just want to thank you, from the bottom of our hearts BR.
You’re papa Big Rex, to us now! Thanks for savings us, she said, then a lotta them came by to express they gratitude, to too!
Lots o them, said thanks too.
One by one before the night was done, they all thanked him.
BR said, let’s all eat, drink and be merry every body, ha, ha, ha. . . For tomorrows another day!
[ 165 ]
BR, is a very conflicted personality, very, very conflicted. He is a person, possessed by many personalities, who in his twisted mind, thoroughly dislikes all people, because he considers them untrustworthy, and so ethically flawed that he places more significance, momentousness, and importance on the life of a little tiny bug than on them.
Such is the distain he holds for them, calling them all Bumble bugger bitches! But yet, the world he knew was blown up, and he survives, and he comes into conflict with this belief! Why? Because, now, somehow, he feels the need to place a special value, on these people, because it was he who saved them! And he finds it hard to accept the concept of the lost of all humanity that lost their lives on doomsday.
And he wants to believe that somehow these people are special, and these people he pulled out of the boat are different, and can be better than the people who perished, and even though he knows he is a crazy madman, he thinks he can help them to be better.
See, me, he said, me? Shucks, I like bugs! They hide in rugs, crawl in and out of the coffee mugs, and sometimes, while you sleeping they up and give you a hug! Yes, sir, . . Bugs Bugs, Bugs! They know what to do. They don’t gotta be fed. They feed themselves. When a neighbor acts up, you eat him.
Life is simple! No bullshit! No six o’clock news! No lying politicians!
Now, I got all these people buggers around me, but, I still like, what I like, I like doing what I like, sitting down at sundown, alone, and cooking bugs in my frying pan. I hope I don’t regret bringing these fish out. They don’t know me. I can be, they, best friend, o they worse enemy! We’ll see. We’ll see. We’ll see. I sure hope none o them mess with me, but i
f they do, I’ll kill ’em!
Now that they’re here, if they saw me frying up bugs in a pot, they’d criticize me, and laugh, and I probably, put a bullet in they nose! And chop off they toes, all depends on how I feel that day!
O’ course, I knows, I gonna, have to change, one day, because of what I did today. Saving all them, I gotta be their leader now! Being a governor, a king, and ruler of men, is not my cup of tea. I just don’t got no patience for this crap, in me! Makes me wish there was a dam god for real, that boy, better help me, cause this shit ain’t gone be easy!
But, in honor of the memory of my mommy and daddy. I promise to do better. and make these buggers, these fish, these people better! Even if I gotta kill’em
Or a least if my brain gets better! Start this here world again, if I can!
People, all o them something wrong, with ’em! The high class, act low class! It’s how they think, that’s why we got nuero intra interfaces on our heads most of the time, or at least we had, before the world blew up. So, now we’re unconnected. No more Google, bingo, bango, or none o that crap! We gotta use our brain!
So, if they listen to me, I would not kill them. As a bug would do. I’d give’em a trial and then kill’em!
Year. Trials, are an old, old, old idea, been around for couple of years. Wait, come to think of it, maybe couple hundred years! I don’t know? Thinking bout it, I remember my teacher saying trials been around a bit. So, I guess, joe, I know these, some of these men, bugs gone act up, cause a revolt! There’s are so many of them.
[ 166 ]
If they challenge my control, Boy! They heads gone roll!
And I gone have to straighten them out! It’s gone be rough! I gone be, physiologically and mentally taxed. And I am taxed, waxed and nuts to the guts, and crazy, all ready, freddy! So I guess I just kill ’em. Although I don’t know If I got enough bullets though? We’ll see!
Anyhow, I know there’s a lot them, but, besides my shotgun, I found something. Heh, heh ! To take’ em, down if they full around!
During the destruction of the world, to escape, all us fools were running! I ran my ass off. The ground opened up. I fell down into hole in ground, a cave!
In the cave, was a tunnel to old, old ass bunker, the government had abandoned. I got locked and buried alive, in that cave, that had stored boxes, marked classified. I don’t know what, or who put them there. But, I found [ lethal drugs] inside! That is, mother [ bleeping], serious drugs, drugs that kill, and don’t play! And this cowboy, knows, . . I know that shits kills, and how to use it.
Anyhow, forget’ bout that, let’s see how it
goes, let’s enjoy dinner. Yep, I am lucky! Tonight I gone have food. Real food, no more bugs! At least until I get a hankering for the taste of fried bugs, again!
Funny thing about bugs, the world blew up! People died, but the bugs and me are still alive! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, oh, ha, ha, I am buggy! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!
Well, anyway. its dinner time!
And the food was smoking! I can’t wait to get some of them meat treats! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha oh ha, ha, ha, . .
No body stopped to ask what the meat was? I just told them I found some food, and water and stuff in the ship, and that was sufficient!
But I did, get quite a few request for hot dogs from some of the children!
I just said, we don’t got none! And some of the young ladies wanted veggie burgers and tofu, and I told them too, we just don’t got none! But, that said, they all had hearty appetites!
They ate it up hungrily, stuffing themselves, just like I thought, with that red barbecue sauce, it was finger licking good, if I do say so my proud self! They, was so dam hungry, WOW, I never saw so many jaws moving and eating! I looked up to the big upper Earth over my head, and said to myself secretly: see, sucker, do you see? Despite all the destruction, we ain’t gone die, fly, fly we be. After all, after all the shit you put us through, we gone live! And if I gotta feed them what ever, I got to feed them, we gone live! That’s a promise, . . . Thomas!
Now, getting back to the dinner!
The Captain was sitting, to my right. He was still calling out to me and thanking me, like a broken record machine.
I handed him, a beer and told him to shut the hell up. He replied, thank you, thank you, for saving me! Thank you, thank you! You know the same old, bla, bla bla ballad, etc. So what the hell else is new?
Anyhow, now that everyone was out, we got to talking and I asked him, when world blew up, does he know what happened to him personally?
Well, I got to say most of the time he didn’t understand a dam thing I was talk’in, bout! But anyway!
I think part of his brain is still frozen! He is koo coo! Boy reminds me of those old birds that live in them clocks! His head, is what I said, it works off and on! Sometimes he can talk, and be down right articulate, smart even, and the next moment, a moron! If you know what I mean!
The Captain was a Greek dude, according to his papers. He was obviously, in bad shape by the looks of him. I was handing some beer to the folks, and when I came over with a box of beer, he stretched out his hand shivering, and I handed him a can of beer to drink! Boy, took it, but he had the shakes real bad, and he drank it straight down without stopping.
Some of it he spilled on himself! I pitied him! But at least the crazy glue kept his head together. I’d hate for that shit to fall apart!
He still was freezing, from being locked up in the that dam freezer.
[ 167 ]
His face had the look of a man lost.
The look in his eyes was that of a wild man, and he would keep shutting them. He shut-’em down, for a minute or two, then he’d open them up, and look around quickly, and close them back! As if he didn’t see what he liked, he thought he could erase it, by closing his eyes again. To me the sucker mucker fish, was showing physiological, behavioral symptoms of negative ARF! You know, Augmented reality dis functionality, ain’t that a bitch! Oh, man!
I sure hope for his sake, it’s ain’t that?
Ain’t no head doctor can help that. And no therapy I know about.
He kept open and closing his eyes in one minute intervals, then he would act funny, and start grabbing his chest and shaking his head all around, and stomping his foot on the ground, like the boy, was trying to stomp, and kill roaches, or bugs, or something!.
As if things to him, were not what, they seemed. As if, he was in a dream, or scared of his own shadow, or something?
I know a lot of professional dudes, like this here captain, Di Andronikos, Dudes like him, had to have gotten BCI, community old standard stuff. Its real old technology, but y’all know, brain computer interfaces, is used on all kinds of transportation. So, as ships captain he had it, and Sensorimotor Neural Engineering mind launching, capacity too.
And tech, stuff, like that, y’all know, whether you be a driving a rocket plane, rocket train or rocket cruise ship, like this one, they all need to be hip, and equipped!
Also, they gotta, have NIR, nuero interface rods modules in they head, and tons of all kinds of junk, like the old time, EEG, tests to make sure that they got a state certified brain, that is approved to handle the responsibility and duties of transporting thousands of people.
After all, thinking about it, that old rocket cruise ship, ain’t a easy sucker, to drive.
[ 168 ]
But, now with all the networks dead, that means no online brain–signal processing to influence him, and help him make good decisions, no mo! The dude is out of awareness, of inter sectionality of the global world, cause the earth is messed up, split in two! They ain’t no mo, global world. Shucks!
Don’t exist no more! This captain here, he’s finished! No alternate high capacity JPR, brain back ups, for him. Now, with GI, niche, internet destroyed, and down forever, too!
Hell, now, the sucker’s, brain, was just an ordinary plain stupid brain! Plus, I found the boy, on the floor in the freezer, and the boy’s circuits just gotta be frozen still, and malfunctioning, too! Hell!
And lord knows, we don’t gotta no understanding, what’s going on in him, and his po head! Who knows how that, broken circuitry gonna effect the boy.
That stuff in his head ain’t no toy!
[ 10 ]
The boy, was paranoiac, and constantly looking around this way and that as if he was expecting something or somebody, and besides that, he kept touching and feeling his body, especially his chest, and he would grab at his bloody shirt which he had completely opened! The opened shirt, was ripped in several places and was awashed in blood stains!
I thought I saved him, from below, and I did, but the boy had demons in his head. I, or nobody could not save this man from that. They were in his head, and I could see him spiraling inside himself, going down toward dementia, or a very bad, bad place! If he goes nuts, totally, I am just gone have to shoot him , or tie him up to a pole or something, cause this is more than I bargained for! Way more! Ain’t, no shrinks alive, the likes of them are all dead, no hospitals, no nothing.
I hope he makes it, I thought to my self!
Judy, told him to have some milk, but he declined laughing, ha,ha,ha, that was the first time I heard him laugh, and Judy laughed too! I looked at the woman, now clean and washed , her blond hair blowing gently in the winds, with new life in her! She had changed, this was the woman that was not so long ago wishing to die, holding nose in the dark! Now, alive and looking around up at the earth above her head curious like a child!
She was attractive too!
She down a whiskey straight out the bottle no glass.
And she nodded to me and I raised my bottle to her, she looked good in the fire light, as the it got dark fast, because the Earth above us, was blocking out most of the setting sunlight. It cast a kind of eerie blue mist to the everything, just then a breeze blew, and a distant very faint but distinct crying cat was heard! Meowwww, meowwwwduck! What the hell was that asked Judy, I don’t know said, Saddie, seated, legs folded next to her on the ground near the campfire! She a plump busted brunette bombshell, with a rebellious snake personality, combined with a don’t give a dam attitude! Just a cat it getting on, what ever, she remarked, like it was nothing. But, BR, had heard that calling wind before, yes, he did, and at first he thought he was imagining it, but was now relieved that others could hear it too, anyway
Just then the Captain got his head together a little bit. He got to feet, and started rambling saying crazy stuff, and I said you got to slow down, speak up, speak loud and a little slower, so we can understand you boy!
I am, a little confused, so much, has, all this has happened today, he said, I like you, all of us have gone through a tremendous shock,
[ 169 ]
I realize that we are the lost,
but, we are lucky to have Big Rex, Otherwise we would all be dead!
I want to tell you what, What, I want to go say, he said, incoherently, as he walked unsteadily around the campfire, we were all looking at him! Then I said why don’t tell us, continue on, he looked at me, and said are you sure?
I didn’t understand it, But, what was happening was no dream, he said, that much I knew! I know what he was going through, if he was loosing his mind! I’d been through some hard mental stuff too, and his mind would have to adjust fast or go nuts, and dam man, shit, going nuts is something, something I know about! This boy, is going to have to snap out of it, or else, simple as all that!
I said, we all been through hell, if you boys want to discuss it, what happened to you I am all ears. Some of the men walked over drinking and gather around closer to listen to the Captain. The kids, were making fun of him cause he was acting strange!
Well, I talked with both men, Jonathan and the Captain, and we had just started a conversation, and it was getting more and more interesting, not just to me but the others seated around the fire!
The Captain, who said he was greek dude, from Athens, in the Aticas region. He said his name was Di Andronikos, and I recalled it, when I looked a this Identification, he had on him. It sure enough did read, that was indeed was his name!
And he told us, he was working with the shipping line called [ MV MARINA ] the cruise ship we were on before. He was working filling short termed contracts with the shipping line, which he had been working with them for more than thirteen years, and every thing was ok, for years, no problems. But, he said, he couldn’t discuss, what happened, he said it was too scary, a place of no return for him. He’s my brother, I know its heavy for the man, but shit, all that did was get my curiosity up!
What was it? Bring it back what, I asked him? And he said, he saw terrible things, to, terrible to talk about! Whats up with that, asked Saddie curiously?
Nothing, it’s not good to know, that this thing was in my nuero platform! It is surreal, its hatred of me and thirst to do harm was unquenchable…
I don’t think you would, like to hear about it! Me? what, she asked dumbfounded, as she sat looking up at this guy walking around in circles around and around the campfire like hypnotized fly?
[ 170 ]
Well, sir, Ok! Boy, was acting mighty strange, he had every curious. He stood there looking into the fire light.
Then, he walked in a circle, so more then sat down, and lifted his hand and grabbed his chest, pushing it in. Then, he got back up walked in a circle again, then sat down again, looking like a fool, that didn’t know he was looking like a fool, and thats the worse kind of fool!
Then, then he fell back breathing hard, almost falling!
We all were clueless!
We all looked at each other, like saying what is with this boy! This boy is sick!
Jonathan looked at me, and I looked at him, then we both looked at the Di Adronikos, he was definitely looking at his chest and talking to himself, mumbling! His eyes were looking all wild like, and flittering around in his head.
Oh shit, . . Saddie said, time bomb time going off, oh well! What ever!
Hey boss, said Saddie, whats up with the Captain? The Captain is smart, I said, knowing and sensing he was going through a rough patch in his head!
And, he began freaking out, breathing real hard. Jonathan smiled broadly and said, look, Di Andronikos, My friend, relax, forget about it, as he said that, and handed him another the cold beer, which the Captain put to his head, and again he drank the whole can of beer, without stopping!
So, catching on, Saddie smiled, also and handed him a drink too, twisting off the cap for him, it was a small bottle of Bacardi Rum.
[ 171 ]
She smiled pushing her long hair from out of her eyes, and said here, big guy this one is for you! It will make you feel better, Captain!
Again he down it nonstop, and then fell out! Jonathan and I looked at each other laughing, and smiling a little, then a lot! Wondering what’s with this boy? The children giggled too, ha, ha, ah!
He collapsed fell backward looking straight up at the sky, and he was talking but, no words were coming out!
We thought it was so funny, we chuckled!
Then, he all of a sudden grabbed his chest, Ow! Ow, he yelled!
The crowd stopped eating their dinner, and grew silent watching him intently! Their eyes, was bugging out!
Then all of sudden, the man got up and started jumping up and down, all around, like one of those Australian kangaroos, barking like a dog,” ruff, ruff! Roufff, ” And howling and acting all crazy, and he jumped in the campfire, and I kicked him out before his clothes caught on fire! And Jonathan pushed him to the ground. And the boy, began crying nd carrying on, and going into convolutions!
Then he turn over on his stomach and he started vomiting, coughing up green stuff on the ground. No, no, now it can’t. It cain’t, no, he screamed! I need help, helpppp! Help me! Help, Helpppp!
It is so bad, it so, so terrible! What? What, asked Judy, walking over to help him!
It’s happening! What? It, help me, he said pleading to us, and he acted like as if he was gasping for air. He shook and his eyes rolled in his head! He seemed to have difficulty breathing, and was coughing, and was panting, as he spoke in fragmented efforts, to speak to us!
What tell, um, er, you, tell me, tell us what, whats, what happened sir, asked Judy?
It about to happen to me again, he yelled as he rolled his eyes again! No! Cough! I, er um, I can feel, I can feel it!
Look! Di Adronikos! You’re with us now! Your safe, said Judy, sympathetically as she patted him on the shoulder, trying to get him to calm down, but it was not working!
If anything this boy, was on his way to looney-toons ville! Getting crazy and crazier!
Nothing is going to happen to you! Do you understand! Now, now, now come on, calm down Mr, andronikos, relax and tell us what’s wrong?
What happen to you, tell us Jonathan continued urging him seriously, as he knelt down, looking down at him. The guy began tremoring, and his shoulder and back muscles twitched involuntarily!
The captain, the captain was going crazy, right in front of every body sitting around the campfire! We all were all shocked, and wondered what on Earth was happening to this guy. Nice guy, but oh my God, he was going nuts! One moment he open and close his eyes, and jump up, stomp his feet down hard, like he try to kill a roach or bug. He was out of it now, and it was getting worse.
He was going into violent convulsions, jumping and falling all of the place. He’d roll over, and over of the floor, acting all crazy, and yelling screaming incoherently. The look in his eyes, told you was seeing and fearing something real terrible. We didn’t have clue, and didn’t know it was? Suddenly he shut his eyes like a little kid playing games!
When he open them, his eyes seemed to be popping out his head, he tossed his body around banging his head on the floor, it was a fright full scene.
Then he closed his eyes tightly again, and open his mouth, and let a loud scream. Yow Yowwwwww. He was just screaming bloody murder. We knew he was having violent thoughts, and had to restrained him anyway we could.
Other wise who knows what could of happened to him, he wasn’t in control of himself. His arms and legs were flailing about trying to hit us and push us away, while we together, tried to hold him down.
He could easily, turn violently around, twist around, and roll over straight into campfire and get himself burned up badly or killed!
So I, told Jonathan, and another man, named Willy to give a hand with him, and help tie him to pole at the back of generator machine a few feet away!
Well, it took a bit of doing, goes without saying, he was fighting us all the time, acting nuts, and all! Don’t where he was getting the strength from, but we managed to grab him, put him down, and dragged and tied him up with rope and tied him to a pole. He, was going off something awful.
The captain was shaking and fighting to get free.
And did stop yelling and screaming! And the guy, was really struggling hard to get up, even though he was all tied up!
He pleaded with us to let him free, and yelled ;
No, you can’t let it get me, No! No! Stop! Let me go. It is here. Here do you hear, he yelled! He told us something was out to get him, and was screaming his had off. I held his neck back and the man pulled away, growling, and trying bite me. BR, held his chest down, and yelled at him, gag habit, tell us what the hell is happening to you, captain? Can you calm down? Can you? Calm, down down boy, he said, looking down at his watch’s screen, on his arm, and tapped the record mode screen. And said, go, ahead. Talk! You afraid, somebody is in your head?
Yes, yes, yes, I may be engaging in Greek privilege, cause I acknowledge a Greek captain I be, it is my right to be aware of my history,
But the Pantheon, God Zeus, power’s supreme, was nothing compared to the power of love’s misery, very often defective leaders of people be, a warning to you BR, listen to me!
Cronus ate his children, fearful that one day they would become more powerful than he, Ghostnet, Hainan, Conficker, like the NSA, Eternalblue, yesteryear, wares, old malware true, old history but still, has its children to,
ate its offspring, fearful too, that they would become more powerful.
And me? And me ? Student of the Greek Elder Paisios, histories, and the prophecies of the end times.
Way back, when I was a child, in school I had to download a history book about the internet to read. And I read in a book about,” Hobby Lobby,” and The flip side of privacy is secrecy, and now today as an old man, I remember back, and I am confused. And thinking, . . If corporations, who are people too, want to track my data, can their agents and apps, be in my head? Watching? Watching me even though they are today now dead?
Or I’m not sure. I am really confused about this! But what I think it is most likely, My alternate darkside ego, disguised as me, you see, hacked into my head artificially,
Why? Fearful that my good-side. My moral good side of me, would become more powerful. And Now like Zeus, my chagrin is, perish I will be. Fend off it! Fend off it. Fend off it , . . . I cannot?
Cronus, spare this greek. God. Θεός, Θεός Please!
[ 172 ]
God help me, Ya, yaaaa OH no, Nooo. Help me, help me, is there no one, anti-malware from out there, from some where, that can help me out of this misery? Big Rex, looked down, looked up, and turned away, avoiding the old mans eyes, and said to him, . . . You are deeper than the ocean, dam sure deeper than the sea. I ain’t gone forget what you told me, he said. Still BR, to himself, thought he was gonna die soon, and this was him talking crazy. He let go of him, and said see. You can talk a lot and say a lot of things when you’re calmed down. Tell us, we all here listening to you, and we want to hear what you, what you got to say.
Ok , wait ok, let me, let, let me think, he said trying to catch his breath and relax, a little. He leaned back, and let his head rest back and he began to relate this astonishing weird story!
He said it all, a started about noon, midday at twelve O’clock. It was a nice day, clouds, in the sky, all things working on the ship, everything, just as it should be! No problems! The ship was functioning normally, working, everybody was happy, and having a good time. No kind of problems, he said. He was in a good mood. His sailors, were all going good too, the ship engine worked as they should flawlessly.
Well, it all started just about noon time. I was the one commanding the ship all morning, and I took my lunch break, went down stairs to my cabin below, to eat and relax, Captain Di Andronikos, said, He took the newspapers to read sports the section as is his custom. When, just like that, the lights in his the room, bam! They went out?
The light went out? What’s this? What the . . The hell’s going on, he asked himself annoyed at the unexpected inconvenience!
Well, sir, he had just come down, and was resting and taking it easy in bed, and it was not more than two minutes had gone by, and he didn’t expect absolutely anything to go wrong and all! But, things did go wrong?
First, the lights went out, impossible, he thought to himself. Then bingo! Then it came back on!
And, this he thought was a very strange. And, he was just about to get on up, and call on his radio up stairs, to ask his second in command, to find out why the lights went out? When suddenly, he felt this here, chest pain. His chest was all of a sudden tightening up. He thought it was nothing unusual at first. You know, he thought his ticker, was acting up, he did not think, perhaps he was having a heart attack or anything like that!
But it felt weird and crazy. He felt a sharp, sharp pain in the center of his chest, like his chest bone was hurting and about to crack open or something!
The pain, it got dam right, sharper, stronger type of pain, paining him, in his chest, right here, he said, pointing to his chest, and tapping it with his finger!
Just tapping it with his finger, three or four times, just to make sure, and let us know exactly where the spot is.
And the pain proceeded to get worse. And really disturb him, and this man’s composure was unraveling fast, as he spoke to us! He started coughing, and coughing, and then, he’d yelled out, Ow, ow, ow,
In a low, pitiful sounding sound!
Then, here and there, he would, stopped and took a deep breath before us, look at us, then his chest. Look at Judy, then me, then gaze up and look at the big upper Earth, floating over our heads in the sky.
Then, he started looking at the all the faces of the friendly, brite eyed children, looking intently, and curiously, at him as they sat, seated on the ground, around the yellow flashing light, of the campfire.
Then he would continue telling us his story! He was fidgeting all around, moving oddly this way, and that, glancing over his shoulder like he was afraid of a big bad boogyman or something.
Oh, my gosh! He’d continue talking.
His memory of what happened that day, made your skin crawl!
[ 173 ]
BR, bit into his hamburger, watching that captain talk! Took a drink, and winked and checked him out good! Oooo, we! He said, now that captain, is a nervous, fish. A nervous fish dude, this dude do be, yes, sir reee, commented BR!
The captain he shook his head and waved his hands round, and said he was in his cabin laying down, and he made weird movements with his hands and rubbed his belly, like it was jelly, and like he was trying to draw an outline of a shape to show us, or something!
So we could understand him. The, man said his chest swelled up like a ball. Like a late pregnancy woman, that looks like any minute, was about to have a baby!
I, got’s to tell you, I thought the boy, was plume nuts, said BR.
He said his chest started to expand and seemed to bulge out, and bulge out, bigger and bigger out of his rib cage as if he was, I don’t know?
As if it was going to split open, and his guts were gone to come out, with the power and force of a tornado, or something.
And fly up and crash straight into the ceiling!
I know it sounds crazy, but that what he did said.
He said, the pain, it felt like it strong, hurting him, real bad, like it was being caused by something, something big, and alive and wild moving inside of him!
He said, the pain got so dam bad, he wished he was dead, that’s how bad, he said it got!
As his face turned red!
So, now, with his chest heaving upwards, and downwards, and bulging, getting bigger, he said he did not know what to do?
The look of panic, was on the man’s face, beads of sweat appeared on his forehead, and he had look of fright on him, as his two eyeballs swelled out in his head!
Judy, said OMG!
Then, the captain said, the sensation in my chest, was so painful I began to scream and believe you me. That, was bad, it was scary, cause I never screamed! OH my God! It was too awful! Just awful!
Then, suddenly it stopped for a second. The pain, It went away, I took my shirt and opened it up so I could look down at my chest, and I was feeling my chest, when the pain struck back again, more powerful this time, like I got hit by a truck, or something. Pounding inside of me, what ever it was, wanting to get out! I closed my eyes tight as all hell, and yelled and screamed. Oh my God, Did I let out a scream! Hell, my chest swelled up, like, like what else can tell you like a ball. Like a woman about to give birth.
Oh my god, my god, Was, I about to give birth? Give birth to what? OMG! No. No, no, it can’t be.
And the miserable pain. It was unbelievable! That pain, OMG! It was too much, oh, to, too strong! And I looked down quickly at my chest! I looked at it. I am not a physician, so I don’t know what was occurring to me?
I tried to look and examined it, and I saw what looked like eyeballs looking out at me through my skin, my very own chest shin! I yelled NO, no, no, Noooooooooooo.
I screamed help, something is in me! Ya yarrrrrrrrrrrr-help-me! And it was blowing up, then, deflating, blowing up, and deflating rapidly! When it came back up, and it was getting bigger.
The skin on my chest, trembled and began to stretch out a lot! I could see the shape of something. I looked hard at it . It was a nose? OH My GOD! A nose, a dam nose on my chest. It had nostrils and it started to breathe, in and out!
OMG, great father in the heavens, praise be to thee, Lord I said, this cannot be happening to me! Please, . . Help me!
This thing I see!
A nose coming out of me, I yelled OH, NO, No no, no, noooooo!
But there with my own two eyes I saw it!
The outlines of a face under the skin! I was going crazy! It was impossible! But it was real! Help! Help ya,yaaaaa, . No, no! My body convulsed, and a strange force got me and picked me up!
I lifted up off of my bed. I don’t know maybe a foot or so. I was too confused, and anxious to think straight at the time. And this was all happening so fast!
Then I don’t know, just then,
I fell back down, but then it took me up in the air, and I rose up, up again, then it plunked me down in to my bed. Up down, up down, and all this time, I still was feeling this, this horrendous pain, that was really killing me! Killing me, OMG!
It, it was terrible! Help! He yelled! And, then, right there front of him was a 3D Fractal impersonator, that somehow, came out of the origins of a augmented reality back pack, that he was still wearing.
The captain, told us, he usually wears it, to get ships data overlays verified, and to fact checked imagery,
to help him chart inter-coordinated boat, and sea maps, for ocean routes, and also, for essential logistic, and passenger tracking reconnaissance record keeping.
But, he was still wearing the battery power IT device, on his back strap, and now, somehow, it was malfunctioning terribly, and a superimposed computer-generated, malignant, software avatar, tapped to his DNA, records!
[ 174 ]
Then, self produced, a 3D fractal creature, in the form of Doubleganger, that looks exactly like him in real life! And was coming into this reality, for unknown purposes! And it was, very very frightening! There was no deliberations about this. It just happened. The thing was in control, and I was not! It was real. It was an outrage!
The problem, was a glitch, had to channeled and hacked into, and stolen a self awareness piece, of classified, corrupted code, allowing it, access to programming himself, to hate me and kill me, specifically. It’s motives? Who knows?
And, this other self, was a Doubleganger and looked exactly like him! But unlike him, had no morality! No soul! But, . . Ironically, it was a soul all right, but, a soul out of control!
And he saw it’s body, in the room, even though the lighting was poor, and it made it look even weirder!
Then, my hand, he saw his hand stretch out of the wrist socket, and popped off my wrist, and it flew away like a mad hand with all five of its out stretched fingers, wiggling around menacingly, as it flew.
Then it stopped, as if it could look around, and it and twisted and quickly turned around flew back towards me, and tried to rip the nose off of my chest.
And when I saw that, I really, really felt endangered! It grabbed my nose, and it pulled and pulled, at it. It hurt so bad!
And I couldn’t reach it with my other hand to stop it, because my chest was so big now! The 3d virtual reality version of me, came into play now, downloading medical data. It pretended to be a medical surgeon, a Doctor, now. And medically intervened, using retrieved data on incidences of anatomical anomalies, and transposed an anatomical shifting of my mouth, from the front of face, to up on top of my head! So that my teeth were now growing out of my skull. It gave a finger a finger to look at, and put it close to my mouth. And I know, I should not do such things! I am a religious man! It’s wrong! But, I, I was so angry, and my hatred of this thing, had grown so. Well, do you blame me? Given the opportunity, I just open my mouth on my head, and bit into it, and ripped it off, and ate it! You got to understand, I was hungry! It looked at me! Then it laughed, at me! Ha, ha, ha! And stuck its finger in my eye!
I screamed stop, stop, stopppppp! Oh my God, did that hurt! I told it to stop! But it wouldn’t listen.
All of sudden, now I, felt my arms, feel funny like. And were inflating up, and getting big, swelling up like balloons, and in an instant, they popped off, out of my arm sockets, one by one, and I saw them, when they popped of my body! And Oh my God, if you could have seen it! Oh No! The blood gushed out, like a fire hydrant.
[ 175 ]
I was losing massive amounts of blood, and it rose of all over like a wild fire hose out of control! I was clueless, didn’t know what to do? I didn’t understand what was happening to me?
I screamed help, help, my arms, please, . . . get my arms. What am I going to do without my hands, I started panicking?
How will I eat? OMG! I needed hands. I need hands to eat? I got to have them! It was terrible. What was happening to me? What was happening? Then, Boom, my stomach popped open. My stomach guts flew out hitting the front wall. It fell down a leaving a trail of blood and pieces of bluish, white and red nuggets, of what looked like, hairy, stringy moving stomach guts parts, and this bio mass, is what splashed up against the flat room wall.
It stuck momentarily, than proceeded to fall down on the floor! Then of all things, my nose, started acting up! It started to bleed! I had a nose bleed on my chest, of all places! And the blood drops, were dark red, and the liquid blood ran down randomly, and
meandered down my big tall round chest and, and formed tiny rivers, that rolled down my chest, on to my hips, and my pants became wet with blood, which then dripped in my bed, and rolled across the bed sheets fast, with supernatural power, dripped onto the rug on the floor of the cabin, and briskly rolled across the floor, as if it was on mission, and hit the far wall. Where, it immediately climbed up vertically, and stopped and began writing the letters to a story.
I read what it said, something I can’t repeat!
I then heard laughter, ha, ja, ha, ja, ja, ha, ha, mean cruel twisted sounding laughter from another world in 3D Augmented reality space!
And then my stomach burst open a second time, and my nose flew off and out zooming straight up and crashed into the ceiling,
And I saw it. I had giving birth to him, and him, my child was, was a doubleganger identical copy of me. OMG! At first it looked like he was going to mimic me? It was like looking in a mirror! But I was, and he was me, inside 3D Augmented reality!
And he pulled off his right arm, right out of its socket. I saw all the veins in his arm hanging out from it.
And he took it, and started beating me with it in my face, Bam, Bam, bam.
I was shocked. I couldn’t believe it! He kept slapping me with it! My past experiences with 3D augmented reality creatures, before was that they had been characteristically mild, low-key, and no danger to people, but now what was happening to me, my opinion changed forever.
The pain was off the charts. I am going die for sure!
The hand that came off my arm was back, and was now was forcefully tearing my skin off my face! I screamed as it peeled off my right cheek. I screamed out loud and wished I was dead. Then it grabbed my eyelid and pulled on it. OW! Ow! I was able to see my hand close up, and when you see the skin real close, I could look at it good. I don’t know how, but my implanted nuero internal magnifier, enabled me to see the pores in the skin looking like pot marked sewer holes, and inside these hundreds and hundreds of pores in the skin, which under normal circumstances were small and tiny, were now, huge, and were big, wide, and round and shaking this way and that, all around. In each of them, in it’s center, I saw little eyes looking out at me!
They were connected and floated in a liquid, that was moving in there, that was thick, wet like yellow amber snot syrup! Through it, I saw it had, all these tiny red, and blue veins, that spewed out, and got spit into my eyes! It’s this action, is what led its flesh to become welded to my eyeballs, and got attached. I screamed, knowing this was appallingly gruesome, and silently invoked it to stop, but it did not. The man, raised his arm, and boldly smashed it through a glass window, in 3D augmented space, that rose up out of the brite blue wall. And its arm passed through the wall as if it was butter, and grabbed a giant pink piglike thing, and brought it back, and pushed it in my face, and rubbed it all in. And he laughed then looked at me, and pulled me by the hair and kicked me right in my face! Ow! OMG! I wished I was dead! Anything to end this!
I almost blacked out! I was seeing stars! I was hurting bad! It went on and on, and I could tell It was, really enjoying cutting me open.
It wanted me dead, and by the look of things, I couldn’t take much more of this, I would be! I gave up. I felt I wanted to be dead too. It had to be better than this.
I screamed and screamed, it was so horrible. Screaming was all I could do!
[ 176 ]
And, he wouldn’t stop! He kept coming! He kept trying to kill me! He kicked me, and he pushed me over, and stabbed me, over, an over all over my body, again and again! All I could do was bleed red and wish I was dead!! I felt so ashamed. The feeling of helplessness hurt me, my pride, made me feel horrible.
All I knew was I was dying. I preferred that to this! I was in such pain I could not think, and I was bleeding so much, really fast!
I tried to get up, but he pushed me down! He, smiled sinisterly, and made an obscene gesture, then, he blinked at me? I didn’t know what was the reason? Then, he reached over and plunged his hand into my open chest, he ripped out one of my ribs, and stabbed me in the eye! Ow, Oww! I screamed!
It was a massive blow. NO! Noooooo
I can’t see. I can’t see. Oh my God! I can’t see! I can’t Oh no, no, no! I screamed in extreme pain. Stop for the love of God, please! But he didn’t listen to me, but instead just laughed! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. . .
He seemed to getting his kicks off in my head, and laughed And I told him to go to hell! He burst out laughing again, Oh ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, Oh ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
[ 177 ]
And, then he was quiet! There was a pause, and uneasy moment of silence. Oh NO, nooooooo, ya, yaaaaaaaaa. And, suddenly, I looked up, and to my amazement, the ceiling was raining! Raining down tiny red balls of blood drops, and it was raining real hard! And this scuttled, any of my hopes of getting out alive. The room started to fill up and soon would be flooded, drowning me.
I saw him, he was waiting, waiting for me smiling, and I knew he was happy!
Meanwhile, the bloody rain fell down in torrents, in my eyes blinding me. I reacted defiantly, but I couldn’t do anything, and now, blind, I totally couldn’t see, and I passed out. The bloody water levels rose up, higher and higher, the bed I was on, submerged. I can’t swim. I had been battling this, and lost, said the captain sadly, and closed his eyes. And was silent.
Stay tuned Chapter 8
[ 178 ]
CHAPTER 8
The Tweets of Madcow Sammy
BAD PERSONALITIES
BIG REX
Chapter 8
[ 179 ]
It was so strong, like something was exploding inside of me, the thing in me. Oh my God! My mind began to go numb with the pain.
It was driving me insane! It was killing me. It was so bad. Oh My God! I looked down at my chest, and something was pushing through my chest like a knife. Something, oh no, no something was inside, inside of me Ow Owwww.
Suddenly, a thunderous, crunching sound, was heard coming from inside me! I screamed Help! Help Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, hep, HELP,heeeeelpppkkkhekp! Ocka ock! ock!
As a big blood soak head, popped out!
Burst through the center of my chest, ripping it up, with the force of a hundred wild thundering horses, out me! It snapped my chest open, PLACK CRACK!
MY chest bone swung open like flood gates, like two swinging doors letting, letting something from hell out! Suddenly, the thing came rushing up, spraying spit, up out of him, filling the air were thousands of droplets of red bubbles of blood, that flew out, smashing against the walls with a thud. Then, there was like an explosion going off in him, and you could see his rib bones, came blasting out, rotating a round faster than the eye can see. Then, flew his guts into the air, like raw bones snarls, and little arteries, wiggling, like thousands and thousands of red colored worms, scattering up against the ceiling dragging, and drawing fractal lines around on the ceiling. And they stuck there hanging like if glued to it! His liver flew around, and around on the ceiling, as if it was alive and living, and thinking on its own, and was dripping and spraying out blood, and was quivering, running across the white painted ceiling above of his head. The ceiling was raining blood, down on me! And, when he saw it, was so shocked, he opened his mouth to scream, the liver turned from maroon to brite florescent red, and jumped clean off the ceiling, straight down into his opened mouth choking him! His eyes, stunned opened wide, popping out of his head! His body was going into violent convolutions as he coughed, gagged on himself!
[ 180 ]
Then out came the specter of the insane, when another, huge, huge blood red, round fractal monster creature thing, just popped, and barreled out of my chest, too! Was there no end? Seems I had virtual reality doorway portal in me, letting monsters flow forth, non stop! I screamed out No, no, and then it roared
:Ya,Yahhhhhhhaaaooooommduuuucck! It was slimy looking, and smelled real bad, like rotten flesh! It was red bloody, and shaking violently. It, was covered with big bulging veins, and blood pouring out of it. It was a head, a head with features! I let a loud cry for help! Yaaaaa, it was me ah ahhhhhhh he yelled for help! And it screamed as it came out of my chest and I could see it looked like me, and I screamed, and it screamed too! Yaaaaaaa ahhhhh! OH Yaaaaaa , ahhha it mock duckaaaaaa ahahaahahah ya! It was insanity time, all over again! I realized I was caught in deathly time loop! ! Help! It was terrible, it was my face on it. Another one, just burst out of my, my chest, too! The head, was red and covered in red blood all over it, followed by, by by by my, my, Oh No! This time, this time, it, it the thing had my neck, then it had a chest, my two arms appeared out of me, and forcibly held me down on the bed. It had the power of jack hammers, as it began hitting me!
I was pinned down, like I was nailed down, couldn’t even move! And I could see its muscles bulging out, it was moving and oscillating super fast, and the blood sprayed off of it, into my face and eyes! My eyes were burning and blinking, like I was cutting up onions or something! I was blinking, a mile a minute, as it, as it, as oh No!
Its body was covered in slimy thick glue that was stretching, stretching as it climbed out of me. The lights went out, but that did not stop it! Oh nooooo no! It was no light and pitch black, but I could feel him stepping out of my chest. The liquids made sounds, and I could feel it dripping off off him, on to me, and it was falling and dripping down my face, and mouth! I had to stop opening my mouth to scream cause, otherwise it would fill-up with-it! But it was, It just so, OMG! It was so hard to keep my mouth closed! I was in such pain, I had to, I just had to scream! Do you understand me? The captain said, ashamed and bursting into tears. He bent over facing the ground, as if trying to hide his face from us!
[ 181 ]
We all, all felt bad and sad for him, as he tried, once more, to continue talking! But was choking on the saliva forming in his mouth.
Some of it fell out and some he spit out!
But it was getting harder and harder for him to explain it, because the feeling and emotions of that memory were to huge, too sensitive and raw!
So, but then he yelled, it was, it was Ya yan, ya, yaaaaaa ahh ocp ock, help, it was so terrible! I gulped down a pot of mock ya,aahha ock I had to let go, I had to expel air, as I felt a sharp harsh abrupt pain in my respiratory organs, as they blew out on to the ceiling! This can, this can’t not be, no, no this , why is this happening? Yaaaa ah ah ahhh , he screamed and collapsed on the ground rolling headfirst, in the dirt near the campfire, as the people looked on totally shocked, their eyes bugging out in their head! Together our jaws dropped, as we watched this person withered around on the ground, in pure pain! He rolled around, and Judy ran over to him trying stop him from continuing! Its too much for you, she exclaimed frustratingly, and to horrible for us to hear, do you hear, do you hear me, do
you hear? No, he moaned coughing. I got to, I got to I got to finish, you got to know what’s coming? OMG, its gets worse?
It gets a hell’ova lot worse asked saddie, listening intently? Much worse, said the captain shaking feverishly!
The causation, of it all, was unclear, but not the horror! The relationship of every thing that happened to him was down right revolting. But he seemed to gather his wits about him, once more, take a deep breath, and, although he had tears running down his face, he continued!
Then, as this thing climbed out of me, I screamed and screamed till I fell out, and, and then I blackout, that’s all I remembered. Next thing I know, time had slipped, and I was in a dark place. And I woke up inside the freezer with a bunch of other sailors. I don’t understand or remember how I got down there, or why? I was inside and slipped, tripped and hit my head against the door, as the others ran to the back of the storage. Then, there was a big boom sound, BOOM! As the back section collapsed in on us! I heard a loud explosion, like the world was coming to and end, it was horrendous! I don’t know from where but it shook the whole boat, felt like it got picked up, violently? And we got tossed about, like in a car crash, turning over thousands of times! I blacked out, again. That was it, when I came to, a second time, I found my self alone in the darkness, that was it, he said. When, he came to, there was not a sound in the whole boat. Total silence. He, first, thought he was dead, and somehow he was in a black space, he said. And I thought I was an animal, and I felt around, and I could smell all kinds of things by their odors!
[ 182 ]
I did raise my self up, but it didn’t occur to me, that I was human, anymore, to the contrary, I, I thought I must have been reincarnated back to life as a dog or something, cause it felt very natural for me to walk around on all fours, on my hands and my knees! Strange right?
I felt something, I can’t explain it, er um I, it was reactions, in me, some kind of some, some kind of catalyst, causing a chemical reaction in me, cause my mind was going crazy, but I recalled studying back in school about different chemical reactions. And this, well, it was kind of like chemical reactions, that started with the reactants, having some sort of energy activation, that results in the bonding of the two material’s molecules, and forms a new product, and the most common form of energy is heat, either the chemical reaction will cause the blended mixture molecules to give off heat, or absorb it. And I was in a freezer, and I wasn’t feeling cold. I was not! Then so, I felt no cold at first, because some kind of reaction was happening inside of my mind? I don’t know? It’s hard to explain. It was something primal in me, very primal, something was raging chemically in me. Something was happening! I remember in high school learning about, how to understand the differences between what’s called , “Endothermic and exothermic reactions.” And the words are derived from their names. “Endo” which means “to draw into,” and “Exo” means “to give off.”
And, and er, um, um huh, the, well the endothermic reactions draw heat in from their surroundings, and I don’t know how, but I was drawing in heat from some place. I don’t know where? But I did not feel cold inside the freezer for a long time!
Now the other reaction, the Exothermic reactions gives heat off to their surroundings, well I wasn’t giving any body heat off. I felt very warm somehow. I felt like I was a dog, an Alaskan Husky a dominant dog bred for the cold! I thought I was a dog from another reality, or something, I don’t know! It’s difficult to even begin to explain this! I remember barking, barking! Yes, I know weird right? And, weird or not, it felt normal to me, I know, what, what you’re thinking, this is madness, but it’s the truth!
[ 183 ]
First, the captain said, please, I want you to accept that this statement is possibly true, and agree to believe it, just for a moment, because there is no other way else, to explain it!
You don’t have to agree, just give it room in your belief system for a short try out. OK? I believe, we are all beings that have the spirits of our past lives, in us somehow, and for me, I think I was a dog in another life, somewhere, in my past, because I swear to you. I started to be able to smell all kinds of things. I did smell the matches in that dead sailors pocket in the freezer with me. I didn’t know he had matches or even if he smoked cause there’s was no light! Everything was black, it was the pitch darkness. Yet I could smell he was there, and I went and centered on him, and I smelled he had matches! How do you explain something, something like that?
I walked around inside the freezer in the pitch blackness smelling around like a dog, at this and that. I smelled blood. It was the blood of the dead sailors, way in the back of the freezer, and I crawled over to them, and I smelled them, to see if anyone was alive, but my ears which too, seemed to be very acute to me. I did not hear or smell, no breathing or movement, only silence! No breathing, no movement, everything was dead still. Dead and silent, like I said I could smell things and I could smell the Oder of cigarettes, and the Oder of matches in one of the dead mens pockets! Something I could never could have smelled before, if you ask what does a match smell like? For the life of me I wouldn’t know? Did you know they have distinct acidly smell? Somehow I was able to smell it, thank god,too? Other wise I would never have gotten the matches or the candles! I knew it was there. And not only that, but I could smell wax! The wax of a box of candles someone of them had. A man had on him. Why I don’t know? I am clueless, but I could, I could and I took it out of the man’s pocket. Out of his shirt pocket to be exact, in the dark, in the blackness of the room, in the freezer! And I smelled the matches, and so looking at these facts : I had one, the pack of matches, and two, the candles! And I lit the match and lit the candles, and if it weren’t for that, I don’t know. I really don’t know? I think I would have blacked out for sure, from the cold and turned into a solid piece of frozen ice in no time! Cause all of this had to be happening in my, my mind, that’s the only way I can explain it!
I lit the little white candles and placed them around, so I could see, it was after that, that I had light, in the freezer, and that I found a flashlights on the floor, next to some frozen meats, that had fallen off the hooks. So, when I lit the lights that’s when I started, I started to, to, to feel like I was getting cold. Weird don’t you think? It was my mind trying to save me, that’s all I can say, he said. He lighted some candles and tried to open the door of the freezer, but, couldn’t. It, it was blocked. He went crazy, freezing and hopeless, he said, and passed out, and fell face forward into a puddle of ice water on the floor! What I remembered was pain in my head, like I got kicked in the head! I felt my head was splitting in half or something? Then, then, really things changed when he heard you guys, he said! Thank God, for you guys, cause well, I don’t know what I would have done, he said crying and breaking down inconsolably?
Well, was evident to me this boy, this man got all his wheels off the ground, and is headed, sure enough for insanity town! Still, all in all, got pretty good memory! He remembered me finding him, and tripping and kicking him in the head! Looks like we done have to hold onto him! Only thing is, all the insane asylums done got destroyed, so what we gone do with this boy, I thought to my self? Dam, lots of questions, no answers!
We can’t force the man to shape up, cause it’d hard to shape up ourselves, let alone him!
Well, sir, the boy, lowered his head, and stared at the ground crying, and barking like a dog, every once and a while! And me and Jonathan stared at him and at each other! Then, that’s when Jonathan up, and bomb shelled me with this secret revelation!
[ 184 ]
He, well, that’s when Jonathan confessed, he too, had a strange feeling around noon time that day, at the same time, too! And he had fallen to the ground, and felt something was coming out not of his chest, but out of his back, his spine of his back too, but the pain was so bad he passed out! Now, the question comes up, what would of happened if he too, did not pass out, but stayed conscious, and seen things, that maybe he was not to see? Strange, hows that thought, working out for you?
Lots to ponder partner, I thought to my self!
So, that put everything into a quandary? What was going on that day? Doomsday? This gunk, was gunking up my head, I said, and I was clueless as a pig, with twig stuck in its butt! I grabbed a beer, I downed a swig! I shaked and shook my head, and said, Oh my gosh, oh big golly , what, oh what has this here world come to? But no answers came to my head, and I stayed as I was, clueless as a dog without a nose! This is too much, I said, drinking some more happy juice!
So, we all just sat there and stayed silent for a good, good long while. Many of us try to cover things up, secret things that happened to us in our lives, or have found a way to bury it, deep enough to have forgotten, just how awful it was! But, we, we are in a situation, where there is no hiding. No escape from the nightmare, because we are living in it! Well, sir, we just decided to stay quiet and rest up, less our minds come off the wall too, and we
end up like the captain, loonier than looney toons! Who knows what we will face, in the, in the future, if there is one?
[ 185 ]
The present is a rock
The present is all you got,
The present is what it is a gift,
The present is powerless to avoid a shift,
The present is nevertheless yours, till it slips through your fingers gone.
The present is not responsible to you, no ownership of it belong to thee, or your children you see, its a rock that turns to stone, cold and alone, turns to sand falls from your hand, and returns back from whence it came, fractal crystals playing in the universe’s games! iIt’s happily, extraverted, enthusiastically ready to mock, the fact that you lost your present rock, in a land that time forgot. Fast came the past, out of which every body who survived, this mortal setback, must forge a future, the resolution to take on the challenges, that confront this small band of humans, hold their lives in balance, and depends the future kind of mankind.
So,it is, this forlorned little community, salvaged from the boat, settles in for the night, some sleep around the campfire, others some distance away, each person in his own way, has to reconcile with this new reality! This new environment, and are saddled with the pain of extreme lost, and utter bewilderment of seeing with their own eyes, the raw havoc and destructive beating, the earths took when they split apart.
It’s more than enough to break anyones heart.
When you follow your mind and the your beating heart,
you inevitably latch on to what you know,
when what you know. no longer exist.
There’s a twist and the thing in you makes you want to actively seek out memories, to make you feel comforted, absent that, you seek out various things : entertaining people to help you to forget, drugs, like alcohol to soothe the dent in your psychic, or environments, that raise up your sense of spirit, to help you to flourish, and find fulfillment, and inner peace, above all, less down you fall.
[ 186 ]
And so, the next morning comes to pass, the next morning the sunrises up,at last. And can be seen way over to the right, glistening brightly beyond the two Earths peripheries. Little Saddie, looks around wondering out loud quips a upbeat remark : this beats the boat, no joke, ha ha, ha! I like it up here, she smiles talking to judy, who is just waking up beside her too. They slept on a blanket and are sill dreary eyed. Saddie yawns, and stretches looking around to see, quickly, if the men of which there are quite few are up, are staring and watching her. But they are not around, but, as per BR’s, orders are sleeping separately some distance away.
Compared to down there in that boat, we got it cool fool, what do you think, she asks Judy?
Well, Judy struggling to raise herself up, and looking tired, her hair sticking out, this way and that like a bush creature out of the wild, no make up, and plain! She cried a lot last night, she looked out of it, but managed to answer :
I think, we found ourselves between a rock and a hard place, and the profile we got is better, but,
Saddie interrupts her, but nothing, lets look of the sunny side, after all, if BR, didn’t show, when he did, the two for one holding the nose, job, we were doing on each others noses, would mean, we would be dead now, not like talking, like we are. Right?
I am dam glad were not, who knew?
I guess you’re right? Saddie interrupts again, guess? Girl! Give me a break? We’re still kicking, shit! Come on let’s get up and take a walk and look around kiddo! Wait, says Judy, let’s fix ourselves up, first! Me, hear you girl, my face looks like shit too, said Saddie nodding her head, smiling. Meanwhile, Judy, while reaching into one of thirty fancy hand bags, and purses, she copt out of the boat from dead ladies who aren’t going to need them anymore. She took a deep breath and flipped open her mirror, and looked at herself and stared. Pondering what Saddie had just said, and the truth of it all. They say the truth hurts, well this truth really does, she thinks to her self, questioning herself, did I really almost commit suicide? Amazing, how things turned out, she thought. Does it mean I am really a weak girl? A sissy girl? I think about what I did and that’s all wrong, or was it right? It’s my fault, it’s my fears and flaws, I guess? I do think I know when enough is enough, and trying to die at that time was right, the fact this, this crazy guy showed up to save me, doesn’t change anything or does it?
[ 187 ]
I guess it does, I owe him?
He’s kind of sexy in a really strange bizarre kind of way. A bad guy, and my momma always said stay away from the bad guys! But, she never did, she didn’t follow her own advice. I hope I will. She examines her face, the scratches on her right cheek, look like shit, she thinks about all the black and blue marks, she got down there in the dark! Are now, red and a little inflamed. So, she gets into the grove, turns on a music pod, and gets busy. She powder puffs them over, throws on a liner, puckers her lips and paints them too! One thing mommy always told me, baby when it comes to men, be ready, always! She hits a blast of spray perfume, under arms, legs, butt, neck, next, comes her hair, she combs it broadly, briskly, back from her eyes, and primps it with her hands, and turns and looks at Saddie, who’s doing her face up too!
So, what you thinking? I lost, snapped Saddie, I lost what I had. Every dam thing! I got nothing and lost everything, and so did everybody else here. So we all are about to start from the same line in the sand, what we do now, from this day forward, from this very day, will determine our future Judy. I say let’s go for it big time, she said, enthusiastically,
smiling, and shrugging off any pretenses! And after all we been through. I agree with her philosophy. And told her, get this Saddie, we got our fat fannies filling the seats, and our tits are sticking out, and our backs are against the wall, does that mean we got to fall, hell, hell, “NO!” I am with you girl, on that! Judy says to her, Saddie, Wow, what do you know? If you were to ask me, what role does personality play in a guys life?
I’d say, it’s everything. Saddie finishes painting her lips deep red, licks them and replies, hey, I am with you on that, shit, me, I got regrets. But I got blessing’s too. Year, but you’re a fighter, I can tell. What, Me? Year, year you! Why you saying that, cos you stoned? Wassup’ with that? Na, I can feel the strength in you, bitch!
[ 189 ]
Ha, that’s a compliment, I only wish it was true! Sure enough true girl. And you, what about you, she asked me? Shit, I am faking it. I am a good faker, I am just trying to show I am spunky too. Let me lay this on you, I said to her as I dug up an old cliche, that seemed appropriate and dropped it on her, ” What doesn’t kill you, will only make you stronger.” Got that right, she replied smiling and glancing up at me, getting to her feet and then trusting her arms up stretching in the cool morning air, like she don’t got a care, in the world. You want a coffee, asked Judy? No, perhaps in a week or too, when I feel like I know what’s this new life has in store for me, right now, I know it’s early but, I think I’ll take a drink, said Saddie.
What’s that?
Rum.
Rum, boy you don’t play around.
Oh, yes I do, she laughed ha, ha, ha!
She reached into her bag and pulled out a tiny brown bottle, twisted the cap off and drank a shot straight from it like it was orange juice, put the cap back on, and blew out some air, and looked me, and said, OK, honey, let’s hit the highway! Go! What highway? Ha, ha, ha, Both of them were now wearing clothing they had taken from suitcases, they brought out of the ship. They had, lots and lots of clothes, and very expensive high heeled shoes. Which were useless in the sand and dirt that surrounded them, but psychologically, wow! It was a blast to have, and mentally comforting to boot. Judy had on jeans and a yellow tank top, Saddie wore black pants and a pink blouse and rapt her brunette hair with the blond lock in it, into a big bun.
They were just raring to go, when Judy said, you know what?
What?
I know I shouldn’t say this, but should we tell this dude?
BR!
Dam, your right BR!
He knows this place after all, this is his camp, and like he says he’s the boss-man.
[ 190 ]
Year.
Ok, may you shouldn’t have said it, but you did, so like I didn’t hear you, said Saddie, waving her hand for judy to follow her, as she headed out walking to go exploring. Judy smiled taking her lead, and smiled in agreement, as they headed out, destination unknown.
So, Judy and Saddie, were a little nervous but excited, and casually wondered off for an early morning stroll to get in a little sight seeing and check out the new landscape of their new world, and they headed off aimlessly at first, but then decided to head toward a tall sandy hill with rock sticking out cropping on its top, thinking it’s perfect, and once on top it’s got to have a great view. too!
They were eager to get a look over the other-side, and see, what they could see! They are surprised, that they are not the only ones with that idea!
And, to find it’s occupied already, by two other early risers, from the camp!
Two young ladies, a Miss Barni House, who was an English black woman, thin five foot,’ who was a music classical coach teacher. She’s petite, cute, big eyes, large black pupils, and had her done hair in a natural round shaped retro afro’ hair style, of the free wheeling Hippies days. And, this woman, Beth Thomson. She’s a Oceanologist specialist from the states, who had a high voice, looked like very teacher’ly and conservative, but today, she’s letting it all hang out, cause she got saved, and is elaborating that, by getting nice and drunk, with one of her new acquaintance, her friend Barni, both of whom stayed up most of the night bouncing emotionally, between happiness and sadness, over their fate and ruined lives and love ones who are now presumed dead, and the totality of their futures lost.
. So, they joined up with them, and converse awhile, up until Saddie, noticed a tiny spec of a figure up against the blue of the morning mist of the sky, way in the distance. It looked like a man, and by his appearance he looked somehow familiar, it’s BR! Took awhile, to walk all that, but finally he reaches the bottom of the hill, looks up! He joins the ladies. And all eyes are on him, as he climbs up to get to them sitting on top!
Barni, looks on, smiles curiously, and asked him casually, Who are you? I am the man who saved your life, have you forgotten?
No, I know that I mean besides that, who are you?
Besides that, Besides that? Do you trivialize that, like its nothing? If that’s the case maybe I shouldn’t have? No, please, please, that came out wrong. Don’t, don’t take, take it the wrong way BR, please! I would like to know, I mean I am just asking you, you no know, . . .
[ 191 ]
Who are you?
BR, who to the surprise of the ladies, had clean up his act, from looking like a wild-man dude, to a sharp guy, still donning his bullet hole riddled cowboy hat, though, now he
smelled good, looked good, no blood stains, no mud, even changed his clothes, into new digs, with a fresh pair of gap bluejeans to boot, that he stole from somebodies suitcase, out of the boat! He had his low slung gun-holsters and was packing his guns dangling one, on each side of his legs, which looked muscular, to the girls as they checked him out! He got a small tight ass, thought Saddie, to herself and laughed!
His new look featured, a face with a trimmed beard, and mustache that was becoming, that caught the ladies admiring eyes. He flashed a good morning ladies to them and flashed a good looking bright set of, recently brushed teeth. In his smiling face, as he looked at Barni, who looked like she felt blessed with him here amongst them! He looked at her, like she was an un-openned Christmas present, and playfully toyed with her using a litany of what only can be described as verbal mind games,
but, first he made himself comfortable laying down between them, and folding his hands behind his head, as he looked at her, then a second later, pulled his cigarettes, patted him self down like he was searching for matches, then asked,
You got a light?
Sure , Barni replied handing him her lighter.
Thanks, he said lighting up and inhaling deeply, then exhaled handing it back, with a tiny smirk on his face, squinting his black eyes at her as he said ,
You asked me who are you?
Year, just curious.
What’s your name?
[ 192 ]
Barni, Barni House, she replied in one of her best sexy voices. But, me hey, cowboy, my friends call me Barni, she smiled, replying in an extra warm voice drawing out every syllable of her english accent!
What do you think, Barni? Can who be?
Could it be me?
What, she said, not understanding, and suddenly shifting un-comfortably in her seat on the sand. She now, definitely had the boss man’s attention, but, contrary to what everyone thought, he was no fool, but instead, it was becoming painfully aware, it was he, who was playing her psychologically like a dunce and imbecile. She was being played by a spade! Testing her, to see what she was made of mentally.
“No, I mean who are you?” She said, sitting up quickly with a curious look on her face, like a character who had been put through a meat grinder mentally. His starlike confidence, made the ladies sit up right away mentally, and take notice, questioning whether he was really just a dangerous madman nut, or just pretending? He didn’t smile but looked earnestly at her and asked,
Who could be me? No who, not what, What side of who of the first side of
Who do you think I am? Who? Just who do you think? Who do you think I am?
[ 193 ]
Who the hell do you think I am man?
Come on say it? Say it, demanding, who? Who, he said raising his voice ominously, getting the women psychologically unsettled, and a wee bit scared.
I mean I try to be nice, I mean I tried to save your life, right, that was nice?
You are. Aw yes, you, you are nice, said barn nervously, her voice had lost the warm depth to it, now, it was kind of trembling.
That was?
Yes, it was! It was, she murmured.
Was that? He quizzed her, with his words, with a strange artistry, like a bull fighter, casually pointing his sword in a Spanish bull fighting ring. The sword would go in, and bull would sing! Indeed, she was right, she was perfectly right to ask, who was he?
Oh definitely, that was very nice! Barni, answered, trying her best to sound, both lucky and thankful, and grateful all at the same time!
Wasn’t that?
Why anybody can see that, he commented, he rattled off his words fast, to what, to him was something obvious! Anybody, she asked, first looking at him, as if in agreement, then, glancing her eyes quickly, at the other women seated around her for support, but they were silent! Their lips zipped! Like as if they were not there! But they were, and they realized : this was a cat and mouse game, and this mouse was a powerful, Micky mouse, on drugs, no less! And they were going to be bystanders, and were going to sit back and watch the Micky eat her alive!
Barni was petrified, her eyes bugging out, she was not just awed, but speechless, not knowing where, or what, this madman, was going to do.
There was a slowly building up of a tension, as the man and the women seemed living in two worlds, existing on two side of a line, an unseen line based in the confines of the minds journey beginning with a contrast, between the accepted norms of the ladies, and the twisted inner self of BR’s paragon reality, operating out fascinatingly in his wish for the way he wanted the world to be, but in controlled.
Who, no! Ask me how many? He told her!
How many?
Go ahead!
How , how how many, asked Barni
stuttering,now frightened of him, and chain smoking like a steam engine, trying to stay calm, hoping the next puff might relax her! It was obvious. . . She mentally couldn’t handle this dude, This guy, all dressed up, disguised, in his old time cowboy get up,
had her out classed, out witted, out gunned, out brained and was giving a verbal licking! And that was not good, not cool at all! And she thought, “If a crazy man can do that, then he’s not crazy!”
But, now this pretending crazy guy, asks
[ 194 ]
How many baby spiders must a mother spider have to guarantee one will survive?
What, she asked, clueless, and befuddled, and blinking her eyes frequently?
They have come by, and by! And visit this cool midtown top brand store, to do, their thing, which was stealing, now like, you roll it up, find a spot, park, do your thing in the store, swipe this that, like a black cat, when the clerk is distracted. And walk out quickly, if you get spotted, and the alarm buzzer sounds, you, y’all stay calm, you say,” oh it must be my phone alarm, right?” Un-perturbed, Cause nine times out of ten, the store doesn’t want bad publicity. So no cops, they let you go! The sales person, if she’s cool, will let you go, especially if you nice, right? Right? He demanded, an answer, like as if she knew what the hell this man was talking about!
[ 195 ]
Suddenly, interrupted Saddie, hell year, been there , done that cat! I can, cause I did it and dude it, dude, Ha, ha, ha! Saddie was the one who had engaged him with daring flair, verbally down in the hole of the ship, she knew he was mad, or bordering on a mad, that is undefinable, a lunacy that is crime-able, and off the walls, and the only way, she was to get over on him, was to appease him, but with a patient long term agenda, based on Bull S___. And she had hers, and it was simple! Come out on top!
She played along, figuring this guy out, sometimes he’s cool sane as can be, other times he’s not! The trick was, just to wait him out patiently.
The others girls, were clueless as to why she put her two sense in, but, saddie might say she was bold and funky, but she had another side to her too. She had subtle intricacies to her character, that made her personality be able to go up against BR, and stretch over lines of reality with him, as if the mentally dancing! From extreme introversion to extreme extraversion to exhibitionist! And now, BR, turns his head and looks at her, recognizers her, remembers her from down in the blackness of the ship, and without missing a beat says, you impressed me, last night, Saddie, when you went over to try to comfort the Captain! Thanks, she said smiling, looking into his eyes, as he looked in to hers, and though the words that were being spoken was saying one thing, their body language was saying something totally different, these two are attracted to each other, but don’t dare want to admit it.
They were talking and saying something else, but their tone of voice and eyes were betraying them!
Then BR said,
“Who you he naked her?”
What, said Saddie? She said what, curiously, and feeling just as blind sighted, as poor Barni, who now stayed quiet watching and confused on the sidelines! Now, Judy, checking this shit out, was tired of being a pent up bystander, raring to but in, she thought she could handle him, cause being a nurse, she had lots of experience and had to study a little psychology in school, but, the underlying point was this guys ability to be cagey, cagey and wild as a fox, dangerous as wolf with the bite of a cobra! Whats going on inside of him? Whats in his flame? Fire? Or lunacy, or both? She thought, she could game him play him, but this guy, he had just thrown her a curve ball, she didn’t expect right out of the blue, but realizing it was game of deep complex wit, she paused and played it cool, took her time and took a drag on her cigarette real slowly. Looked away from his eyes, away from his manly gaze, and stayed momentarily quiet, then, came back at him, cool as a cunning, drunk hound dog on a Saturday night, and said in low sexy voice that would melt a man in to butter, asking him,
[ 196 ]
“Who she him naked him?”
Well, when he heard that! It was game changer! He, turned did a double take, and now, it was he, was the one who stayed silent now, but he was feign·ing pretending looking at her cocky and boldly! Where, as, she checked him out, did the same body language wise back to him, and they both stared boldly at each other for about a minute, looking for weakness, in matched eruditeness, without none of the five people on the mountain daring to butt in, or say a word, not a sound! You could hear a pin drop. The macho tension, man, girl thing was hot! That’s how quiet it got!
Then, BR, hungry to change the topic, and let the pressure off, pretended to noticed a scent in the air. He sniffed, sniff, sniff!
He looks and turns his head around in slow motion, like the devil he is, and looks at Barni, who’s now smiling, un controllably at him, and whose been drinking heavily all night, and notices she has a roach in her hand.
Wooo, what’s, what’s that I smell, sniff sniff, asked BR, as he turns to look back at Barni? It’s a Spankdust! Smells like good weed, it is, we call it Spankdust, back home! Can I have a tok? Why not? Take it, says Barni, bending over with her left handing it to him in his right. Well, says BR, it’s been a long time since I done any spanking, but with this, who knows? He inhaled, smiled looked up, then down at it, and commented smiling! Good, weed. Stuff gets me bugging, so if you notice me not acting my normal, calm, intelligent self, and change a little, you’ll no why, he said smiling, as he took a drag, inhaled it, then it started :
[ 197 ]
You? You, he said, nodding his head toward Judy, holding the weed out in her direction, meaning if she wanted a tok or puff. She didn’t say anything, but thinking to her self, she really wanted to, but didn’t want to give him an inch, and besides, she was clever enough to know that to deal with him, being that he was crazy as a fox and deadly as a crocodile, she needed all her wits about her. She can always relax and party later. So, she shook her head saying no, but then looked him straight in the eye, and said coldly. I am already high! You want to get me higher, so you can abuse me? Maybe? He said. Hey, I can use some abuse, remarked Saddie, laughing, who up until now was quiet as a mouse, let me get some, she said holding out her hand. Say let me get some please, Boss! Let me get a puff please, Boss! BR handed it to her, she inhaled and smiled handing it back. Judy’s face, was smile-less, looked at him firm, like a out of touch, un hip, so out of it, stuck-up, school teacher, who needs to be taught, a lesson in life!
[ 198 ]
The other lady, Miss Thomson, she’s quite not so different, but, given the circumstances, she, who also was quiet all this time too! Thinks, after all what they been through, this is the time to get high, so she pours a drink in a shot glass and hands it to him. But he looks at it, shakes his head and declines, saying, Naw, thanks, I’am good! So she downs it her self. Hey, who are you, asked BR looking at Judy, who ignores him, and turned her face away from him, and glanced around at the wilderness before her. She pretended to be more engrossed in the view then them. Then all of sudden, BR, audaciously, makes like, a comedian, and makes believe he is a participant on some crazy TV reality show and says jokingly: I am Judy, when she’s old, sitting in a wheel chair waiting for her doctor in his waiting room, he said
[ 199 ]
changing his voice and demeanor, imitating the sound of an old lady,
“Hey gag’ nabbit, dammit, yo, hey nurse, Yo, can you tell me why, I say can you tell me, why the Doctor, is late? I, been waiting here, for hours.” Well, he said changing his voice again to sound like an imaginary receptionist, well, he he’s not late. He’s not? No, he’s tardy delayed! God dammit, he not tardy or delayed, he’s late, late is late! Late, I say he’s late, I say he tardy! Late. Delayed! He is delayed, said the imaginary receptionist getting all bent out of shape! Then he changed his voice again and brought out another personality of an old man, pretending to be some kind of mediator between the two arguing women, Now Y’all hold on one cotton minute here! I say hold on one rotten moment, as security I got to say I got to say, Y’all can’t be yelling and causing a ruckus inside the doctors office! I have heard y’all yelling and I can’t allow altercations inside the doctor office! You two, better just calm your selves down, do you hear! Or! Or what, he yelled angrily at himself, interrupting that character speaking and imitating somebody else, I will have you, and you both of you removed!
[ 200 ]
Then BR who is on a roll letting out a bunch of hidden personalities surface, suddenly says, imitating and old style ring tone, RING RING, he picks up, hello this Julia from the North American Storm Environmental research agency. We are doing polls and surveys : did you experience any flooding or earth quakes recently in your area ?
You got to be kidding sugar, he exclaims, BR, pretending to be shocked by the question he heard, looks upset!
He’s talking into a phone, What world you on? Did, I said, did you notice the earth done up a split in two? Huh? Go look out your window honey? What do you see? I bet you it ain’t pretty? Now get off my phone and don’t you ever call me again, do y’all hear? Now, Big Rex, without missing a beat, continues this farce, fantasy!
Now, y’all know , he continues, I can’t allow no altercations in the doctors office, whether he’s a little late or little delayed!
Y’all know the law, no ruckuses in the doctors office.
[ 201 ]
Judy, thinking quickly to her self that this is just a gag, a farce, that BR, is indulging his fantasies in. She remembers the time when she was a student in med school, in her class of, “Psychoanalysis,” the Professor would encourage students to momentarily engage verbally in the hallucinatory conversations of patients to help them transcend and climb over and out! She, ambitiously jumps right into his daydreaming and suddenly turns his Monologue in to a Dialogue, and said to him,
who said you cant allow a ruckus? Lots of things I do that I am not supposed to and so do you! All we doing is expressing ourselves, and we ain’t lying. The doctor is not late, is not delayed he is just running a little behind, that’s all!
OH no he’s not! He’s not running a little behind, he got a big behind Big big behind, that’s so big he can’t run!
Judy listening to this intently, shakes her head, tries to be logical, ponders to her self privately for a moment, and tries to be objective, knowing from her studies that the bridge to the mind to this man sitting opposite her, his immediate reality requires a system of analysis wrought with and buttressed by compelling specific Psychotherapies, she only wishes she had, so she could intelligent de-mask, and proceed to decipher him, and his behaviors causality, but despite the deep questions and concerns, she holds about him, on top of which, add the fact that she secretly considers him her patient, he eludes and evades with cunning her attempts to pigeon hold him down to do a character analysis, and penetrate his multiple ego defenses! What a complex guy, she thinks to her self. She nevertheless finds him challenging and despite herself, she wonders and puts in doubt her interest in him? Is it purely a secret psychological nurse patient relationship she desires, or is there in her, a growing self awareness of a latent emergent female attraction to him?
Could I have a tiny crush on him, she questions her self, can’t be he is a nut, and not a nice guy, perhaps funny but he is so sick. No, can’t be, I can’t be attracted to him, the thought of it was more than atrocious, it was totally ludicrous.
[ 202 ]
Still now that he’s cleaned up and looks good, she knows that looks are deceiving and even if she were to indulge and expose her feelings just a little for him, could he, this barbarian in sheep’s clothing be capable of love? Could he or would he be just a drive by lover? She doesn’t even know if he likes her, but still if she showed interest and he shows interest, will she exposes her heart to him. Would he come to her to take her into arms in ardent love lust and deep intercourse her madly, and sadly when done toss her aside like an opened Christmas present box, yesterdays news, and old sock? That happens a lot!
He sits there laying down in front of her conversing with us all, now she thinks, her secret thoughts that are whirling and dancing in her head, as she turns to do what she’s too, shy to do, to glance quickly into his eyes which are looking at hers as if waiting to pounce. His eyes were piecing her soul, she could feel them on her making her feel happy but yet, at the same time vulnerable unexplainably?
He smiled and looked like he about to say something to her, but who would be talking to her, another hidden personality or him, who ever him is?
But, enough heavy thinking, she says to her self, right now he is genuinely funny and she dying to laugh but is doing her best to hold it in. He was releasing his own special brand of a personality game play, and the other girls were loving it and she reluctantly [/color], although she didn’t want to admit it she was too!
Well, the ladies listening, including stubborn Judy, are bewildered and awe-struct listening to this mans non stop funny rants, they burst out laughing ha, ha, ha…
[ 203 ]
BR, burst out laughing, Ha, ha, ha. Then Judy burst out laughing too, ha, ha, ha!
Suddenly Judy really broke up laughing loud as hard as she could! She reached the point of this is got to be too much of a joke, and found all this hilarious, and cracked up so hard her face turned red, ha, ha, ha. she blushed, and kept on laughing
Barni, Laughed and cried too, realizing she had been played! Was this was just BR’s way of teasing and playing around, with the ladies?
The gig was up!
[ 204 ]
He smiled, then crushed his cigarette out on a rock, and looked at each of them, and said seriously. Now listen up, It’s been a pleasure making your acquaintance ladies. I like you, got up early, not to look at the scenery. I got up at the crack of dawn and walked a mile or two, not because I wanted too! I got up, cause I needed to get things straight in my head!
I am gone be responsible for all y’all. And I am gone need some volunteers to help me!
Everyday volunteers making and serving dinner.
Lets say each day at four sharp. And helping organize and being done by six!
I hope you can be there today, or get me some folks who will.
Will you guys help, he asked them seriously?
[ 205 ]
They looked at each other nodding their heads with one another and agreed, and Judy, said sure!
Besides that I try to get these people up, and will have a meeting this morning to lay some new laws down!
Thanks, I am going need all the help I can get, he said getting to his feet, and then said something very telling:
I like bugs! Bumble buggers and Bees, Bumble bees, Are my favorites! There are nearly 20,000 known species of bees, they form a structure, a way of living! A hive, which they defend with their lives!
This, is their kingdom, and this camp is mine! In my camp. There are Queen bees! I am their king! And in my kingdom, for it too survive! It will be, characterized by having a cooperative brood, and a division of labour into reproductive and non-reproductive adults! Bees navigate using spatial memory, and we with our memory will also be guided, like a magic compass, pointing to our future survival
And ladies and Queen bees, here’s the hard part!
There will be days, and days, when I do things you might not like or understand. I do things that you hate! But I got to do what I think I need, need to, too! To be successful! I also got to enforce discipline, for the benefit of all our survivors! If that day comes, don’t hold it against me. Don’t! I am just doing what I got too! Then without saying anything else, the man, proceeded to turn and walked down the other side of the hill, toward the camp. And as he walked away, his size got smaller, but in their eyes, became bigger! And as he came, so he went, and was gone!
BUT GONE WHERE?
[ 206 ]
Stay tune chapter 9 is a crime!
CHAPTER 9
The Tweets of Madcow Sammy
BAD PERSONALITIES
BIG REX
Chapter 9
[ 207 ]
It was early still in the morning, theres was about, a little more than a hundred twenty people in the camp, now. The kids were already up, but lots of adult folks was still sleeping, some didn’t sleep but cried all night, some were in shock, others were drowning their pain and lost in liquor and drugs, either way he came walking around where they were sleeping and waking them up, he was now with one thing on his mind, and that was laying down his new laws.
BR, knew what he had to do. The man, Neither knew. His words were going to make some people blue. And he might even have to kill a few!
He had to give these people, he saved, hope. Hope was something hard for him to give. Neither he nor they could barely cope. Hope was hard, a hard thing to believe in!
But he had to give it!
[ 208 ]
He knows his head was bad, but today, he has to straighten up and think straight, make sense, other wise. Every body, including him is going to die! All these people he saved need to eat, and food in the boat gone be sour sweet, and about to run out! He was born and raised in a democracy to be free, free to think, speak and pee! But since he’s the one that knows how to survive, it can’t be run like a democracy right now!
He’s going to have to act like a king! And they not gone understand that!
He’s always been, bad, But now. He’s gone be bad, might even have to kill some people, to do good, long term!
He knows nobody gone understand him, but he’s got to do what a man like him, got to do!
Big rex, walked close to the campers resting on the ground, and thought to himself : I have to tell them what to do, and when to do it. He’s going to have to explain to them why he’s going be a dictator!
Well, walking into the camp that day, BR checked out all the people that were laying on blankets on the ground, half awake, with a leery eye on him.
Then, he raised up his voice and spoke loud so everybody could hear him!
Listen up wake up! Pay attention! Like told y’all before, My name is Big Rex. Or BR, I can’t say good morning, to you, knowing in my heart, it’s not a good morning for anybody! I am a tad cranky. Year that’s true! I seen better days! And so have you!
I know y’all, been crying, and didn’t get no sleep last night! Ya, see, what I said is true!
The world done gone and exploded. Exploded in two! One Earth up above your head, and one where you’re laying on the ground! Ain’t, no more world! As we known it!
As you can tell by all the destruction, you can see, everywhere, all around, all the people are dead!
No. It can’t be! Y’all say? But, you see it wit,’ your own eyes! Wo, wo. No! But hell, this is it. This is our world today!
I been born, and raised in the streets, never had nothing, now I got less! And this world as it is, gives me head ache, and a major bad attitude problem!
Now life as we all knows it. Is gone! Gone, gone! Gone be bad!
It’s too much for ya. It hurts so bad. And you and your baby say, why?
And things, been down, and it was too much for you, and, and that’s why, oh year, you know what? I gotta talk, talk to you today.
And I know if somebody ask ya, what’s wrong with ya boy? You gonna say I lost everything. It hurts so bad. It’s too much for me to say good by, to the world, I know! I, like you, I been, walking the back streets of my mind, and crying! Crying over it! Oh year, but folks please listen . I gotta tell ya, we can’t, I say we can’t say good bye, can’t give up!
Now what I going to say, you ain’t gone like. So I know y’all just woke up, and all! But I am gone be responsible or all y’all. And gone keep saying that cause that’s true!
I am gone tell you like it is. We got so much folks here. Kids and old folks, and all! Lotta mouths to feed!
[ 209 ]
We need laws. We need order! I am gone tell you what to do. And you gone do what I say! If you don’t listen I gone put your ass back in the bottom of the boat! I can’t deal with problems! I got so many already! Don’t make any for me! I gotta enough! Just trust me and do what I say!
Oldsters, take forever, when we’re in a hurry. Do your part as best you can! Don’t make me kill anybody!
Maybe later we’ll have a democracy, but not now! This is not a democracy. So I tell ya what I want, he said.
I ain’t got enough of nothing, to give you.
Shelter, if it rains! I got a cave near by that’s big enough.
Food, I got scraps from the boat!
Clothes we rob suitcases out of the boat!
Schools? I am the schools, I’ll teach ya, how to survive! But, if, if you get bad grades, this teacher will kill ya!
Doctors we’re lucky, two of the passengers are Doctors!
We got one Obstetrician, that’s good news for the ladies!
So we got two Doctors. They don’t speak a lot of english. They speak Chinese, and our devices, translators watches, can translate for now, but the batteries are running low. I am saying that, just so you know!
So listen up, stop crying and listen up cause I am only going to say this once!
Y’all, not gone like what I gotta say today, but what I got to say. I got to say!
[ 210 ]
Warriors?
Yes!
All you men! I need men to be warriors, he suddenly announced to the crowd!
I need you. I need you, BR, said again, loudly, prancing around with his hands behind his back, like lumbering bear on attack!
He was being very emotionally angry about something, so much so it looked like smoke was rising from the top of his cowboy hat! BR, was grimacing, his eyes alight, an angry, but what he was about to say to them, was going to be like a bombshell, hitting everybody like stunning, shockwave, right between the eyes!
I need fighters willing to die, defending us against them. See, before I found you! Before I came down into the boat, I realized I was not the only one to survived in this god forsaken world! Oh no!
There others, others, who turned into cannibals, ragged disgraceful, defeated in spirit, disadvantaged in the mind,
who were losers! I saw them, I saw them! And I hated them!
[ 211 ]
They were a tribe! Yes, others, there are others, who survived too! Who want to eat you! That, now roam the earth hunting to kill anybody they find to eat them!
We need warriors!
I saw them, you see before the upper earth, went up higher, it was closer. I don’t where they came from. Upper or lower earth?
All I know, we got to be prepared! All I know, we got to be prepared, he yelled out this time, louder, this time he said in a guttorial way, emphasizing his point!
I need you to understand that the blue cannibals, I saw, might find my camp full of people, and attack. You wouldn’t like that!
They have a strange Oder that I can smell. I saw them, I saw them. Some are running with spears, and are naked! Hunger is core reason for this contagion, to do this! It spreads! It’s starts and we are all programmed to be afraid of certain primal fears, staving to death is one of our main fears! It can turn us from human, back to beast!
[ 212 ]
Fear is one of the most potent contagion’s, that is highly contagious! This fear of going hungry, is a self fulfilling prophesy. It’s, here with us, he said pointing to his temple, his head, since the beginning of time, . . he said!
It’s what drives men, sane men, teachers, and professors, poor and rich alike, to this abominable shame! I saw a disproportional amount of teenager boys and girls, running with them. Hungry!
Hungry!
They turned on each other, and they are a danger!
These ragged groups of men turned cannibals, who paint their bodies with blue oils that came out of the earth. I am positive they don’t know I am here. They didn’t see me spying on them. They don’t know I am here! But, if one of those devils, returns back, they might find out, out that I brought you up, out the boat! And there lots of people to eat here!
They’ll come back!
That, they’ll know we are here! If they know we are here, and come. That’s why I want an army , an army to fight. If they ever come this way again we will fight them. We will be ready!
So! I know you just got out of the boat and are weak, but I will feed you, make you strong!
Hear my words, Do you know, now why I want warriors! Do I get men who, who want to be warriors? Do I get men ready to fight? Do I get you to be with me in our hour, when we are most vulnerable?
Who amongst you, who will join me to build an army? Big Rex, asked turning his head and scanning the width and breath of the people before him!
If you willing to be a warrior, tell me, let me know now! Who? Raise your hands, he demanded, raising up his hands high in the air! And soon, others raised clenched fists. They raised their hands! Well, the hands went up. The crowd didn’t hesitate. Even women, and girls wanted to fight!
Now listen! Year, I am different than you! I dress like one of them old time cowboys, I like it, that’s just my style, doesn’t mean I am wild.
Do not dismiss this, I know I yanked you from this, death, to survive, but now to hear that you might hunted, for your flesh, it’s nuts! But, I did not promise you paradise, did I? But, life and, life is what it is! This!
You can cry later, . . Now, I need you to learn to be fighters, soldiers, to guard and protect the females here with us! Without them, our specie dies. All you women, got to be pregnant soon! Yes, you heard me, time is both a friend and our enemy! I have a friend her name is Sally! What I have learned, is the position you were born into!
Is not the position where you gonna die! So If, mind you, I say, If, we all still alive, next year, we got new babies! Lots of babies next year! Lots of them! We gotta double our population quick! And if sex is the trick, we got the stick!
Before the world blew up, we had it good! Dam right said BR, in a low voice under his breath, as if he was talking to himself!
I think y’all all agree? We had cool places, like restaurants, saloons, pubs, coffee shops, that were chock-full of prime people-watching opportunities, but no more! Ladies and gents, what you see is what you get!
So, ladies don’t wait for mister, Right. He ain’t coming! He’s most likely dead! Take what you can get! There’re good men here! Our future depends on it! And we depend on you! So women, You want to talk to me? Talk to me!
[ 213 ]
Next! Workers!
I need workers. Not bench, warmers! Workers, is what I need. Yes, indeed! Workers, willing to play an organized, central role, in trying to do farming, Yes sir! There’s lots of tomato seeds, and other seeds, corn, potatoes, and vegetables we got out of the boat, so planting seeds every day, will make this camp a better place for everyone. So all you men, if you cannot become a warrior, and don’t think you want to work, listen up! Don’t be a jerk! No women for you, or worse, if you don’t work, forget about it! You want a woman? You talk to me first, if I say so. Then it is so! I’am going to be their protector! You don’t like what I am saying, you don’t like my laws! You think it got flaws! Then go back, go back down, from out where I took ya! You heard me! Get yer, dam ass, back into the bottom of that boat. If that’s what you prefer! I can arrange that, easy for ya! One, two, three! See me!
You got a complaint? Tell me about it! If, you’re thinking of leaving the camp, the answer is no! Run-aways, will be hunted down and caught, and be en-slaved! You heard me! No rights! None! Think about it! I swear, if you are not with me, you’re against me!
Like I said before, . . . I am gone be responsible for you. You gone be responsible to respect and help me anyway you can, by the same token, no way should you take me for granted or underestimate me!
[ 214 ]
I saved you, and I can un-save you!
Y’all life is gone get better, but it got to get worse first! This ain’t no free lunch! We got to learn to be better than damage goods. It’s gone be a marriage, between you and me to stay alive you see, trust me! My name is BIg Rex, BR, and like I said, but unless I tell you otherwise, when you address me, call me boss! Boss, wit a capital B! If anybody got a problem with that, I’ll kill’ em!
This here is my camp. You in it! I put ya in it! This is my Bumble Bugga land! Me? I like honey, I like Honey bees! I like bugs. And, I call my camp, Bumble Bee City. So, that’s it! Now you know! Now you know where the hell you are!
Listen up, I welcome you! At the same time, I swear, if you cause me any problems. I’ll put you back in the boat!
Now, open your ears! No, you are not gone sit around crying all day! Life is all you got. It’s all you gonna have! Don’t make me take it away from you! Listen to me! I want you to trust me. Listen to me!
I’ll make you survive! You gonna look around, and get depressed. And think you cannot live like this. You can’t survive! I’ll make you survive!
[ 215 ]
Big Rex spoke on a lot of topics, and then he said. Ah’ year. Something I wanted to mention, in this meeting!
What I want you to know, is, . . . I can get y’all Virtual Reality stuff, like glasses, so you can remember how the old Earth was. No internet, needed just mind power stuff! So talk to me if you’re interested.
I know some of y’all still got money in your wallets So, if you have lost as much as I have, but don’t want to give in, and give up! Maybe, If you like to go VR, and see how things used to be. Maybe you’ll do it, just bring back good time memories, or other people might need it, for Post traumatic stress disorders, therapy! Any how, if interested. See me after the meeting!
So, it was, . . . Yet, for reasons outside of our comprehension, destinies intervention,
It must have read, his mind, greedy, to exploit, the frailties of the bugs he dragged out of the bottom of the ship. BR, told the bugs he was the big Boss! And, he took out of boat something he kept secret about. But, now, he lays his secret cards on the table, at the meeting! He wants to let the people get access to see the Earth world, the cities, the stories, and places before the world was destroyed! BR, has VR, glasses that he will let them use, for cash, gold, and jewelry! But no credit cards!
BR, he found some VR, glasses aboard the ship in suitcases. And they were in good condition too! No internet needed, just your mind power!
You know the type! You know the type, invented a long long time ago. The VR, glasses with recumbent AR, that work powered by the minds signals.
BR, wanted the bugs to pay up, if they want to use his toys, that will be allowing folks to revisit the world, that they lost! How much is it worth it to you? To see it again, he asked himself Seems like he’s showing he’s an entrepreneur! Albeit a crazy one!
For those few minutes of VR, memories, of happiness he wants you pay him. How? With, money or what ever you got for sale? What is it about Big Rex? These people just came out of that boat! They are mentally distraught, beaten , exhausted, depressed, and bewildered, but yet, he shows no love or empathy for them. He says he does, but by his actions it’s obvious, he’s not concerned!
[ 216 ]
He’s got access to the hardware, cause he can go down searching in the boat, whenever he wants!
You can’t go in the boat unless he says so! So, BR, lets teenagers working for him, go down searching for VR glasses and other bidirectionally mind powered,
optical cross-link technology, offline
glasses, along with any interfaces, that they can retrieve! This, he said they can do, as long as it’s not ruined by water, or fire, he will give them prizes!
After all, these ship’s passengers, they were very affluent people, and had lots gadgets, lots of devices, and VR, contact lens, and VR glasses, and one of the compelling features of the application it works on is your natural brainwave operating system. And it’s like you’re dreaming, the action of dreaming, and imagining creates biological brain patterns movements, that can be tracked.
Yep, Even though you’re are not really using your eyes, or ears, or arms or legs in real reality, only in Virtual reality!
And, so, it’s those, signals created, that can be harvested, retrieved as data and read, and tricking your mind into thinking you are someplace real, when you are not! Y’all been using this stuff in games! So y’all know how it works!
[ 217 ]
It works easily, with today’s technology, using interpretive, connectivity signals, it gets powered by, and from your brain, and turns the glasses on, and lets you passengers, see, and virtually visit popular scenes, cities, and famous tourists attractions, and iconic places, they are headed for, before they arrive.
Now, I ask you! Wouldn’t you want to see the world as it was, before it got destroyed?
BR, turn smart salesmen? Is his behavior understandable? Or do you think he should bypass the opportunity to make money?
When he was a kid, he sold drugs, and a guy that used to buy from him, was a wealthy man, a rich investor, who was a scientist, that spent an afternoon chatting with him. And that was the first time, he got introduced to cognitive nuero science, in physics! The man got high, really high, and to see and to hear this old man, acting so funny, BR, secretly recorded what he was saying. He still has the audio, tape files on his phone files, some where!
Anyhow, the old man, was funny! And he was drinking too! And the old guy, was happily rapping to him about brain waves, and something he called event resolution imaging, and a lot of other technical stuff like : ways to put people under his control by using VR, glasses! He said, he was studying semi classical quantum mechanics, how brain waves could be used to encode information, and he thought he could make codes, to control brain activity, and thoughts!
And the scientist talked and talked and making funny jokes as he kept rapping, about how to do all this stuff!
BR, he didn’t understand anything, but he was impressed about VR, and what it meant! And what if you could control people?
So, when he came across by accident, some VR, glasses in the boat, it was a big deal. A winner in his mind. He thought, at some point, he would turn these VR, glasses into cash!
Begs the question, do you like, . . . Like you, and like you, dare be greedy too, if given the opportunity?
[ 218 ]
Now, what he didn’t tell anybody, was because of the circumstances he finds himself in, he thought, it might be a good thing to go looking to see if he can locate those old tapes files! And listen to those old recordings now, to see if he could learn how to control these peoples minds, using those instructions, he has! But that’s for a later time! He had let his mind drift, but now he’s back paying attention, and stopped meandering around, and stood stiffly in front of the people and said loudly, like some type of army commander!
OK?
It’s time to lock and load, survival classes are mandatory, after breakfast starting today. Dinner is at 6 pm I expect volunteers to cook and hand out the food, each day sign up or don’t expect to eat!
Judy and Saddie and Barni, and Beth Thomson, or Tee, had stayed on the hill hanging out BS’ing about everything under the sun and what’s on their and other people minds, and basically didn’t get back to the camp till late, It was something after one o’clock in the afternoon, when they got back toasted, and walking funny! It was at that time they were looking for a little hot coffee, and that’s when they met up with this guy making some at the camp. The guys name was Baxter and he told them about the meeting he went to that morning, cause BR, said he wanted folks to attend survival classes, he was gone give after breakfast! So anyway Baxter went. And said it was kind of cool. The old guy, he called BR old, since he, Baxter, was a real young guy, just seventeen. Well he told them that BR, wanted the women to take on the responsibility to repopulate the world,
He said all reproductive girls and women of all ages, need to get pregnant in a month!
[ 219 ]
And that the guys needed to become fit, and do exercises to become strong, and ready to become soldiers to defend the camp, and enforce discipline. Sounds like he thinks we are a country or something? It was kind of neat, and all the stuff he said. He sounded like a preacher one minute, and a soldier the next. He was using a bunch of extension cords down linked to the boat, to the computer screen, he brought out of the ship. And with just battery power, he was able to show us some pictures, using recumbent networking gestural I/O with flawless G speak gesture recognition hardware. He’s quite a cowboy, and I was listening to him, he appears to trying to hide the fact, that he knows a lot, and to me he was appearing to be humble. Fact is he seems crazy some times, but still he got a quite a head on his shoulders.
Baxter smiling and nodding his head, said he is looking forward to the next meeting. And that he thought, BR was a real hard core type man. That he knew a lot of the things about living outdoors, and he took them to a cave he knew about. He called it a cavern, and well, he took us all. All of us were able to fit in it, cause it was huge and deep with high ceilings. And guess what he said excitedly? Its got water, water in it, but, but it’s boiling hot coming out of the earth! But BR, he said in time it would get cold and we could use it to bathe in it. Judy listened to him. The young mans eyes were bright, and he spoke admiringly and enthusiastically about BR. BR said, he’d a figure out a way to make sure prizes are given to people who excelled as fighters and warriors. And said, the kid excitedly, later this month after we get all organized and stuff, he would make another expedition to try to get some bikes, Harley Davidson bikes the Captain told him were down there in the ship. And that would be so cool, and he said, if they are successful in finding them. And if they are successful in getting them out, cause they are heavy, and it would need a lot of guys to try to do it, you know get them up and out. Well, he said he would let the strongest man and the first woman to get pregnant ride them.
[ 220 ]
How cool is that, gives us something to look forward to, right, asked the kid, brite eyed, and enthusiastically?
Later that day, BR, was passing the time, obsessively, trying to get his screen up, he was having a hard time getting his eye scan password recognized, and was sitting on a rock just outside his tent, the sun was baring down on him and he turned around to get into shade, when he spotted someone approaching.
Year, year I remember you boy, said BR, checking the kid walking towards him. He, took off his old cowboy hat, using it as a fan, looked down at his shadow on the ground, and said to it in faint whisper, wassup? Wassup with this bugga, I wonder wassup?
It was the same teen, who seemed mesmerized by the weird man’s personality and self assured-ness. But, for the boy, he was the opposite, maybe on the outside he looked cheerful, or tried to, but on the inside, he was hiding his sorrow and his deep pain.
He stood there, and he looked so, so weak, the breeze that was blowing, looked like it was going to make him fall over, as he pondered to himself, what do I do now?
[ 221 ]
He was Theo Baxter, a mixed Mexican American, who was barely seventeen, long black hair, thin like a match, and had something he wanted to ask BR, but was ashamed to. He thought, to himself, it’s a crazy question, I want to ask! But this is the man in charge so why not? What is the worse that can happen? He gets angry? He makes fun of me? He laughs at me. I won’t know unless I ask him? And who knows, maybe he’s lonely too? Maybe he can be somebody I can turn to. He’s a little bit like my dad; If my dad was alive, he always knew what to do! I can’t change this world, but maybe this crazy-man can, and maybe I can help him do it!
The boy was looking sad, and pitiful down at the ground, but now got the courage to raise his two eyes up. And he looked at BR, and very slowly, hesitantly let the words form in his lips, and spoke them out : I know you have so much to do, sir. And I need to, I need to, I need to talk to you sir!
Call me Boss, said BR, as he sat there curiously checking out the kid!
I lost my dad. I was wondering if you, if, well, er, I was wondering if you could adopt me as your son? And I, well, do you think you could treat me as your son? I have no one, and I feel dead inside, like my heart is not there anymore! And you, your words this morning, are like sunshine to me!
BR, sat up straight backed and stoic, looking dumbfounded, like somebody just hit him!
What? What, said BR, shocked, shocked by the request, he knew his head was not the best, but this was off the wall, he had to stall, had to think!
As he suddenly looked up and did a double blink, stared at the boy, who had tears in his eyes now, and said : Boy, before I got y’all out, I rescued just two people, Jonathan, and the crazy captain, but now I got all these people it will be hard! See, people like somebody to lead them.
Sometimes they gone like me sometimes not! Problem is death come hunting me,
And I am born to float, I got enemies I gotta smoke! Find good buggars, good buggars to be with me, is hard, see charlie! The bad bastards gotta groke! And it’s hard to be rock steady, back to back ready, if I had a little son like you! Hell. You know I am a killer right?
Yes, sir!
Yes, Boss, repeated BR, reminding him, again!
You still want me to be your daddy?
Yes, Boss!
[ 222 ]
There are men in this camp, I don’t know who they are, who would like this daddy of yours dead, take over so they can be Boss. Find them!
You mingle with them, be friends, keep your eyes spying on them for me, and on everybody, boy! Boy, if you come across folks thinking to get me, tell me!
And you give me time, to get to know you, and trust ya, and we’ll see? In the mean time, if you got some problems you need direction with, talk, come see me. But don’t tell anybody that you’re my son, and keep secret, what I said to you! You think you can do that?
Yes Boss,
What’s your name son?
Baxter, Alejandro, Theo Baxter! Then, without saying another word, BR, smiled blinking at him, then stretched out his fist, making it like those hand puppets! And made like a ventriloquist, and made his voice change, sounding funny, and come out the character on his fist, and told him ;
Ultra shine, Ultra shine, there is no two of a kind! I am one of kind Baxter boy! Guns are my toys! I’ll kill ya in a minute! Don’t cross me! Ha, ha, ha, . . . Gone tell,” Sally,” bout you, now go, get some shut eye son, and I ‘ll see later!
[ 223 ]
So, after listening carefully to the young teenager, named Baxter, talk about the meetings, and BR’s survival classes. Judy’s take away was intellectually, it was about stuff she had learned way back in college :
Family construction, and reproduction issues, and nascent communal institutional initiatives, and incentive group manipulation. Wow! She thought to her self : it’s all obvious to me, he laid-out a matrix, for all foundational concerns and considerations, which are the precursors, to re-establishing a new world order! And a new world order, all under this madman’s control. And all this positive thinking coming from a wild eyed country bumpkin with a cowboy hat, boots, guns and personality disorders! Things just didn’t add up, she thought. She regretted missing the meeting. But remained conflicted more-so now, that he was publicly emphasizing what, in his opinion : It’s a woman’s duty to get pregnant. And being one, his words were especially poignant and insightful, and begged the question, were her assertions, that he is mad possibly somewhere in-between right and wrong, and she asked herself, if that is true, what the hell does that mean?
What the hell? What the hell does that uneducated, ill informed, pin brained, naive madman, unconversant with proper protocols mean?
He said, that all reproductive girls and women of all ages, need to what? Need to get pregnant by the end of the month?
[ 224 ]
Who does this poor excuse for a man think he is? Sex? No! Non compliancy, is all he is going to get from me!
But, she acknowledged, before he came out and declared what he did, about what we females must comply with, it was all speculatory at best. But, now despite all the good things he said, this obligatory pregnancy law, I am morally outraged! It freaks me out!
Confounding me?
Suddenly, she be came solemn, and melancholy, as her mind shifted to her family, and not just what would her future be like, but her past, her families deaths. She wished so desperately to see her brother, Charles, who was her brother but, not just a brother, but someone she could confide, and understood her. It was he, who she loved best out all her brothers and sisters. He was the one who always showered her with advice, she thought about her mother Sagas Saintclare, and her pop, teddy as she called him ; Theodore Saintclair. It was difficult to nearly impossible to fit in her mind, that they were gone. They were the corner stone, upon which her life revolved. She missed all them so very much and slowly she passed the time thinking about them, and how they met their end. Something she’ll never know, but wanted to! She could not help thinking about it, and it evoked a keen sense of sadness and regret. She cried a lot about it.
But, that was nothing, nothing, in comparison to being forced to become a mother, not for love, but posterity! Preposterous! When I see him, I am going to slap his face! Madman!
[ 225 ]
Mean while in a different time and place BR was informed that the Captain had gone totally bizarro crazy again trying jump in the fire again!
The people were wandering around in the cavern looking at the boiling water, with their flashlights flaring all around exploring the cave, when a man came in, walk up to BR, and whispered something in his ear. Boss, you told me to keep eye on him. Year, well he’s out of it! Shit, really? Yep! It’s happen again. He done it again, I don’t know what you want to do about that! You want to check him out, Boss? Ok, BR, replied frustrated, so, BR and the man left. So, back at the camp the two men arrived and sure enough BR, saw it was the captain going crazy! Seems like your day of reckoning has arrived, said BR, to the old Captain, who looked like a looney toon! Jonathan, year Boss! You, you, you said he tried to kill himself, five times in the last hour? Year, Boss. Captain is that true? The captain wasn’t looking at BR, or listening, and was ranting uncontrollably. And when BR, questioned him, he rapidly started shaking his head back and forth, and around, like he was trying to shake his head off his neck!
And said to BR : Why sopbonngut ban lacky me, goodu. me that me memory you thank you mom mommy, ye, you saved me?
And so hearing that set BR, off, getting in to the act of craziness too, which he knows how to play it, as if it is real!
And BR, got down on the ground, drop to his knees, raised his hands up to the sky, and acted like he was talking to the sun up in the sky! And replied emotionally and with plenty of vigor in his voice. And began to yell :
Oh hear me my my son, Oh hear me! My son of a gun! HOWOOOOoooo. DID you not hear the word, thou shall upon body harm not? Did you, you harm your self my boy? Son of god, did you, my fellow brother? BR, asked him, almost with tears in his eyes! Did you try to jump in the fire again Captain?
“Me, yes I got to escape! I got to escape! I got to escape! Ahhh ah cough escape! I me, I, mommy I rouf rouf!” The Captain started to howl like an old wolf Dog! AHoool hooo rouf ohow oooooOOOO!
Did you try to jump in the fire again Captain? Answer me, for God is talking through the sky above and he wants to know boy, did You?
[ 226 ]
I got to escape! I got to escape! Ahhh ag!
But, let no one criticize the good or bad I do, cause you not no what is true! And bare pain or carry my distain upon the land, and you did. Yes, you my son did you? Didn’t you? Answer God Captain didn’t you? Say yes lord!
No me me got stop me got to escape.
NO! Did I hear you say no! God thy lord, no! Did you try to commit suicide by jumping in the fire?
Me I me want escape.
Did thou one you do something bad, Captain? Tell the truth, lord thy god, you said to him no? Did you insult Thy God by saying no to his commandments, was it not your command to obey his word? Was it not your command to follow his word, and what did’ith thous do? Tell ME? Tell ME, go ahead admit your sins?
Speak Captain speak!
Oh no, Me, I just want it to stop, I talking in my head I can’t, I cant make it stop got to escape! The people in my head!
Tell me did you break the lords commandments? Tell me, go ahead speak, Captain speak!
[ 227 ]
Me no know. I got to get out!
Out, out did I hear you? God made the world and put you in it! If he didn’t want you to be in it, he would put you out himself! And how ungrateful you be, insult him you to him thee, you say you want to leave, OUT! You want to get out, how many good righteous souls want to get in and you want out, shame on you! Captain shame on you. May the lord, thy god forgive you not? For disgraced his body thous has done, child of the lord. For verse 15 “: What then? Shall we sin because we are not not under the law, but under grace? God Forbid, for the hearers of the law are not just before God, but the doer’s of the law, shall be justified.” Their, brother, there is no getting out! None!
Me got to get out.
Get out to out my heaven, get out escape out to my heaven, to my heaven mine no! No in to hell maybe, into hell maybe, but the lord says no to you for you are a sinner, and we don’t like you anymore. I to you see you have been a eater of meat, you drink, you disrespected my holidays nor moon nor god rest in peace tombs shall upon you shine, many have resurrected, many have dis affected many wrote the shortening of days and the shortening of hours and the, the of minutes cut in half like sliced bread, still only one crumb is left said the lord, but the time has come, prepare your self, Pray!
Me, me pray Mommy?
Thats right say onto me mommy, and repeat after me boy say:
Mommy I have been a bad boy!
Mommy I have been a bad boy,repeated the Captain.
Well, guess what? Guess asked BR. You must go into grave. The time is at hand to die! And BR rose up, and jumped in the air and pulled out his gun from its holster and aimed at the man’s head and came walking over to him, and then stopped, put his gun away back in his holster, and said to him whispering,
[ 228 ]
You tell me? Tell me? Why did you jump in the fire, is it that you love Satin, my lord, Gods enemy? BR, face changed and flashed full of anger and hate and jump at him and grabbed him by the neck and started to choke him you said, NO! You said no to no to the lord! Then he spat in his face and released his neck, got to his feet and kicked the Captain in the chest. He looked up to the heavens and raised up his both arms to heavens. And said something to the sun up in the sky, and walked around the captain who was now looking back at him totally shocked. Then BR, walked over to Jonathan who was also looking wide eyed and was shocked. And in a low voice, as natural and calm as can be, he said to Jonathan, you know Jonathan to your point, I think you’re right he is nuts.
Ye, er um er um yes, yes, Boss, said Jonathan, amazed and stutteringly. I know, See, Boss I told you, I told you he’s nuts! We can’t control him, he’s a goner! Ok, I don’t got time for this shit, snapped BR. And I know there are no hospitals doctors or mental institutions for the boy, so I got to put him down! What? What, asks Jonathan shocked! You heard me, Jonathan. The man is a dead man walking. Only thing to do is put him out of his misery. Well, I don’t know I thought maybe since he thinks you’re his mother, you might calm him down, Boss? No, put him down, thats whats needed here! Think about that, Hmmmnn, come to think of it, we gone need a cemetery, a cemetery is what this place needs to bury its future dead people. Remind me about it later Jonathan asked BR, off handedly. We gone take him after I shoot him, to big a chasm in a cliff, I found a while back. It’s about twenty feet deep, and about mile from the camp. We can throw his body down there, or if thats to far, since we don’t got no transportation, perhaps we could dig a hole and bury him close by, a ways from the camp. Either way his body is already in the ground! BR, lit a cigarette, inhaled and blew the smoke out, and said as he raised his gun and put it to the Captain head, time to go bye-bye Captain! He put his finger on the trigger to pull it to kill him, when just then the Captain looked at him in his eyes while the gun was pointed at his forehead, and smiled and said,
[ 229 ]
nice Mommy! Nice Mommy nice Mommy! Thanks,
he said again and smiled and closed his eyes to receive the bullet, and it was then BR, realized thats why, the Captain was causing such a ruckus, so I would do what he wanted to do, and that was to help him kill himself, and he said sorry, you don’t get it. Not to day big feller! What, said Jonathan? He wanted me to kill him, Jonathan. But, looky looky a brand new cookie, Lucky for him I know a little trick, I learned back when I was in the special services! What, I don’t get it, Boss? Few do, Jonathan, especially guys like you, dude! You’re not supposed to! Now listen up. Heres what I want you to do, and since the people are away, and the camp is empty this is the perfect time to pull this off! No witnesses to interfere. We got to do this quick, see that speaker box, over there, he said pointing, crack it open and take the magnetic speakers and bring it to me quick, I am gone get the defibrillator while you do that. But, why Boss, don’t ask me nothing. Just do it, said BR! So, the two men went about getting these things and then came back to where the Captain was tied up to a pole and BR, said to the Captain laying on the ground, Mommy needs you be a nice boy, as he pulled out a rag and rapt it around the Captain head and duck-taped around it, so it wouldn’t fall off then he got the Captain to stand up and and walked over to the metal hull of the boat and grabbed the rope and slammed the man’s skull into it again and again at full force, bam, bam, bam!
[ 230 ]
Then grabbed his neck and forced his head straight into the metal bashing his forehead up against it, POW! He slammed the man’s forehead into the metal wall several times un-mercifully, bam bam bam, till the Captain fell backwards unconscious! OK, quick take the speakers and you placed one on that side of his temple and I’ll put the other one the other side and we’ll duck tape it up with the duck tape real nice! Ok, Boss but, Shit shut the hell up, Jonathan, I don’t time for your questions. Just do it. Then BR, took the Defibrillator and gave the man several electrical shocks to the head! He did it, again and again jolting it several times more and said to the Captain as the man woke up. Good morning, son! Hi, it’s me. This is your mother talking to you son! Your mother, I want to welcome you home son, you gone be all right. I know your head is hurting now but the pain will stop. Son I am your mother. And as your mother you must obey me and do every thing I say Other wise Mommy will get angry! Do every thing I say, cause I am your mommy? You, do every thing I say, cause I am your Mommy. Do every thing I say, cause I am your mommy?
[ 231 ]
Yes, yes, yes mommy!
Now, son, stay quiet a little while and drink this, he said giving him a drink of water, and telling him, this is hot mineral water from the center of the world! It will make your mind feel peaceful and if you get into a fight, bullets won’t hurt you, unless I say so, and you will be happy and I will take care of you! Do you understand Captain my son?
Yes, Mommy you will take care of me,
Yes, son I will. You will make sure nobody tries to hurt mommy, if anybody tries to hurt mommy you kill them got it?
Yes, Mommy, I will kill them.
Good, now you just stay here quiet resting OK?
Ok!
[ 232 ]
And the men got up and walked a few feet away from the captain who laid befuddled on the ground sleeping and Jonathan said, Boss whats happening? BR, didn’t answer, but smiled. He raised his hands up and lit a cigarette and walked back to the camp and took out a bottle of Barcardi Rum, twisted off the cap, threw some on his hands to wipe off the Captains blood. And then opened a can of coke and mixed it in the bottle of rum and took a swig, and said, ahh, good, he said after tasting it. You want ? He said holding out the bottle to Jonathan meaning if he wanted a taste? Jonathan, shook his head meaning no, but then confused, took it quickly and drank some. What did you do? Don’t worry, he’s back! The Captain is back! He won’t be back the same as he was before. But at least I didn’t have to shoot the boy!
[ 233 ]
A little later, we see the Captain being placed on the ground, next to a chair, and in the chair is BR, who is wrapping a wire around the Captains head! After removing the Duck tape, and, now he’s fixing in place, these two speakers, right atop the Captains head. One speaker, covering over one of his ears, and one speaker is covering the other! Like they were headphones, and BR, strapped them on to him, tight, with wires, and tightened them up so they wouldn’t come off. Then he gave a sign to the Captain, not to move and that he would be right back. BR went to his tent, and de-activated a secret string to a live grenade, he had as booby trap in case of a thief might get ideas, took a key and unlocked his shotgun from a big metal box, holding the rest of his gun collection, and chained it! And then, the rest of his secreted purported contents back, and covered them over. He re-set his hand-grenade trip cord device, to blow up anybody stupid enough, who’d try to steal his stuff!
And, then he came back over, smiling like nice mother to his child, and gave the big shot gun to the Captain, saying kill anybody, who I tell you to. Yes, Mommy! Nodded the captain smiling. Good boy, you and me, gone get along just fine! Here, son, he said, pulling out a small bottle of rum and handing it to him, relax and bit, and have some? Why don’t you come with me to the cave, that’s where the folks are, come on Captain, you too Jonathan and the three men left.
[ 234 ]
Earlier, Baxter a teenager attaining the meeting commented, my parents taught me the value of minding my own business. And saving some of my allowance for a raining day and woking at a job as waiter in a restaurant help me, greatly in getting to know how the world worked, now when my parents have passed away in this catastrophe. I feel lost, but when, when I am somehow listening to BR. He makes me feel incredibly different, like we have chance, A chance! A chance at starting over! You know what I mean, he said, to his friend, another little kid his age named, Bobby. Well, the boy shook his head, and pushed his hair out of face, and said Bobby, I don’t think he’s that cool, cool at all cause, he wants us to do what he saysI He wants to be Boss! And he is my father! And he doesn’t want anybody, anybody to have a say nothing. Who the hell he thinks he is anyway. BR, is the boss, plain and simple! Bobby, think about it! If it weren’t for that old dude, we wouldn’t be here now! And Baxter went to make some some coffee, and sat down thinking about all he heard BR say, the more he thought about it, the more he felt optimistic about everybody’s future. Later, he laid back and got some shut eye, and then heard a wind in the distance starting to blow, a faint odd sound, like a cat blowing in the wind sounding like ” meowoooooduck, meowoooooduck, meowoooooooooooduck!”
[ 235 ]
Later, the afternoon came riding in ever so slowly, chipping away at the long empty hours in the day, and slowly the desperate parties in the group began finding their niches, and making their friends and little associations with each other, and slowly all of them everybody, was coming to the realization that they, and they alone are the ones left in the world. And slowly they started to feel the beginning of group identification as, survivors, albeit by the urgings of BR. The children of which, there were an assortment of boys and girls, varying in ages from : three years old to seventeen years old, who were eager, and their temperament rotated back and forth constantly, between feeling happy, sad, and inquisitive, and in disbelief that their parents weren’t ever coming back! They were sad without them. And they felt a great over bearing punishing lost in their hearts without them, some kids were getting bogged down deep in depression. So it was a happy surprise to them, when BR, came out gather the kids over around him, to show them a game he called, fate! ” kill the bad times.” He brought out a big pot of kitchen knives and gave it the big kids and told them to trying throwing it at a tree! And that the tree was their bad times! And they should throw the knife at the tree, for punishment for bringing them sadness, and bad times on them. Well,BR started the thing off! And low and behold BR, he pulled out a big kitchen knife from the pot, and blindfolded himself, and threw a knife and stuck it into the tree to the amazement of the kids and adults alike!
The kids, now took to the idea like glue, of course they were told not to use blind folds, but they, heard from BR , that it was a way, to get rid of your bad feeling and let out your sadness and frustration, and help them forget!
[ 236 ]
And he told them it would make them feel better. Soon, practically all the kids, save for the babies had a kitchen knife in their hands throwing at the tree! He would allow three throws, then blow a whistle and the kids would run and retrieve the knives and do all over again. He put one kid named, Baxter and an adult woman name Koto, in charge so the kids had someone older guiding them and making sure they wind up killing each other, then he left. The day was long, long, lots of time on people hands, BR thought to himself he definitely would have to figure a way to change that, ” Idle hands hath time to sin!”
Now later that day, BR sent The Captain to get him some hot water from the caves to make the coffee for everybody. He gave him some heavy rope and tied the empty water cooler jug with it around the handle, so he could drop it in the streaming boiling hot water, and pull it out, and cap it, and drag it to the camp, so they could start to make some hot coffee for every body as was custom. Well, the captain left around two pm in the afternoon and it should take him ten minutes to do it so he sent him to fetch it.
So, the guy was walking through the encampment, and on his way he went over to the mens section of the camp where BR
[ 237 ]
said the men had to be separated from the women. BR had told them, at first the arrangement, was going to be, that all the folks that in the beginning so everybody felt comfortable, that the folks on the left side is for men, and the right side of the camp is women and the middle is kids and the backside is for married couples and folks who wanted to live together as couples. It was simple solution and it was working. Later he order the woman be guarded by himself and then some others, to keep a eye of them, and security!
And so while the Captain was passing through, he met up with some of the men folk!
A Latino, guy by the name of Bennymoray and another one, a big black dude, named Dizzy and one more a man, named Garfield, and couple of others, who were drinking and playing cards and they started up a conversation with the old man, but making fun of him, and sounding up on how he looks! They laughed at him, with those radio speakers taped to his head with duct tape! And why was he was wearing them, and why his face was all swollen up! And the captain was in no mood to talk about anything about what happen to him, when all of sudden Bennymoray wrestled the shot gun from him, and pushed him to the ground.
And Bennymoray, laughed and said, well look it here y’all, guess what? Guess what we got? ha, ha, ha.
It seems, we got the gun now! Don’t it boys, asked Bennymoray, a shiny haired, Puerto rican dude with a thin black mustache, and a cigarette dangling from his lips! He smiled shaking his head up and down gesturing proudly with the big shotgun in his hands rubbing its shiny surface, as it glistened in the sunlight.
He walked over to the Captain laying now on his back looking up to him. It was hard for the Captain to see his face in the glare of the noondays bright sun, but he could hear him well enough, and what he was saying wasn’t good. He said, times funny! There is a time and place, and a place and time to die! The men were all concerned, this was happening fast, it this guy wanted to kill BR, and with BR, out of the way, and dead, would that mean, chaos would take over?
Or was the idea of this camp, a lost cause from the outset!
Does a man with a gun and no vision, better than a man who is crazy, but crazy in a good way, with a gun and a vision? There wasn’t anytime to think, and sure was no time to debate it! As the three guys rose up macho style and walked stepping aside to discuss privately, what they want to do now that they had BR shotgun! Was it a good thing? Time would tell! Listen Garfield, said we got to do this right the first time! Cause this BR [ BLEEP ] plays stupid, but that’s bullshit, he’s ghetto slick man. You got knock him out first! Kill his ass, dig it? We go shoot him in the back, then break into tent get his other weapons and everything is cool, we home free, homey!
Solid, smiled Bennymoray, agreeing, and then Dizzy, the big black dude, came up with this plan, what about this?
[ 238 ]
I split now, you dudes, wait here, till he comes looking for Captain shithead, and you confront him here, by then, it would of given me a chance to get a weapon out of his tent! Bet? I know he got lots of shit in there, knives too! This way you cover him in the front when he comes, you bull shit him, waste some Bull shitting, small talk, and I will attack him from behind, he’s dead meat You know wha I’m saying bro? Bennymoray, nodding his head, in agreement, said smiling, sweet! Sweet and neat Dizzy! I like it Dizzy! If this shit works out, you gone be my main man, Homey! And we get some booty time tonight, Ha, ha, ha. Whether the girls like it or not, we got the guns! ha, ha, ha!
Then an older grey hair Irish dude name Mikey, who had worked as engineer on the boat joined them saying, I don’t like taking orders from no stupid ass Mexican crack pot, and that’s all BR, is! And now that we got his [ BLEEPING ] shotgun, we should take over!
Hell year, said Bennymoray, who out of y’all is with me, cause this ain’t no bullshit! I am serious as heart attack! I am down with with you baby, said Dizzy, who was a big muscular man as tall as the sky and weighing a ton too! Dizzy, who also was a musician punk rocker, covered head to toe in tattoos, and Garfield, who was a fat looking Eskimo Indian chain smoker from Alaska, with shifty black eyes like a flea at sea! Shit, lets take over this mother [ BLEEP ] said his buddy Mikey! Count me in said, Mikey!
[ 239 ]
Time for fun. Ha, ha, ha ! Then suddenly, Now you don’t want to do that. The boss said he’d get angry, said the captain getting to his feet, but then Mikey hit him in the head with the water cooler jug bottle, BAMM! Making him fall backwards! Ha, ha, ha! They all laughed. Well, perhaps if we shoot your boss, your stupid beautiful person boss will get real angry and drop dead, ha, ha, ha! If you hurt the boss I will have to kill you!
Ha, ha, ha, you crazy[ BLEEPING ] Captain hasn’t anybody told you yet? You are messed [ BLEEP ] up, dude! Ha, ha, ha! The men broke out laughing together! I am gone tell the boss, year you go do that old man, ha, ha, ha! But stay here a minute, Check it out Dude, stay here, or I ‘ll put a bullet hole in you the size of house! Dizzy, said Bennymoray, you wait, time yourself perfectly. I am gone to send Garfield, Mr. G, better yet, one of those kids? He looked around and pointed to one, and yelled, Hey you, punk, come over here, he said pointing to the youth named Baxter, who was watching, scared.
[ 240 ]
Come boy! Baxter came closer and looked up at this tall, tall big man, who told him angrily! Go tell the Boss, go find and tell BR, to come over here, that the captain has fallen ill, gotten sick, understand? Baxter, was frightened, and obeyed and ran to find BR, to tell him! And Dizzy, then said, listen, while BR’s walking over here toward us. Me? I’ll go and take a knife, cut into his tent, and see if I can find another gun and then come up behind him, and we got him covered, front and back and Bam! It’ll be easy street, sweet! Ha, ha, ha, . . But, wait Bennymoray, said. Listen I want to be the one who kills him, not you, dude! I want it baby cause I took the gun from that dude, not you see! Year, I can dig it, OK? OK, lets do do Dizzy! Cool homey! Ha, ha, ha!
So it was that second day, what every Leader, Prime Minister, King, Dictator or President or Ship Captain fears, BR had a rebellion brewing on his hands, as his rule was coming to a final close, as the men planned in advance his bloody demise!
So, back at his camp tent, BR, was happily chewing on one of his special hamburgers, he made for himself from the freezer. He had just put some barbecue sauce on it, and was about to take another bite, when Baxter came, and said, they took your shotgun, from the captain, and wanted me to come tell you the captain had fallen down sick!
And you should come quickly! But Boss, I got to tell you, it’s a trap, they got your gun! What? Year, so you better be ready! What, where? Over there, Baxter pointed to over there in the mens section near the cave! Shit, Ok, come on you take me to him boy, you show me!
BR followed the teenager, concerned, because this was the first time he had let his prized shotgun, he nicked name,” tits” out of his site in a long, long time!
As he was walking he saw some body laying on the ground and there was a couple of men sitting in the chairs soaking up the sun and drinking, every thing looked normal, only thing the Captain didn’t have his tits. As he and the the boy walked closer to the Captain, a voice came from the side as a man was hiding with the shotgun under a large red blanket with bags and packages on top to make it look normal, but it wasn’t. It was a trap, just like Baxter warned him. The strange man sprang up from the ground, quickly tossing aside the blank ket, smiling, telling him, don’t move, don’t even blink or I will shoot you ass mother [ BLEEPER ]
[ 241 ]
put you hands up high or die! Now! BR, raised his hands, and said dinner is at six, I expect volunteers, to help give out the food, or don’t expect to eat my meat! You get your own!
Listen screwball! You ain’t in no Goddam position to tell us shit no more! Turn around. BR, turned calmly around still chewing on his on one of his meat burgers! He loves his meat burgers! And looked down at the Captain and said, son why are you on the ground? Sorry Mommy, the men hit me and took your gun you gave me and pushed me away, and I fell down. And, . . . Wait, Wait, look at what’s at stake? Interrupted BR, angrily, did you say, what I think you said, you said they took my gun away, from you. Did you fight to get it back? No Mommy, cause they got it and they were pointing it at me. So, what? Did I not say, did I not say to you, that no harm shall come’ith to a child of the lord? BR, smiled and shaked his head side to side, and asked gently and calmly. Did you ask them to give you my gun back? No, Mommy! Why? Well, Mommy they were making fun of me, and they had the gun! So what, I gave you water from the power of the lord, did I not? Yes, Mommy! And I told no bullets would harm you unless I said so. Did I not? Yes, Mommy! And you have been a bad boy son! Yes, Mommy! Now come with me! You are going get back up on your feet, and be very politely nice, and ask those sinners, to please give you my give gun back, Yes Mommy! So, BR and the Captain looked at the smiling man aiming the tits at them, and the Captain walks up to the man with the bosses shotgun, and says, Could you please give me the gun? Please?
[ 242 ]
Ha, ha, ha, you are crazy Captain! Ha,ha,ha! Hasn’t anybody told you that yet, ha, ha, ha! Or is that too deep an idea for you grasp? Ha, ha, ha! The men broke out laughing together! I am gone tell my mommy! Year you go do that old man, ha, ha, ha! So while the men were making jokes and drinking and disrespecting you, said BR, did you ask them to give you my gun back? Yes, Mommy?
Ha ha, ha, sure! BR, your jerky Captain, he asked for it but he ain’t getting it. Ha, ha, ha,ha! What I am gone give him is a big bullet in the ass! Ha, ha, ha!
Suddenly far away in the distance, Boom, boom a loud sound of hand grenade rocks the air, signaling to BR, that someone has snuck into his booby trapped tent after his guns! Captain yells to BR, did you hear that Mommy? Mommy, Mommy, BR, interrupts the Captain, saying little dear son, my dear child, your mommy put a pistol, a small hand pistol in your right hand pocket, boy! I didn’t tell before, but I am telling you now! Now, I want to ask that man with my gun, politely, once more, one more time, to give you back the shotgun gun and if says no or tries to shoot you. I want to kill him, take out the gun, and shoot him once in the head. Do you understand me my son? Yes, Mommy, So the Captain smiles at Bennymoray, and bows politely like a little child, and says, excuse me sir, may I have the gun please? Ha, ha, ha sure take this, and the man aimed the gun at the Captain and pulled the trigger, laughing but the gun went
” click,”
But it was empty. So the Captain reached into his pocket and pulled out the pistol and began shooting the man,” Pow, bam, Pow bam, Pow Pow, bam, Pow Pow, Pow, bam! ” God dam you! What is wrong with my poor child, yelled BR, running up to him yelling angrily at him, and as ran he picks up a frying pan laying on the table and begins hitting him up side the head with frying pan! Kung, bong! konk! Did, I say, Didn’t I say didn’t I say use one bullet? Why did you do that? You done emptied out the whole Goddam gun, I said shoot him in the head once. Dam bullets, we only got a limited supply boy! Bullets don’t grow on trees, bullets don’t grow on trees, do you hear me boy? “Bullets don’t grow, on trees,” interrupted the Captain looking very sad, and rubbing his head which hurting something awful! You done be using up my bullets like we got more! Oh sorry boss I can go dig them out of his head if you want? Oh dear, heavenly, Father. Please forgive us this afternoon for sinning, and forgive me for striking my dear son, my little Captain in the head with this pot, my dear son, my fellow human being! I lost my temper dear father, please forgive me, BR, said crying and dropping to his knees and kissing the ground as the big crowd gathered around them totally shocked! Jonathan, yelled the Boss, Jonathan? Yes, Boss, answered Jonathan anxiously. Boy, go fetch us some shovels about six, quick so we can start digging a grave for this misguided youth holey boy! He is so holey, who gave in to bad temptations of Satan our enemy. We must bury this lost soul on the spot, now! Now, do y’all hear!
Can I, I say can I get a witness? Can I get a witness to help me bury this poor unfortunate young nice man, who just happened to make mistake? This poor beloved misguided man. Who will take up a shovel with me, in this hour of sadness, and extreme lost! Well, said the Captain looking sad, I’ll help Mommy! Anyone else? Year, you can count me in, said, baxter one of the teenagers running up into the crowd! And after the shovels got there, and the man who went to fetch BR, suddenly Garfield, the unscrupulous cohort of the late Bennymoray volunteered too! And so did his sneaky engineer dude, Mikey, looking sad, trying to brown nose BR and both pretending to have no knowledge of the death plots connivery they made against him!
[ 243 ]
We open the eulogy with a few words about what the dearly departed brother, who lived through hard times only to pass on, whether it was weakness to succumb to the temptation of the world, or was it in the lifetime of inert twisted crime we will never know? I am touched as such as father, as mother, as son, as daughter, would be because he was part of the our very own Bumble Bee City, survivors community.
He was one of us. And to his friends and ours his good buddy who is laying in a coma, His friend Dizzy, who is now practical a zombie. He can’t think for him self no more, he got a bad blow to his head in an accident in my tent! But luckily he is alive! But, he must be told what to do, such is the ways of revenge of the lord! We are not who, to judge his ways, but to accept his day, and we accept that we are all sinners, and today we offer up Bennymoray, whense he came our dearly departed Bennymoray, He meant to me a chance to give him an opportunity! He served and could become better! He meant to me, a chance to see the promise, we know he will be happy where he is going, Amen! OH father forgive us our transgressions, Amen!
Now, I brought my guitar and I am just gone sing a little song to him to send him merrily on his way! So BR, picked up his guitar and the crowd watched and listened in as he serenaded the departed brother at the funeral. We don’t don’t knowooooo, he sang, what we don’t knowooooo!
Tell me why, tell me, tell me why, this had to be, We don’t don’t knowooooo, what we don’t knowooooo!
My mother nature, you, you can’t be.
Oh tell me why, this had to be!
oh tell me why, why, why
This had to be! We don’t, don’t knowooooo, what we don’t knowooooo! And the little boy Baxter started sing along! We don’t don’t knowooooo, what we don’t knowooooo!
Then the two little doggies, that BR, had saved from the boat, and who were now his, pets, started to sing along too, one he named Biggy, and the other he named Smally and they joined in singing along : how oooooOOOOOOO! How oooOOOOOOOO! Rouf, rouf! Then the Captain started to bark, rouf, rouf ROOOOOooooo and so it went. It was so beautiful! As slowly the afternoon ended.
But earlier it was emergency call! Four women and two men were summoned to the shadows behind the boat to save someone!
[ 244 ]
The sun was bearing down around them, and the situation was bad, and the idea was to use the coolness of the big boats long casting shadow, as a place they could gather in the cool shade, and work out of the bright sun.
The wind was blowing dust, and there was a makeshift emergency room situation happening!
There, was for a floor, the earth to walk on, no walls,
there was for a ceiling, the sky up above,
there was for air conditioning, there was the breeze!
[ 245 ]
There were several large flatten rocks, that would serve as tables for now! One, was a large grayish blue one, that was pretty smooth and semi flat, and on it was a giant big black man, who was laying on it very badly injured and bleeding bad too! The others, around him, were there trying to care for him, to save his life, they had washed their hands and apparently had some medical knowledge but no tools, just kitchen knives and needles and thread and several white bedsheets and a water cooler jug of hot water and one large pot. They got the call to come, all they were told was someone was wounded and they all had heard the big explosion earlier, but didn’t know what had happened till now! The casualty was grave, and caused by an army grenade ordinances set in a booby trap, and now those gathered, had only one thing on their minds : try to save a person.
Stay tune chapter 10 is a crime!
[ 246 ]
CHAPTER 10
The Tweets of Madcow Sammy
BAD PERSONALITIES
BIG REX
Chapter 10
[ 247 ]
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[ 248 ]
OMG ！这是可怕的 ！发生了什么事？看看别担心。只是他按住。我们必须制止流血，现在的白色绷带给我。没想到任何东西像这样，你的家伙是？我是医生陈 谁 你吗？你是一名医生吗？我希望，我只是一名护士。我的名字是茱蒂，我们需要医疗用品 ！我们的需要和我们有什么是两个不同的东西，看看是否你可以对他倒一些水？他的名字是什么？他们叫他眩晕 ！ OMG! This is terrible!
What happened? Look don’t worry. Just hold him down . Give me the white sheet Mao, we must stop the bleeding, now.
Hi! Judy said , I am a nurse can I help you guys, they told me to come over right away? Sure, thanks take this towel will you? Sure! What happened to him? Grenade incident! What? What type? Fragmentation hand grenade! He got concussion to the head, multiple blows to his skull and fragments all over. I don’t think he’ll make it! The penetration of flying rocks, metals missiles into soft tissue and bone is extensive, leading us to think the disposition of patient will be severe retardation if, if he lives! He was lucky!
I agree says Miss Sumatra, he didn’t get the full brunt of the blast luckily, otherwise he’d be dead already. This is true, still, said Mr, Chan, we might have to amputate his ears and . . Might?
[ 249 ]
No way we got cut them off too! His thing too! Yes! Castration or die!
It took time, and the gossip was BR, had his tent booby trapped, so it was definitely an off limits area to avoid. And, everybody especially the children, were told by the adults, don’t even think of going near it. BR’s, attitude was aloft and un-apologetic. And although disconcerting, he was the steward of the inhabitants of this camp, and their immediate communal future, and he seemed to have an answer for everything, and this to everyone was uncanny. Big Dizzy, who survived the grenade explosion, did live barely! And, he was retarded, and BR, took to him and used him as a slave, and after he recovered from the operation, his head was no good. So BR, took the big man’s head, and rammed his head several times unmercifully into a rock wall real hard, just like he did the Captain head, and he used the defibrillators electricity on his brain several times too, making the giant black man extra stupid and zombie like! [ 250 ]
Then he tied two magnetic radio speakers on his head covering his ears like giant headphones too! He looked like he was listening to Music, just like he did on the Captain, and he told him he was his Mommy and the giant man called Dizzy, believed him, and started calling BR, Mommy! And he hypnotized him, telling him to shoot anybody who would not listen to BR!
Now, not only that but, after dinner, came the dark, and he confronted the other two men, Garyfiel and Mikey who were partners in the plan to kill him. He wasn’t going to let that slide, cause he got wind of their role in the scheme to kill him too! And he wasn’t too pleased. It was just after eight o’clock, and he saw the men sitting together drinking and he said to Jonathan, boy, you see the those two guys , he said pointing to them you bring these two guns and place them in their belts and tell them not to touch them, cause i’ll shoot them. Tell them I challenge them to a cowboy duel. The choice I give them is to be my slaves or die, cause if not, I will pull my trigger and shoot them both dead. They are to get up on their feet and face me near the campfire, not try to run and don’t shoot before the they hear the count of three, you are to count to three, here me Jonathan? Year Boss, I hear you! Tell them, other wise I will shoot them now! So that night in the center of the camp by firelight, the three men stood their ground. You two men’s choice is to be a slave or be dead, wait till I count to three then fire, whispered Jonathan into each mans ears, then he walked away and he said out loud shoot at the count of three or say now you are a slave. The air was cool, still and quiet, as the people looked on in the campfire light. It was an old, cowboy scene right out of the old time, western movies, only thing was this was now and was real. [ 251 ]
BR, stood stoically, on one side of the camp some hundred and fifty feet away from them, looking at them, with his old black google glasses on, a freshly rolled weed, dangling from the left side of his lips! Black leather gloves, on his hands, and had his two guns in his holsters, dangling at his side. And the other two men had their guns stuck in their belts, where Jonathan told them, not to touch it. And you can bet dollars, for donuts, they were scared and shaking in their smelly socks on the rocks! If you can think about this scene, some people see poorly in the dark. Maybe, they would have a better chance if it was high noon and bright sun light out, not black night out. A part of that transition the men had, was to confront their personal fears, and their private thoughts, before Jonathan started to count. BR, told him to take his time, and count slow. The minutes passed slowly Jonathan was in no rush. And the men standing uneasy, on the opposite side of the campfire, looking at BR, facing them, started to sweat.
[ 252 ]
Now, it is true, time is funny. It is a finite commodity, when you are a man facing the reality of death any minute now. You suddenly think faster, your mind, your memories zoom into focus instantly. And you think about a myriad of things in an instant too : like a man has a long winding road to travel in life, and sometimes he makes good decisions, and sometimes he makes bad decisions. But even the good decision are subject to fate, fate, can twist a mans luck, buckle it up crush it up like a old dried out nut! But, yes, even the good, who can make bad good and the good bad act sad act of god, can do that just like that! Hard, hard to even begin to understand some men! Each person has his own ways of thinking, and his own individual’s emotions that inevitably, sometime gets in the way, make them do bad things that way. [ 253 ]
Making it harder, and clouding his mind, hindering his ability to be kind! Result, he makes a incorrect decision and is faced with the consequences of his actions! Result, no happy ever after ending. These two guys, these two men, facing BR, Garfield and Mikey, they didn’t know what to think, and had many, many misconceptions.
Misconceptions, they had to work through, but there wasn’t time. There was time, and there wasn’t time. Did BR, posses such extraordinary shooting skills, that he could shoot them both dead at such a great distance? Who was this guy? Why, did he have his Google glasses on? Was he using magnification zoom mode? Did their guns have bullets in it that he gave them? What the hell is the risk reward ratio? What the hell did he mean slave? [ 254 ]
All these preponderance’s gyrating, generating, obtuse, diabolically opposed musings, based in a dark unforeseeable future awaiting them, was zooming toward them at the speed of light, at the count of three. It sounds so innocent, one, two, three, so simple a concept, yet so complex? Simple is treacherously complex?
Mikey, thinks to himself, this shit can’t, cannot be happening? I get out of a boat, where I faced certain death, to face certain death again, out side of a boat to face a gun? Seems like this is just not my God dam day! The bastard is too Goddam ornery, to put bullets in the german luger, he sent me, so if I pull it out, its empty anyway? So he’ll just blow my head off anyway, and laugh! Beside that, I don’t even know how to shoot straight. So this shit is no good anyway. I lost this game. I am a loser! if I want to live. I better make a run for it! Garfield, who was standing a few feet to his right, was nervous too, and the sweat was pouring off on him. His heart was pounded hard in his chest hard, as he could feel the weight of the eyes of all the people in the crowd looking at him. Wondering, what the hell will he do. Will he say he is willing to be a slave?Will he run, shoot, die? [ 255 ] He wanted to cry, but his fears of hearing the count that Jonathan, will make any second now, sent shivers up his spine, so hard man, it was a crime! He began to tremble, his nerves couldn’t take the overload! He fears made him shake big time! It’s like the last call to get aboard the last train, that’s about to depart for the last time! Miss it, and you’re dead! Catch it, and your dead! He was squinting his eyes, best he could, trying to focus on the man called BR, standing across from him some hundreds of feet away! BR, he looked so small in the distance, but the bullet in his gun could traverse that, in a blink of an eye! He thought to himself : What won’t don’t kill you, will only make you stronger! The world splitting apart in two, didn’t kill me. Being trapped in that boat, with nothing to eat, didn’t kill me. And, shit, if I try to shoot him, that [ BLEEPING ] man, won’t kill me, or will he? BR, he will kill me! I got a feeling, and it is bad! Looks like this is the end of the road! That canard that BR, is crazy, is true, crazy like a fox. He has liked killed me already in my mind. I can feel it. I feel he will if? [ 256 ] The long terrible night is filled with strife, as all eyes witness BR exact justice from the two men, who planed his demise. But, there are eyes that hold no interest, ignoring the spectacle they choose to be apart and alone! And Bobby Ritter, his star struct lover! He got a thin black mustache over cupid like lips! His hair cut,’ mohawk style’ with the sides of head clean shaven. A tattoo of Putin, on his ass! He is a taller man slender gentleman, with a wild big jawed look about him. Turn up Pendergrass music baby, make that shit loud! Let it fill this dam cave, and make it come alive! Child, this is our own private discothèque in here! ha , ha, ha! He laughs, putting his hands up and snapping his fingers in sync ostentatiously with the music, he is definitely in-tuned! He reaches into her pink hand bag, and pulls out a yellow can of lemon scented room fresheners and laughs as he playfully sprays it around, and around in the air to the beat of the music! and Meanwhile, Tenika sticks her fingers in her hair and pushes it back briskly, smiling and pleased within her self, she snuggles up close to her man. [ 257 ]
OK, lets!
You know, that I know BR, don’t know shit about our blow, right? Right! And that jive ass turkey don’t need to know, less he gone buy some! No, baby, it ain’t – it ain’t like that! Baby, it ain’t like that but! But shit! Now hold on hole! HOLD on hole! But! But what! But, sugar, there may come a day, understand, see! There may come a day, when we could use this shit, as leverage to get our selves out of jam understand! In case we get jammed up! Dig it! I, ah , ah I see, year I dig, I can dig it! I know where you coming from stinko! I love you! Ditto, but, listen for second . Now! Hear me out baby! We got to be cool, exactly we got to be cool, man ! Right, but for now he don’t got to know shit! Right there you go, now look, check this out, let say we get in trouble with the dude, we can bribe the turkey dig it? Right I got it. You are so [BLEEPING ] smart, you know you should be his partner! Wait, shit did I say that? I take that back, ha ,ha ,ha! No that’s cool! No wait, my mistake I take that back! You belong to me, I rather shoot your ass, then give your ass up! Now, ha, ha, ha ! Child you know BR is full of it. He’s got the whole camp checking that BS out! I don’t need to see that bull shit. I got my own problems. BR, he’s a bitch, I am a bitch, and the, only difference is, he got a gun, honey bun, and I don’t! Well we gone change that shit! [ 258 ]
I hope he does shoot them turkeys man! Twice! No. wait, three times! Oh! You men, are all the same! All you think about is making violence!
Tell me bout it honey! Violence and booty! year, ! Goody, goody! Here snort this! Sniff, sniff, shit man, wow, hymn good smacks it up good in my nose, hole, baby! Right! Sniff, sniff! Snort, snort, hey stay still for a second! Calm down Dam it, let me put it up your nose! Open up! Mommy’s coming! Ha, ha, ha! You know, you know really, we don’t got it so bad? We got each other! Shit year, those people, those bucket-headed people at the camp, will never have love like ours! Shit no! Ha, ha, ha! We are smoking! We are smoking like in Hoboken! We are smoking like in ho bo ken! ha, ha, ha, ha! Got that right! Now honey, what we gone tell them? What the [ BLEEP ] do you mean? What we gone tell them who we are? Well we are man and wife what the [ BLEEP ] else? [ 259 ]
No, I means who we are? You know who we are? We don’t want to say we dope pushers selling cocaine do we? No how about we tell them, we are actors, out of work actors? No, cause then they gone want to know if we know important people and we don’t know shit! year, they might ask what movie we stared in and shit? Right! We can say we are lawyers, shit year I am the judge, gone give your ass $200 hundred dollar fine penalty for jay walking ha, ha, ha ! No make that three hundred years! You will let me out for good behavior? If you kiss me , sure, ha, ha , ha!
How about we tell them we are hair stylists, you know ? Wow, thats cool, I can open up an all male barber shop and do the guys hair, and you can be my assistant, Oh honey I like that idea, but seriously you know I think it would be fun!But still, you know Tenika, we gone have a hard time fitting into this little bullshit city they trying to make. Yep! Got that right! What do you think? Should we run away! You mean leave? Hole, we don’t got to move out of the stupid little camp city. If we do? Which would be extra sad! Cause their ain’t no more [ BLEEPING ] cities on earth! Ha, ha,,ha! It would sad because crazy as BR, is, I love this stupid ass city they are making here! I love the people, I love the insane Captain and the new nut case , whats his name! OH, shit, you man Dizzy? Year he’s cool crazy! Love to go to bed with that big boy, but they cut his,’ ding a link off!’ Ha, ha, ha! Castrated his ass ! Oh ow! OW,OW! Shit! You know that hurts Ha, ha,ha! God Dam child you are nasty! Look whose talking! Look whose talking! Look who the [ BLEEP ] is talking! You wrote the book! Oh shut you ass! … There are so many places to hide! We don’t got to stay with them. We could run away and start our own city! You know what I am saying baby? Look’it here! We could check the landscape out and fine some idyllic spot to relax and chill out, You dig it, baby? Our own city! What the [BLEEPING ] name will we give it? Up you Butt City! Ha, ha, ha! You are terrible! Terrible! Look whose talking? That sounds good! I like it! Where were you when they tried to shoot BR? What [ BLEEP ] you want to know for? Just keeping an eye on you, want to know you know, your where abouts, baby? What the hell for? Make sure you ain’t two timing me! Girl please stop the BS, please! Hearing that you love me is all I want to hear, so stop questioning me, OK! You know this blow is good! The best! Yo, wow no shit, give some more baby. What the [ BLEEP ] you doing? You lumpy jumping up all over the joint like you ants in your ass! Stop jumping all over the place and act nice, baby! Chill! Hell no, we can make love later, all you gone do is smudge my make up! Lets let the sexy wildness hang on out! BS, come lets listen to greatest singer there ever was! Lets dance! Dance? Dancing in a cave? This ain’t no cave! This is the old studio 54! And who you? I am the DJ, cracky wacky, ha, ha, ha! Wow, I feel pregnant! Hole, now I know you high! Put on so more Pendagrass and shut the hell up! Oh, hell yes, I’m still jealous! Zip it! Zip it up! Up yours! Ha, ha, ha![ 260 ]Meanwhile we listen in on a conversation two other men are having in the dark. Garfield, says angrily, what [BLEEP ] SHIT [ BLEEPING ] SHIT happened? I am, what? What? A goddam slave now? That’s what! Shit, I should of let the son of bitch kill me! Well, why you crying now, said Mikey? Why, didn’t you keep your trap shut, and shoot the [ BLEEPING ] bastard? Looks who’s talking? Just look whose talking, shit? Just before the GODDAM, count of three, you yelled,” I’ll be your slave!” So! You too! So! So! So? SO shit [BLEEPING ] now we are [ BLEEPING ] slaves now, that’s what! What the hell did we agree to? To be his slaves! Well, the thorny ass issue, about being slave is this, he said Mikey, meaning he’s chained up, he looked angrily, as was holding up his wrist in then air to the moon, both of which are chained! The moon was out bright, and when he put up his hands the light of the moon reflected off of it. I will remember this god dam night forever, dam what a [BLEEPING ] coward I am! [ 261 ] You know, Garfield, I gone miss my life! I miss my life do you hear? Sure enough do, partner I do too! But, I never had much of life to miss, see look! What the? What the hell is wrong with ? What is that ? What that you showing me? You, you got a hole in stomach?
[ 262 ] Holy shit! OMG! You? Oh My god, If I was seeing this with my own eyes I wouldn’t believe this shit! [ 263 ] Meanwhile way over in the ladies section of the Camp : The advantage of being a person who is nice and quiet and unassuming decent are many, but it’s pretense gets, gets exhausting at some point, when your biology kicks! And you need a man on you! Especially when you can’t sleep and have abundant time on your idle hands! Idle minds unwinds the seams of invisible straight jackets brackets linings that hold us in our place in the rat race, we called life.
[ 264 ] BR, I got you on my mind! Philosophically, I think that he thinks all of this, its like being instances, of being in a world, transcending thought passing into desires, mixed with will and obsessive determination, hidden under the cloak of the pretentious facade of a cowboy confused! I believe, he believes to degree, that he is actually part of our spirit to be, to be here in this camp! Ironically, we are here because of him! What prevails, is the insight to and by him, to feel that we are all connected in away! I am assuming this of course! I have had no deep talk with him at all! Although, I wish this with all my heart. He didn’t tell me this, but something tells this is how he is! I remember the other morning. The other morning, when he was talking to us early that morning on top of the hill! He ran through a series of personalities so easily, so effortlessly, the mere accumulation of facts in each of his personas defies the concept of pretense and makes me think he is what he is. Many real personalities in one, is such a single phenomenon a formation of biological knowledge or a mind whose imagination is so lucid it burst from his head making real what is not, and is that really possible? During the duel in the camp tonight! It was so funny! It was like a play, like it wasn’t real, but of course it was! I did not detect any fear! He wasn’t scared at all. He was enjoying the moment! The young lady goes on thinking to her self letting her mind meander and ever so slowly falls to sleep dreaming of the madman called BR. She ponders what it would be like to, love a man who appears to be able to channel and covers strange lines structures of existence of other people, that appear to be in this world and at the same time beyond it, is that possible? The phenomenon of many men in one is ensconced and virtuality expressed in many people through out history and time, and these expressions manifest in different configurations, irrespective of the century, fractal time, and place, when trans spatializaton existential- analytical beings in the world and out of it occurs, the modes of expression and the behavior in them in many cases are designated and labeled as manic, in which, the speaker by bio design, manifests the ability to have many lives applied as self descriptions of ones selfs life. In the realm of subjectivity nothing is left to chance, and Mother Nature not to be out moded or done, backs this up by bringing up the heavy artillery, influencing the stubbornly dictatorial person to be struck down to size, at the behest and whims of that which is greater than he : Mother Nature herself! She can employ something as simple as a common cold, or an upset stomach, to bring him to his knees! But, but, but, it’s early, the true games have not even begun, as the night breezes blow and a strange call is heard riding the wind currents in the cool refreshing night air,”Meowwwwwwwwooooooduck! [ 265 ] Earlier :
[ 267 ] Y’all, all y’all, been blessed to be alive today. Thank the lord! And to those that passed. I hope you join me. Lets bow our heads in respect, and have a moment of silence in their honor and out of deep respect for them. BR, stood tilting his head down eyes closed, and that gesture set the mood for solemnity of the meeting. Then he walked over to the big screened computer he dragged out of the ship and despite we not having internet access, he was mesmerizing us all with his knowledge about a new way of controlling software interfaces — by waving your hands and making gestures with his hands at one point for just for fun. He used his nose shaking it in the air, in front of the computer screen, it so funny I died laughing! It was hilarious! Nevertheless I think he is mad, just not all the time? I think he’s a part timer! I remembered what she said. That he is a part timer madman, how interesting I thought, anyway she continued : He had extensions cords crisscrossing the floors, all the way back to the ship and although the internet was down, the laptop was hooked to a large screened TV, and had a voice and body recognition program on and he would make hand gestures controlling the inter-active program! And, as he spoke, he emphasized the point : about the importance for everyone here, to make an effort to be strong in order to survive, that hard hungry days were still ahead, and,” we,” as he would say, we got to be disciplined!
[ 268 ] She said, he said it in such a way, it made you believe everything he was saying! He want us to promote self respect for each other, and defend each others rights, and grow to love and be willing to defend to the death this camp site! He wanted the men to fall in line and become strong warriors, who could defend the camp no matter what! That they should learn to box, learn the arts of self defense and learn how to throw knives! And, he admitted, he said, that all though he would be a dictator, he had the best interest of the camp at heart! And, it was necessary to get us through these bad times to a better life in the future, and what he needed, was our cooperation for his vision of us surviving to succeed. He showed us some pictures he had taken that morning, showing the landscape around us, and how terrible, and bleak it was, and what to expect when go exploring it for our selves! [ 269 ] BR, said, “It was amazing how far we had fallen. But that don’t compare to how far we gonna to rise!” Again the people were mesmerized, enthusiastically, applauding his speech! We have to start basically from scratch, he said, and he wanted the men to form brigades to design a large hall to store our things in! And each person, should contribute time to build a house, and that if we each helped the next person, together, we all will eventually have a home, to call our own. He said something, I found very insightful, she said, pausing, and then after a long silence she said! BR, said we will have to pay for things with money, but the money will be sometimes be bartering for good and services. We have two people, here he said, who are doctors, to see them, you can pay them, by helping them build their houses, or working for them or barter what you can. That’s my idea, what’s called Big Rex Care! no, co-pays! We have one or two nurses! And, a few ladies willing to work and become nurses aids. They can be compensated the same way, if they want to help you when your sick! But for now, I want the worker teams, assigned on mandatory work crews each day working on house building details! The house can only be, as I said before, it’s got to be constructed and approved by me, or one of my construction detail captains. Maybe, some of you, you have learned or heard that I done organized worker crews to search far out from camp, for anything alive! They’ll come a day when animals come back. We don’t got, none now to be fearful of, but that don’t mean, critters like wolves aren’t coming back. So, for the safety of our city, and like I said, I am naming our camp, Bumble Bee City! A wall, I we build a wall, to keep bad critters, is a good plan. Something in the future we gotta do! I want everybody to know I have organized a group of workers, to go on journeys, exploratory journeys, to search high and low, for vehicles , old cars, car and rocket parts! We haven’t heard back, from them but we hope too, soon! And we hope they have good news! I am personally gone lead an expedition soon. I’ll be gone, for a while, and gonna take a lot men folk, with me! My, warrior captains will be left in charge! [270 ] What do you think of your flag you had? You remember from your country? What, what it meant to you? Well, every nation is represented by a flag. It all started with the introduction of the cloth, called silk. You paint on it. You wave it! You hold it high in the sky. You fly your battle flag high. Then, was it not true? The Chinese did it, then the English, the Crusaders, the Muslims, The Jewish Star of David, the Africans, The green flag of Saudi Arabia, National Flag of the Philippines, The flag of Russia has three equal bands of power, and the Red white and blue of the USA, the Jamaicans too, billions of people, billions, too much to mention, through the heraldry, symbolically! What does it, tell me? What does it say, say to the people? It is theirs, to which, in protection of their honor, they are willing to die for it! willing to spill their blood! Symbol? Yes, said he, shaking his head looking at them, emphasizing it deadly seriously, right in their eyes! You children listening along to me, pay attention! Learn this! Vexillology, is a word, that means the study of flags symbolism, and the usage of flags! All people need one! Us? Yes us? As survivors of death, I think we deserve one! Don’t you? Don’t you, he asked, his voice blasting, staring with his eyes all aglow, at not just the children, but all the people looking at him! Stressing the point, and it was not something they could to hear just yet, but still, just imagine, on thinking about it? But they nodded their heads, and they came around, and agreed! And without saying a word, beamed proudly! The crazy man had insight, vision and a creed!
[271 ] BIg, Rex said : The flag’s power of unification, is in the eyes of the beholder!Then, he bent down a pulled out of a bag on the floor, something! And he raised it high, and showed it to them! They didn’t know what it was! Then BR, said : I have made the design of The Bumble Bee City Flag! He held up, this white cloth high, and pointed to the red stinger of a Bumble Bee, shaped like a lightening bolt, and said : The red stinger of the Bumble Bee, says to any potential foe, we will fight back, will all our might! The BBC, pay attention to me, we pledge allegiance to thee, BBC! [ 272 ] BIg Rex, took time out, took a moment, and looked very pensive, as if, he was thinking about something serious, to himself. And he thought, Who knows? And, I swear, if I remember correctly, the boat looked like it was in plenty good condition! Things turning out not to scabby for me! I ain’t dead, and the people I got, ain’t dying yet, and they listening to me, too! Holy moley , buckle my shoe! What is a cowboy, gone do? I better find some. All the can food I found, in the boat, so far, . . . Should last six months with luck. After that what?
[273 ] Now, I remember, before I climbed down in that boat, I remember, I stood, I stood up looking at the scenery, on top of the captains boat, and looked out and saw it Did it have food we could use? And, I needed lots of help, I mean that, boy! Maybe it look like I had it together, but brother! That was the farthest thing from the truth! I was just improvising! So I called the guys together, all o them! Using a list of men that signed up to be warriors. See! And, I told them we need to get ready, that we be leaving on an expedition to investigate the surrounding country side, to make sure it was safe! Ro’Nine, was a tall, heavy set super black man, who looked twenty years old, but really was a bout seventy, and strong looking, shiny muscles, hard as nails type personality, could shoot an eyelash off a fly! He only had one eye, was missing some teeth, but could punch hole in the wall, with no trouble at all! Just the boy I need, when I needed him! Ro’Nine told me, his mom wanted a handsome looking son, and made his face look like a celebrity, and gave him a combination of red and zebra striped skin, and choose long blond hair for him. Ro’Nine admitted to me, he didn’t like the crazy zebra skin tone too much, but he liked that he looked unique, and women, he said smiling, found him attractive! And besides, now a-days, that, lots of parents want their kids to look really good, but different. It’s the style trending today! At least, maybe that’s the way it was before the end of the world?
[274 ] And shucks, I done seen dudes, and gals too, that got florescent green skin, and red hair too. Uck ka book ca boo, ha, ha, ha! So year, lots of these Crispr, folks walking around nowadays, and since the buggas on that cruise ship had money, you know they were designed up too! Walking around looking like they teenagers, when they way over a hundred! Yes, Boss, Er, yes Boss, what time? Now, you got any questions? The Captain knows where in the boat, we might get some! But remember I got his keys, so see me if you need to! Get the boys to get cables! You know, those CCTV, old cables lines, they use to use before things went wireless, they got them old lines still installed up in the ceilings of the boat, tell them to cut a lot of them out. And get lots of it, cos I gone need it, to use as rope. Oh, year, wait I almost forgot, bring out some chains too! And you remember, that I found a box of padlocks, there, in my tent. Bring them out too! And listen, those nasty old crooked son of bitches, that tried to shoot me! Get my slaves, Garfield and Mikey working on that, lickity split! Understand me? If they give you any lip! Tell Dizzy, his mommy, said to beat them in the head! Yes, Boss, replied Jonathan, writing all this down on his recorder phone! [ 275 ] So time passed, and next morning, everything was done! Well, sir, it at first looked small to us, when we saw it, off far away in the distance, you see!
[276 ] And, shit! It was awesome, the ships surface was a reck, boy, talk about a messed dump! Garbage and stinking fish bodies all, all over the place! After checking the boat out, good, we saw that on the lower side windows of the ship each window, had water, lots of water was leaking out! And it was obvious, this ship, was in the ocean before, and somehow got thrown in air and landed here! The soft sands cushioned it, it was soft, and it landed here somehow intact, little damage! I check out the rim, the ships railings, and asked Ro’Nine to check it too. Where were all the sailors, the people? Were, any folks alive on board? I certainly didn’t see none, looking up at the boat from down there, next to it, standing the sands! It took us a long ass time to get there. Tell ya that much! But we took water. Jugs of water! We had lots water to drink, and before sunset, we arrived! But, it didn’t take long, for me, and everybody else, wanting to climb up! See what was what? So, what we did was to throw up rope ladders with a hook, climbed up, and once we got over the ships railings, we realized it could only be a miracle what we saw! We saw, dead dauphins, and a [ BLEEPING ] big ass whale, and a huge [ bleeping ] octopus too, that had washed up on board. And when we tried to get into the ship, it was blocked with all kinds of trees, and debris and stones the size of cars, and wings of birds, and missing legs of animals and when I tried to get down into the boat myself, there was this one large metal door, with lots iron beams leaning up on it. The other doors leading into the boat were blocked completely but this one, I felt we had good chance of moving the stuff out of the way and getting in. I wanted to open it. So, I got the men to pull the beams out, and about twenty men, pushed the door back. Well, people was inside. Food was what I needed! I took a couple of men, down into the boat, it was like dark inside, we hears water banking up against the walls, as we swam in! Let me tell you it was spooky! It was like entering a big cathedral of death, it was full of water, but, we saw lots of boxes floating on top, but the majority of the boxes of can foods was sitting on the bottom. [ 277 ] But then, the men called me, they found this here, robot that worked on the ship as security, and it was buried under a ton of stuff, but was armed and even though it couldn’t get out, It, So, year, bad news, sure, but I didn’t want it to hurt no body, and I didn’t want it to be destroyed! See this fish, bad boy that he was! I could use a robot! Shucks man, we ain’t got none! And he’s still working! Maybe as we go along, we find lots more! Who knows maybe a lot of robots survived too! Something I didn’t think about too, tell y’all the truth! Year, our Earth blew apart and burned, but robots don’t burn, or get heart burn! Might be a lot of these iron buckets heads, hidden, and buried all of over the Goddam place! Now this boy, this metal head, Something I sure in hell, didn’t want to do, right now! So, I thought about it, and among the campers, who did I knew, knew how to program too? Felix? Year! Felix was the man! [ 278 ] MEANWHILE : In the meantime, I went to the front of the ship, to get away and be alone and have sometime to think! My life was just spinning out of control, things happened to fast, said BR! There are days when all I like doing is sitting in the afternoon rays of the setting sun, and have nothing to do, but fry bugs in my frying pan! Is that asking too much! I don’t think I am asking for too much! Bugs! I like the sound it makes when it is frying in the bottom of a hot pot. I like the sizzle it makes as its heats up super hot, and pops! I like the sound it makes when you fry bugs, and it ups, and flip flops, in the pot! You know what? Kind of, well, . . . It reminds me how, how, when I first started thinking, thinking about the world, said BR, letting his mind wander back in time.
[ 279 ] Later I went into the services, got out, still was unemployed, the system was working, but not for me! Then I made a deal, made some big drug cash, took, my stash, on a luxury bus trip that went bad, and crashed! Then, suddenly, his thoughts got interrupted, when, a chick, a beautiful girl walked up behind him, her name was Kitty, she was tanned, voluptuous, and gorgeous! And she had just been saved, and just gotten out of the boat, and had asked who was the leader, and they told her, it was him, and he was down here, in the front of the boat, and she came to say thank you! Hy, my name is Kitty, she looked up to him and said with a gentle voice! She had been sitting for days in water in a black room full of dead people all this time, and she would of drowned and died, if BR, didn’t come! As the folks were pulled out of the bottom of dank stale waters of the boat, they all had to wash themselves off in special room they set up!
[ 280 ] Her body and breasts were clearly visible through the soaked, clinging wet clothes she had on. She looked at him, he turned, and saw her, looked her in her eyes, which were big, black and mysteriously sexy to him. And she said, I asked your men, stranger, who, just who, is responsible for getting us out? They pointed to you. Told me to leave you alone, not to come. But I ran away, and came anyway! I want, she said pausing, as if to cry, in mid sentence, I wanted to see, and thank you, personally! I owe you, the only thing I’ve got, my life. If there is anything I can do, just ask me too, she said, lowering her voice, and bowing her head down, and as she began to weep! Big Rex, looked down at the girl before him, and took a step to get closer! Took his finger and wiped away her tears! And he liked what he saw! What he saw was young fresh and raw, and as a man he was admiring her, and he smiled and she smiled back, their eyes locked in a fixed hypnotic romantic gaze! They seemed, to instantly have a chemical attraction to each other, and hit it off without doing much talking. As if it was meant to be! And he reached his hand out to her, her body was warm, hot! She let her eyes look down on it, and slowly reached out to touched it, with her finger, then took it, and raised it up, and placed it up over her heart, he pulled her to him and he embraced her, and she slowly opened her lips and kissed, and then kissed him harder, some more!
[ 281 ] And he drew her behind a nearby wall, so nobody else could see, and they made love instantly, right then and there! In the open air, he ran his fingers through her long hair, and he pressed down, she moaned, making that special sound women make, when they moan in ecstasy! But it was enough? Was it enough for him? Was it enough for her? She doesn’t even know his name?
[ 282 ] Yes, thought the woman, gazing at this man, who saved her! I would not under normal circumstances get ravaged willingly to this stranger, but, I gave into him, his eyes, his looks, like a wild thing, he took me, and I wanted him too! I won’t lie to myself! I wanted to tame him. I guess I am being naive, I guess I am being foolish. But that’s how I feel. That’s how I feel! I don’t know what to do next? Is there a next? When you give you body? Your, love? He is exhausted, his blood pulses rapidly through his muscles his big arms, since he got into me. I can hear him, I see him breathing heavily. And, I am not ashamed, all this and I didn’t stop! He didn’t stop, we couldn’t stop! We didn’t want to stop mutually! And now I have him in me. And I don’t know his name. I know he is the leader that came and open the doors to my freedom. He and his men saved the people who are alive inside! I know I gave him all, but yet, I don’t know his name?
[ 283 ] How, for the love of the heaven can I, who I am, have done this? I confess, it’s beyond me. I am scientist, I am realist, I am supposed to be intelligent woman, yet, here I am, acting like a teenage school girl, giving her virginity away to a boy! I could hear him, breathing trying to catch his breath, after ramming me hard with his love. I took his head, in my hands and raised it up off of my breast, and asked the question, What is you name? My name is Man! I am a man. I am a man with many personalities. I cannot lie to you. Strange, I don’t even know you! But I must tell you the truth. Now, I just feel like I was born to come out now. My name is Strawberry Lord! There it was. A confession, a moment in time, when honesty is the priority! True, it is that Big Rex, sometimes, when he has sex, when he is having sex, it changes his personality, letting another one rise to the surface. And so she doesn’t know. This is just one of his many personalities! She looks at his face. She see’s it has been roasted by the sun and is tanned, and has tiny fine lines, of one who has seen the passage of time, and has experienced a lot in life! She knows nothing about him, and wants to know all! But what Kitty does know, the world has ended a little while ago, and drowning in this ship was her biggest fear, up until a little while ago too. But now, the sun has come out, and the Strawberry Lord has come. Can I? Can I know you, she said trembling under his weight on her, what do you do, she asked, Mister Strawberry Lord? Strawberry Lord, makes love to you, that’s what he does, he said and kissed me all over hungrily! As If he wanted to eat me! And I was quiet. And I kissed him back, and I felt him rise up and come again! And I moaned, smiled and was happy to be alive, and when he came, I said in his ear : Lord, . . . Amen!
[ 284 ] So we stayed there hugging each other, and comforting each other, for a long time, in a world that time forgot!! And I noticed something strange about him. There, on the floor, where he had thrown off his clothes, he was wearing these clothes: Old cowboy boots! A holster with two pistols! A cowboy hat full of bullet holes! These old style blue jeans, which she hadn’t seen in years, only in old magazines! ! It had no rips, no tears, no painted raindrops on it! It was plain dark blue, slim jeans too! It reminded me of the clothes cowboys wore along time ago. And I don’t know, he seemed mentally, like he was here, and at the same time, far away, someplace else! He seemed like everything was new to him. He looked at me, his body, his feet, and even raised up his hands, and looked at his fingers, like it was the first time he saw them! It was so strange! He was like a new born baby, somehow? But he was a man! I thought he would be telling me a lot of things, so many things! About why he was here, and what had happened. But instead he, he was the one asking questions! Lord, started asking me all manor of things Like he just woke up, and was becoming aware of his surroundings as though, as if, like, like he just awoke out of a dream, and was trying to get his bearings! I thought it was so, so odd. So strange!
[ 285 ] I reached up out of the water, and I felt pipes in the ceiling, and grabbed them, and pulled my self up and held on for dear life, as the water kept rising, and rising inside the boat. My mind was recalling everything that had happened, when suddenly, he spoke interrupting my thoughts, and said : I am glad you made it, said Mister lord! What I want to know, is will you help me? Lord, smiles and kissed her on her nipple and said, yes! It’s a secret! Oh! A secret! Oh, I love secrets, he said grinning and smiling ! And the ship, let you? This ships, owners made some agreement, and we were allowed to do our experiments, out of a special laboratory constructed in one of the many containers they transported around the world. Kitty looking anxious and worried said, . . I don’t know if they still inside the boat? I’m sorry! I If they are not. Kitty, I offer my condolences for what it’s worth! [ 286 ] Listen, I’ve got a lot of men on board, they are my warriors! They call me Boss, and Big Rex, Kitty! See to your needs, and make sure you’re OK? All right? I like you! And want you to know, I am interested in seeing that, one day when the ship has dried out, and all cleaned up and sanitized, you can go and salvage your work and possibly continue. Right, now, I think no convincing argument is needed, for you to understand, we have to be, we have to be, just grateful to be alive! What can you tell me about this ship? Do you know who the captain is? Yes, his name is Captain Kraft. I don’t know where he is, or if he’s alive! Do they have a digital signal system, and communications center, and where is it?
[ 287 ] Everything, now is fractally chaotic! This time, pours down on us, not pleasantries, no, no. no, kitty! Not pleasantries, like sun showers, but oppressive thunder showers of fire! Forcing me, forcing us, to choose to be beasts, instead of educated and civil. I won’t quibble with you kitty! I need you to trust in me, despite what, others say about me, or in time, what your eyes see! The storms, the earthquakes, the demons, from someplace have been aroused, and come here, to destroyed our world with a catastrophe! I want you to make er, a list! Year, a list, and keep a list of everybody, who got out alive. I want to know, what technical value do they have, if any? Tell me all about the history of this ship, any information about the engines, cause if it is possible, I will want to get them to give us light, electricity! I need to know where the freezers are, and supply rooms!
[ 288 ] I need people, Kitty! I can’t do this alone! I need people like you, and doctors too, and specialists, and coders in particular. Kitty, Now I have little time. Now, what I want is for you, is for you to get healthy, and get a lots of sleep! Bye, pretty Kitty, he said getting dressed silently, fixing his shirt in his pants, and turned away and walked all the way back to the middle of the big ship, and disappeared amongst his soldiers! But, peace is not something that stays, and now he leads two lives, and establishes the other boat named Flowers, the new home of the Bumble Bees! When he will make that change, he doesn’t know? He tells the people who he got out the ship, they are his prisoners, and if they want to eat, they must work cleaning all the dead bodies out of the boat, so one day they, they can move in! He sets up a open container, where they are to throw the bodies and burn them, and incinerate them! He leaves most of the men there to guard the food, and see that his orders are carried out. MEANWHILE : He returns back to Bumble Bee City!
[ 289 ] Hi! It’s me , Madcow Sammy, OMG, talk about folks with a problem, if they don’t got a problem, they gone have a problem! © Intermind Weavers 2012 all rights reserved. Said text works are not for redistribution or utilization without express permission of author. |
